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Last night i broke up with my girlfriend of 2+ years...

Spot In The SkySpot In The Sky Posts: 1,175
edited 2011 10 in All Encompassing Trip
I had my reasons and I know itll be best in the long run...but its weird not calling or texting her this morning. I hate that i hurt her but i know wed reached the end of our time together.

How long will i feel this way?
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Comments

  • dimitrispearljamdimitrispearljam Posts: 139,721
    i hope not alot..needs a little time..do what you feel..
    "...Dimitri...He talks to me...'.."The Ghost of Greece..".
    "..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
    “..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    time to pick up some business woman that are looking for a little fun.
    81 is now off the air

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  • unlost dogsunlost dogs Greater Boston Posts: 12,553
    Just remind yourself that there was a reason for the breakup and that it you know it was the right thing to do.

    Resist at all costs the impulse to drunk dial/text/email!

    Good luck...
    15 years of sharks 06/30/08 (MA), 05/17/10 (Boston), 09/03/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/04/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/30/12 (Missoula), 07/19/13 (Wrigley), 10/15/13 (Worcester), 10/16/13 (Worcester), 10/25/13 (Hartford), 12/4/13 (Vancouver), 12/6/13 (Seattle), 6/26/14 (Berlin), 6/28/14 (Stockholm), 10/16/14 (Detroit)
  • Hugh Freaking DillonHugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    edited 2011 10
    several years ago, I was with a girl for 5 years. Our breakup lasted about a year. It was brutal. Didn't help that we worked together. Best thing is to go cold turkey, like someone else said, resist all urges to call/text/email (I only had one of those options back then!). And for the love of God don't have "one last go", thinking it will bring closure.

    You will miss her, but you'll both be better off if you don't speak.
    Post edited by Hugh Freaking Dillon on
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • Hugh Freaking DillonHugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    the key is to keep busy. even though you were the dumpee, it's still hard. take up a hobby if you don't have one (lurking pearljam.com doesn't count!). go out with friends, and avoid getting loaded for at least a week or two. doing that will almost certainly spell drunk texting.
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • arqarq Posts: 8,049
    Paul David wrote:
    -The key is to keep busy
    -Avoid drunk texting.

    This man is a genius, follow these rules and you will be fine, good luck.
    "The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it"
    Neil deGrasse Tyson

    Why not (V) (°,,,,°) (V) ?
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    Spot In The Sky wrote:
    I had my reasons and I know itll be best in the long run...but its weird not calling or texting her this morning. I hate that i hurt her but i know wed reached the end of our time together.

    How long will i feel this way?
    sorry 'breaking up is hard to do'

    I'm all for drunk texting...although I don't know how to text...
    cause it might actually get 2 people back together
    which isn't always a bad thing.
    Follow your heart even when drunk ;)
    sometimes love is best without logic or inhibitions
    and sometimes love deserves another chance.
  • prytocorduroyprytocorduroy Posts: 4,355
    first thing to do, summon your independence. keep busy with things that make you happy. idle time may have you second guessing. don't ignore friends/family/responsibilities. sounds to me you are feeling indifference.

    i believe it is possible to remain friends if you want to, but you need a lot of space for a while first, once you have both moved on it is possible.
  • polaris_xpolaris_x Posts: 13,559
    if you broke up with her ... and you truly care for her ... i would suggest being there for her ... that may mean answering her phone calls and emails and texts ... different people have different ways of gaining closure ... i've sat thru 5 hour cry sessions and 3 am phone calls ... it will suck at first but in the long run they will respect you for it and your relationship will be remembered for the good stuff and less the bad stuff ... and it will allow you to be friends with them if that is of any interest ... took me years to realize this but i am good friends with the last few girls i dated because of this ...
  • thesewordselopethesewordselope Posts: 781
    Regardless of whether or not you ended the relationship it will take a while to get use to not having that person around. Its routine to message her every morning and breaking things like that is the hardest part. I find that distance is the best in recovering. Continuing to talk to someone for me, does not help whether I ended the relationship or not. I rarely carry on a friendship with my ex's.
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    is it too soon to ask for nudie pics :?:
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • loadedgunloadedgun Indiana Posts: 1,390
    81 wrote:
    is it too soon to ask for nudie pics :?:

    Of her, that is.
    Midwest. Indy/Lafayette.
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    loadedgun wrote:
    81 wrote:
    is it too soon to ask for nudie pics :?:

    Of her, that is.


    that goes without saying. :lol:
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • polaris_xpolaris_x Posts: 13,559
    thesewordselope wrote:
    I rarely carry on a friendship with my ex's.

    ya ... that used to be me ... but i realized that the reason i was in a relationship with someone was because i respected and cared for that person and vice-versa ... it's hard enough finding true friends - why waste away a relationship that didn't work in other aspects? ... for me, i wished i knew that sooner ... but to each their own ...
  • thesewordselopethesewordselope Posts: 781
    polaris_x wrote:
    thesewordselope wrote:
    I rarely carry on a friendship with my ex's.

    ya ... that used to be me ... but i realized that the reason i was in a relationship with someone was because i respected and cared for that person and vice-versa ... it's hard enough finding true friends - why waste away a relationship that didn't work in other aspects? ... for me, i wished i knew that sooner ... but to each their own ...

    I just find it easier to respect and care for said person, from afar. That could change in time, but at this stage in my life I find that an ex is an ex,... for a reason.

    I do know I am not the norm in the situation as I have had this discussion many times :lol: But, right now it works best for me.
  • polaris_xpolaris_x Posts: 13,559
    thesewordselope wrote:
    I just find it easier to respect and care for said person, from afar. That could change in time, but at this stage in my life I find that an ex is an ex,... for a reason.

    I do know I am not the norm in the situation as I have had this discussion many times :lol: But, right now it works best for me.

    judging from your location i don't blame ya! ... :lol:
  • thesewordselopethesewordselope Posts: 781
    polaris_x wrote:
    thesewordselope wrote:
    I just find it easier to respect and care for said person, from afar. That could change in time, but at this stage in my life I find that an ex is an ex,... for a reason.

    I do know I am not the norm in the situation as I have had this discussion many times :lol: But, right now it works best for me.

    judging from your location i don't blame ya! ... :lol:

    :lol: Those are lyrics from a friends song. I'm Canadian as well :D
  • dcfaithfuldcfaithful Posts: 13,076
    polaris_x wrote:
    thesewordselope wrote:
    I rarely carry on a friendship with my ex's.

    ya ... that used to be me ... but i realized that the reason i was in a relationship with someone was because i respected and cared for that person and vice-versa ... it's hard enough finding true friends - why waste away a relationship that didn't work in other aspects? ... for me, i wished i knew that sooner ... but to each their own ...

    I used to be this way too, and have been in the same relationship since changing my ways. If my girlfriend and I ever do split, I'd definitely like to keep her in my life somehow as she is an incredible person that I do have a deep respect and love for. Love that isn't just intimacy, of course.
    7/2/06 - Denver, CO
    6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
    8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
    9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
    9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
    9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
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