The arrogance of the English speakers
nuffingman
Posts: 3,014
In the Turkish Electricity company offices a Turkish and English guy were having a heated discussion about bill payments. "I want to pay by direct debit, this is a bloody stupid way to have to pay, having to come in here every month" said the English guy. Not surprisingly the Turk didn't have a clue what he was going on about. I struggled as the English oik was a Geordie from Newcassle and all Brits know that Geordies don't speak English either. It made me think of the number of times I've witnessed English speaking tourists just walk into a bar or shop and expect Johnny Foreigner to understand what his blathering on about.
It's called.... arrogance! A lot of us expect them to understand every thing we say without making any effort to learn a few of their phrases. If I worked in a bar and a Spanish guy said "Dos cervezas, por favor" I'd order him a cab and send him back to the airport. But no, the chances are he'd speak better English than me.
And this is where I feel sorry for them. It seems wherever we travel the natives in huge numbers speak English, except America of course. It's not just international financiers and business execs, it's waiters, shopkeepers, bus drivers that will babble away all day. English must be a nightmare to learn which is why I think George Bush gave up. We have numerous words that mean the same thing and words that end in the same letters that sound differently. Cough, through, bough, tough, thorough. Madness!!! But we expect them to know it and can't be bothered to learn any of their languages.
There is however a nation that won't kow tow to the arrogance of the English speakers. A nation whose natives will give you a stare that can freeze magma at 30 paces, a shrug that says "fuck off" and a pfff sound expelled with vigor. The FRENCH! When I've asked a French waiter if he speaks English I half expect " I do but am not sure I want to!" delivered with a puffed out chest and a glare that would shrivel me to the size of a newt. And quite rightly so. So I learned a few French phrases and received a mocking smile.
A few years ago we went on holiday to a lovely village about 40 miles south of Poitier. On the 3rd day a farmer cut down a load of long grass in the field behind the cottage. Uh oh! Within an hour my wife had a hay fever attack. Being a time of year when she doesn't suffer in England she hadn't brought any of her medicine cabinet so I nipped down to the chemists. "Bonjour Madame" I said to the chic, slim lady behind the counter (well all French women are like this), "Bonjour Monsieur" she said and then I was lost. "Hayfever tablets?" I said. French shrug, raised eyebrows. So, I went to the tub of flowers outside the shop, shoved my face into them, took a loud sniff, dramatically sneezed and ran my fingers down my face to theatrically show tears. "Ah!!!, babble, babble, french words, french words" she said and handed me a plain box of tablets. I had no idea what they were but they could have been a new treatment for hemorrhoids. Fortunately an hour after my wife took one she said "the hayfever had gone" and not "I've still got the hayfever but my arse feels better".
2 days later after buying more bread than you can shake a stick at I walked past the chemists, where the chic lady was talking outside to another lady... in perfect English. She gave me a knowing smile. I just hope she had enjoyed my mime performance.
Dontcha just love the French!
So when you go to foreign countries learn some of the lingo to show respect.
If you go into a French restaurant and are greeted by the head waiter looking at you as if you are a slug he has just found in his salad, smile and say "Va te faire foutre, enculé". He'll greet you like along lost brother.
And if you jump in a Spanish cab just smile and say "bésame el culo". You'll be friends for life.
It's called.... arrogance! A lot of us expect them to understand every thing we say without making any effort to learn a few of their phrases. If I worked in a bar and a Spanish guy said "Dos cervezas, por favor" I'd order him a cab and send him back to the airport. But no, the chances are he'd speak better English than me.
And this is where I feel sorry for them. It seems wherever we travel the natives in huge numbers speak English, except America of course. It's not just international financiers and business execs, it's waiters, shopkeepers, bus drivers that will babble away all day. English must be a nightmare to learn which is why I think George Bush gave up. We have numerous words that mean the same thing and words that end in the same letters that sound differently. Cough, through, bough, tough, thorough. Madness!!! But we expect them to know it and can't be bothered to learn any of their languages.
There is however a nation that won't kow tow to the arrogance of the English speakers. A nation whose natives will give you a stare that can freeze magma at 30 paces, a shrug that says "fuck off" and a pfff sound expelled with vigor. The FRENCH! When I've asked a French waiter if he speaks English I half expect " I do but am not sure I want to!" delivered with a puffed out chest and a glare that would shrivel me to the size of a newt. And quite rightly so. So I learned a few French phrases and received a mocking smile.
A few years ago we went on holiday to a lovely village about 40 miles south of Poitier. On the 3rd day a farmer cut down a load of long grass in the field behind the cottage. Uh oh! Within an hour my wife had a hay fever attack. Being a time of year when she doesn't suffer in England she hadn't brought any of her medicine cabinet so I nipped down to the chemists. "Bonjour Madame" I said to the chic, slim lady behind the counter (well all French women are like this), "Bonjour Monsieur" she said and then I was lost. "Hayfever tablets?" I said. French shrug, raised eyebrows. So, I went to the tub of flowers outside the shop, shoved my face into them, took a loud sniff, dramatically sneezed and ran my fingers down my face to theatrically show tears. "Ah!!!, babble, babble, french words, french words" she said and handed me a plain box of tablets. I had no idea what they were but they could have been a new treatment for hemorrhoids. Fortunately an hour after my wife took one she said "the hayfever had gone" and not "I've still got the hayfever but my arse feels better".
2 days later after buying more bread than you can shake a stick at I walked past the chemists, where the chic lady was talking outside to another lady... in perfect English. She gave me a knowing smile. I just hope she had enjoyed my mime performance.
Dontcha just love the French!
So when you go to foreign countries learn some of the lingo to show respect.
If you go into a French restaurant and are greeted by the head waiter looking at you as if you are a slug he has just found in his salad, smile and say "Va te faire foutre, enculé". He'll greet you like along lost brother.
And if you jump in a Spanish cab just smile and say "bésame el culo". You'll be friends for life.
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Comments
You make a good point, but i like the way those Japanese girls squeal.
1. great post and totally agree
2. i learnt swahili just so i could buy some samosas on a train
3. this is way better than talking about shaving your armpits
whats the truster internet?
"Vinyl or not, you will need to pay someone to take RA of your hands" - Smile05
424, xxx
When I visited Germany, I thought my German was less than passable but people happily conversed with me and seemed to appreciate my efforts. Of course I also learned you can go a long way with "Bitte, sprechen Sie Englisch?"
never a truer post has been posted... all men around the world have to learn to say 2 beers please in every language, it's part of becoming a man... that and the wanking.
'Mein pimmel ist gros' is pretty much the only german i know...
i did french in school, but i've forgotten most of it :oops: :oops: i would like to do a refresher course one day i think
j’aime les françaises, et j’aime la France (et je suis americaine). l’arrogance, c’est à vous… vous avez dites c’est important à apprendre les langues des autres SAUF que le français. peut-être, ça c’est pourquoi les françaises ne vous parleront en anglais… parce que vous aviez parti du principe que les françaises doivent parler l’anglais.
The arrogance is mine. How dare you! I can ask for 2 beers in 4 languages.
As for the rest... exactly, we English speakers have often assumed foreigners can speak English. I have tried to speak in local languages often with comical results. I think the French woman was having a laugh with me though.
Hey! :evil: The French work really hard at that!
When you go to the shop, you say 'bonjour Monsieur/Madame' (like you did!), then you say 'Je ne parle pas bien le français. Parlez-vous un peu l'anglais? ' Then, if you're not dealing with a Parisian, they will be happy you tried to explain yourself and they might just speak to you in English!
An american friend of mine is always amazed at the french 'shrug' and flick of the hand to dismiss something. She says they do it with such class and art!
Fortunately I've used the "Parlez-vous l'anglais?" bit but admit not the "un peu". And of course when I say it, I receive the raised head, look down the nose and "well of course". I half expect "you silly man".
As for the French shrug, well you couldn't teach that to anyone.
I know... my mama passed this on to me along with the traditional nursery rhymes and local folk tales