Weird people!

Heineken Helen

Think I have a stalker at work :oops: or at the very least a bloody competitive weirdo.

I work in a team of 6... it's the kinda work where we pretty much chat all day while we're doing it. There's one who's a very 'keeping up with the Jones' kinda person. Her kids go to a posh private school and I think she's used to their friends parents and having to compete but now she's bringing it into work and it's gone a bit weird.

A few weeks back, we went to the jewellery quarter and got our wedding rings. A few days later SHE went to the jewellery quarter to get earrings and made a big deal about it. I didn't think much of it at the time.

Anyway, we've all been chatting about what holidays we've booked or WILL book and I've been going on about the honeymoon in detail. She's never said anything about hers but been asking me plenty of questions and lots of 'oh that sounds brilliant' or 'you should...' blah blah blah. Anyway today it was only our team leader said something about me and her have big holidays booked, so I asked her where she's going.

She pretty much said the exact same thing we're doing for our honeymoon :shock:

but 'a full 17 days' and with more places thrown in. Bigger and better of course.

I actually felt sick... I mean how competitive does one have to be? The others were completely shocked. She even mentioned a couple of things that I'd only said over the past couple of days

Anyone else think it's a bit weird? :oops: I'm quite creeped out by the whole thing

pandora

Take it as a compliment. She must want to be like you. She's insecure in who she is. Just be kind and don't be creeped out, maybe a little sad for her though.

Heineken Helen

pandora wrote:

Take it as a compliment. She must want to be like you. She's insecure in who she is. Just be kind and don't be creeped out, maybe a little sad for her though.

I would be sad for her if she wasn't actually a nasty person :oops: . She used to make fun of Ireland and my accent when she started til I asked her to stop (which she did and apologised). But she also makes fun of people's weight and what they wear and stuff even though she used to be obese herself. It's a new level of nastiness.

pandora

Heineken Helen wrote:

pandora wrote:

Take it as a compliment. She must want to be like you. She's insecure in who she is. Just be kind and don't be creeped out, maybe a little sad for her though.

I would be sad for her if she wasn't actually a nasty person :oops: . She used to make fun of Ireland and my accent when she started til I asked her to stop (which she did and apologised). But she also makes fun of people's weight and what they wear and stuff even though she used to be obese herself. It's a new level of nastiness.

Who can make fun of a cool Irish accent? she's not too bright either I see.
I still say copying another is the highest form of compliment. Be sad for her if she is a nasty person, nasty people are unhappy people.

eyedclaar

You rang? Ahhh, I'm no weirder than the average man/bear weasel tamer... Carry on.

Heineken Helen

eyedclaar wrote:

You rang? Ahhh, I'm no weirder than the average man/bear weasel tamer... Carry on.

Hahaha... Ya sure?

Yeh, I know pandora... I can't be sad for somebody who uses their money or their mouth to put other people down though. Yep, it's pathetic but there's no need for it where we work and she's starting something completely unnecessary :oops:

justam

Heineken Helen wrote:

Think I have a stalker at work :oops: or at the very least a bloody competitive weirdo.

I work in a team of 6... it's the kinda work where we pretty much chat all day while we're doing it. There's one who's a very 'keeping up with the Jones' kinda person. Her kids go to a posh private school and I think she's used to their friends parents and having to compete but now she's bringing it into work and it's gone a bit weird.

A few weeks back, we went to the jewellery quarter and got our wedding rings. A few days later SHE went to the jewellery quarter to get earrings and made a big deal about it. I didn't think much of it at the time.

Anyway, we've all been chatting about what holidays we've booked or WILL book and I've been going on about the honeymoon in detail. She's never said anything about hers but been asking me plenty of questions and lots of 'oh that sounds brilliant' or 'you should...' blah blah blah. Anyway today it was only our team leader said something about me and her have big holidays booked, so I asked her where she's going.

She pretty much said the exact same thing we're doing for our honeymoon :shock:

but 'a full 17 days' and with more places thrown in. Bigger and better of course.

I actually felt sick... I mean how competitive does one have to be? The others were completely shocked. She even mentioned a couple of things that I'd only said over the past couple of days

Anyone else think it's a bit weird? :oops: I'm quite creeped out by the whole thing

Helen,

I'm with you. That's WEIRD!! :shock:

(But, significant.)

People like this try to copy people they want to be like. So, in a strange way, it tells you that she wants to be you.

And, Hmmm... not sure what you want to do with that!

Usually, when I realize people are doing stuff like that, it makes me want to NOT tell them anything that matters to me. That way they can't steal it or copy it.

She feels under you. Just take that for what it is. :eh:

Heineken Helen

justam wrote:

Helen,

I'm with you. That's WEIRD!! :shock:

(But, significant.)

People like this try to copy people they want to be like. So, in a strange way, it tells you that she wants to be you.

And, Hmmm... not sure what you want to do with that!

Usually, when I realize people are doing stuff like that, it makes me want to NOT tell them anything that matters to me. That way they can't steal it or copy it.

She feels under you. Just take that for what it is. :eh:

Thanks, I kinda got that as well :oops: but that's the problem now. I can't talk about anything we've planned for the honeymoon anymore :oops: . I can't talk about anything we're planning on doing as she'll just do it better and make a point of it. I know I should be bigger than that and just let it go over my head... but I don't feel comfortable having someone take everything I do and kinda make it theirs :oops: . A guy at work said that she's just raped all over my honeymoon :? which is obviously a bit extreme but it feels a little like that. She's pretty rich (or so she says) so they have the capacity to do everything we're doing but fancier... although I know she'll have her kids and her sad little life so there really should be no contest anyway, it just feels very creepy. Anyway I'll get over it soon, just feeling weirded out at the mo.

But then I could have a bit of fun with it and say we're going to places that we're definitely NOT going to... and see what happens

stardust1976

I'd just say what the others have said - that she is copying you because she feels insecure with who she is. She can't make something you are excited about, into something that is hers. Because as much as she can copy your plans, she can't copy who you are. Your thoughts, and your actions, your intent - they're all yours, and you will have your wedding and honeymoon and enjoy them because they are yours. You won't be thinking the whole time 'I wonder what so-and-so would be doing, would do in this situation'. You will be enjoying the moment and that's the difference. She can do what you do, but she can't BE you, and I'd say just try not to let it bother you too much, and take it as a compliment. If any of that actually makes sense - I know what I'm trying to say!!!

Heineken Helen

stardust1976 wrote:

I'd just say what the others have said - that she is copying you because she feels insecure with who she is. She can't make something you are excited about, into something that is hers. Because as much as she can copy your plans, she can't copy who you are. Your thoughts, and your actions, your intent - they're all yours, and you will have your wedding and honeymoon and enjoy them because they are yours. You won't be thinking the whole time 'I wonder what so-and-so would be doing, would do in this situation'. You will be enjoying the moment and that's the difference. She can do what you do, but she can't BE you, and I'd say just try not to let it bother you too much, and take it as a compliment. If any of that actually makes sense - I know what I'm trying to say!!!

Yeh, I know what ya mean. It's the whole secrecy behind it too... she knew she was doing something wrong... but thing is, if it wasn't for the secrecy it wouldn't really have been wrong.

At least she's going after me anyway .