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CLEAN jokes.....

Godfather.Godfather. Posts: 12,504
edited February 2011 in A Moving Train
A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and
Placed his order. He said, 'I want three flat
Tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of
Running boards.'?

The brand new blonde waitress, not want-
Ing to appear stupid, went to the kitchen
And said to the cook, 'This guy out there
Just ordered three flat tires, a pair of head-
Lights and a pair of running boards.....
What does he think this place is, an auto
Parts store?

'No,' the cook said.. 'Three flat tires ...
Mean three pancakes; a pair of headlights..
Is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of
Running boards... Are 2 slices of crisp bacon!

'Oh,... OK!' said the blonde. She thought
About it for a moment and then spooned
Up a bowl of beans and gave it to the
Customer.?

The trucker asked, 'What are the beans for
Blondie?'?

I LOVE THIS ONE..........remember it is a BLONDE joke lol

'She replied, 'I thought while you were
Waiting for the flat tires, headlights and
Running boards, you might as well gas up!?


FOR ONCE THE BLOND GETS EVEN
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • CantKeepMeHereCantKeepMeHere Posts: 2,177
    a pair of jumper cables walks into a bar sits down and orders a drink -
    the bartender says "Alright, I'll serve you but just don't start anything."
    My Pearl Jam Fan Videos
    Best on the web - check them out
    http://www.youtube.com/user/cantkeepmehere
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    </left>
    2008 Bonnaroo - 2009 Philly 2&3 - 2010 MSG 1&2
  • Gibson72Gibson72 Posts: 1,245
    What did the 0 say to the 8????


    Nice Belt !
    Gibson1972
  • JonnyPistachioJonnyPistachio Florida Posts: 10,219
    Gibson72 wrote:
    What did the 0 say to the 8????


    Nice Belt !

    :lol:
    it took me a few minutes, but I finally got it. :P
    Pick up my debut novel here on amazon: Jonny Bails Floatin (in paperback) (also available on Kindle for $2.99)
  • mysticweedmysticweed Posts: 3,710
    i overheard two hookers in a bar
    one asked
    how much did you make tonight?
    the other replied
    forty dollars and fifty cents
    FIFTY CENTS !!
    WHO gave you fifty cents?

    everybody
    fuck 'em if they can't take a joke

    "what a long, strange trip it's been"
  • Jason PJason P Posts: 19,158
    Q - What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his brain power?

    A - A widower
    Be Excellent To Each Other
    Party On, Dudes!
  • satansbedsatansbed Posts: 2,139
    An atheist, jesus, zeus, and mohammad walk in to a bar,

    the bartender says, I see your drinking alone again
  • CantKeepMeHereCantKeepMeHere Posts: 2,177
    a mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "sorry we don't serve the likes of you here" the mushroom replies come on I'm a fungi"
    My Pearl Jam Fan Videos
    Best on the web - check them out
    http://www.youtube.com/user/cantkeepmehere
    <left><a href='http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4018/4676758738_20a07ec4f1_m.jpg/'><img src='http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4018/4676758738_20a07ec4f1_m.jpg' border='0' alt='Image Hosted by flickr.com'/></a><br/>
    </left>
    2008 Bonnaroo - 2009 Philly 2&3 - 2010 MSG 1&2
  • AusticmanAusticman Posts: 1,327
    A women walks into a chemist. She goes to the pharmicist and asks. "I'd like to order a bottle of cyanide so I can posion my husband?"
    The pharmicist replies" I can do that!"
    The women repeats her request
    " I cannot give you that. I would be an accessory to murder if I gave you that after you have told me what you are going to do with it!"
    The women reaches into her purse and pulls out a photo of her husband and the pharmicists wife having sex.
    "oh why didn't you tell me you had a perscription!"
    I can't go the library anymore, everyone STINKS!!
  • arqarq Posts: 8,049
    satansbed wrote:
    An atheist, jesus, zeus, and mohammad walk in to a bar,

    the bartender says, I see your drinking alone again

    :thumbup:
    "The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it"
    Neil deGrasse Tyson

    Why not (V) (°,,,,°) (V) ?
  • Nothingman54Nothingman54 Posts: 2,251
    Gibson72 wrote:
    What did the 0 say to the 8????


    Nice Belt !

    I don't get it??? :-/
    I'll be back
  • rollingsrollings unknown Posts: 7,125
    Did you hear about the broken hearted tractor salesman?

    He got a John Deere letter.
  • unsungunsung I stopped by on March 7 2024. First time in many years, had to update payment info. Hope all is well. Politicians suck. Bye. Posts: 9,487
    The current running facebook joke around here (due to the blizzard) is that on the first day of black history month it is a WHITEOUT.

    groan
  • Gibson72Gibson72 Posts: 1,245
    So an guy from Ontario & a guy from Quebec are arguing about things they other can't do...
    The ontario guy--we play hockey better.
    The quebec guy--we are better lovers..
    This goes on & on until the one says...We sky dive better.
    So they agree to have a contest.
    So the Quebec guy jumps, pulls his shoot & his parachute opens nicely.
    As he is coasting down, the Ontario guy jumps & starts to pull his cord but nothing happens. He pulls the emergency cord but still nothing.
    So he goes flying past the Quebec guy....
    As he does, the quebec guy looks down & says "So, you wanna race then"
    And removed his parachute.
    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
    Gibson1972
  • mysticweedmysticweed Posts: 3,710
    a man walks into a clock shop

    unzips his pants and lays his junk on the counter
    the lady behind the counter says
    sir this is a CLOCK shop not a cock shop

    he said i know
    put two hands and a face on it
    fuck 'em if they can't take a joke

    "what a long, strange trip it's been"
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