Question for parents of toddlers and above.....

acoustic guy

So my daughter is 4. And all of a sudden the past two weeks she started peeing her pants. Not while sleeping just in the daytime after school. What the hell? I'm kinda worried. Is it a health issue? Is she upset about something? Nothing has changed in our home with our family? My mother thought it might be something she cant control...
Any help would be greatly appreciated.

justam

Be a detective. Think about what's going on when she does it, what's going on BEFORE she does it, what her day will be like afterwards. Maybe it's a reaction to something she is nervous about, something she is upset about, or something she's hoping to avoid? What about the people who are around?

When my son was young, I found I had to look at the entire surrounding activities to figure out what might be causing behaviors that were difficult.

acoustic guy

justam wrote:

Be a detective. Think about what's going on when she does it, what's going on BEFORE she does it, what her day will be like afterwards. Maybe it's a reaction to something she is nervous about, something she is upset about, or something she's hoping to avoid? What about the people who are around?

When my son was young, I found I had to look at the entire surrounding activities to figure out what might be causing behaviors that were difficult.

you are definitely one person in here i would love to meet. Always very insightful...thank you, good idea.
She acts pretty normal before and after from what I see, but maybe I need to play closer attention.

unlost dogs

Are you sure she's going at school? Could she be holding it because she's nervous about going there?

catefrances

4 year olds are awesome. i live with one.. she doesnt appear normal sometimes but thats just her crazy spirit. shes started speaking in a language we thought was just gibberish. i thought perhaps she was trying to speak arabic cause she hears it at the daycare i take her to. but when i asked she said elly talks like that. not sure of ellys heritage. she sees elly at her other daycare so i cant ask.

acoustic guy

catefrances wrote:

4 year olds are awesome. i live with one.. she doesnt appear normal sometimes but thats just her crazy spirit. shes started speaking in a language we thought was just gibberish. i thought perhaps she was trying to speak arabic cause she hears it at the daycare i take her to. but when i asked she said elly talks like that. not sure of ellys heritage. she sees elly at her other daycare so i cant ask.

They are indeed awesome....she makes me laugh everyday. What a gift from God.

justam

acoustic guy wrote:

you are definitely one person in here i would love to meet. Always very insightful...thank you, good idea.
She acts pretty normal before and after from what I see, but maybe I need to play closer attention.

Thanks.

I hope you notice something that gives you a clue as to what's up with her.

catefrances

acoustic guy wrote:

catefrances wrote:

4 year olds are awesome. i live with one.. she doesnt appear normal sometimes but thats just her crazy spirit. shes started speaking in a language we thought was just gibberish. i thought perhaps she was trying to speak arabic cause she hears it at the daycare i take her to. but when i asked she said elly talks like that. not sure of ellys heritage. she sees elly at her other daycare so i cant ask.

They are indeed awesome....she makes me laugh everyday. What a gift from God.

definitely a gift. the toddlemonster is my favourite person atm. yesterday when we got off the bus she hmpffted and informed me i still havent got my trampoline yet. i told her i knew. this morning i asked her if itd be ok if me and her poppy bought it for her for xmas. she said yes.


she also sometimes pees her pants. i put it down to her being excited about wanting to be somewhere else and not wanting anything to slow her down getting there. or if were home, that shes distracted by something and tries to hold on longer than shes able. and finally succumbing to the urge too late and almost making it to the toilet. i dont make such a big deal about it.

justam

unlost dogs wrote:

Are you sure she's going at school? Could she be holding it because she's nervous about going there?

This possibility occurred to me too.

Black Diamond

4 Year Olds are tough.,. My daughter went through a lot of maturing stages, but for no apparent reason would revert to older habits... Including wetting herself... At the end it seemed to be a way to get mom's and dad's attention mostly. The are really smart and probably know you are worried about it and so she gets her attention.

She probably knows you posted this :shock:

tinkerbell

I have a 3 year old who is only just toilet trained and has been really good only a couple of accidents. My nearly 6 year old has never wet herself but I still need to remind her to go to the bathroom as she gets so involved in what shes doing that sometimes she holds on all day and then complains of a sore tummy. It may pay to just start taking her to the bathroom every 2 hours or so again.

Hugh Freaking Dillon

ask her teacher if they ask her if she needs to go during the day. some kids plain out forget. some kids, as someone else mentioned, don't want to "miss out" on any current activity and hold it as long as they can.

I have two daughters. 4 and 1. My 4 year old has sometimes had an accident. She realizes she needs to go but it's too late. She usually makes it to the bathroom, but she hits the floor instead of the toilet! It was mostly just a "preoccupied" thing, and nothing more.

also, ask her if she has any belly pain or has any trouble going during the day. if she tries to go and she can't, but then explodes later in the day, it could be a bladder infection or something.

and I agree........4 year olds are AWESOME.

acoustic guy wrote:

So my daughter is 4. And all of a sudden the past two weeks she started peeing her pants. Not while sleeping just in the daytime after school. What the hell? I'm kinda worried. Is it a health issue? Is she upset about something? Nothing has changed in our home with our family? My mother thought it might be something she cant control...
Any help would be greatly appreciated.

MrMerkinball

acoustic guy wrote:

So my daughter is 4. And all of a sudden the past two weeks she started peeing her pants. Not while sleeping just in the daytime after school. What the hell? I'm kinda worried. Is it a health issue? Is she upset about something? Nothing has changed in our home with our family? My mother thought it might be something she cant control...
Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Definately not a health issue.

We have 3 little ones (8, 6 and 3) so I have a little experience with this one. The two most likely scenario's are 1) Distraction and 2) Stress

4 Year old can be distracted by anything, TV, toys, friends, playing etc. They sometimes forget how bad they have to pee and it just happens.

Stress can be an issue. If there is any slight change in their routines it can affect them. They usually get through it.

Remember - it is normal for a 4 year old to have accidents. Don't let them see you get upset by it. That will make it worse.

Hugh Freaking Dillon

MrMerkinball wrote:

Remember - it is normal for a 4 year old to have accidents. Don't let them see you get upset by it. That will make it worse.

agreed. what's really bizarre, is that my 4 year old hasn't had an accident in MONTHS, and the day after contributing to this thread, she does! She had an accident this morning!

Jeanwah

MrMerkinball wrote:

Remember - it is normal for a 4 year old to have accidents. Don't let them see you get upset by it. That will make it worse.

This is the first thing I thought. Plus, at this age they need to be reminded to use the toilet. I still remind my 7 year old, out of habit.

pandora

I too thought she has gotten into the habit of holding it. Maybe discuss this with her. A very tender age 4.
Everyone thought no health problem but its not a good idea to hold because it can raise the risk of bladder infections, this at any age.

iluvcats

I know you said she wasn't wetting the bed, but I can remember wearing diapers when I was 4 and wetting the bed. My parents were arguing and my mother was mean to me. My dad said she wanted me to be spanked for everything. They split up when I was 5. So maybe something is stressful at preschool? Did you call the pediatrician?

chadwick

i don't have any kids...

thanks