Here's proof that hell doesn't exist

nuffingman

I received this today by email and even though I thought it was funny I was concerned as my wife is called Teresa.

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is a students answer to a chemistry question. Apparently he was given an A+


Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

the wolf

pearljim

LOL! This is a classic hahahahahahahahaha

BinauralJam

Your obviously NOT MARRIED

Kilgore_Trout

ha... solid logic

love when teachers can appreciate that kind of thing

Hammerdonkey

Although I find this young college student's test answer provocative, genius in its presentation, and incredibly entertaining, I take comfort in knowing that his youth will fade, the fog will lift, and he too will come join the rest of us in hell as he allows lust to cloud his judgement one evening, has unprotected sex, and impregnates a girl that he moderately likes...at best.

Hell does exist. Here on earth, it takes the form of a gold or silver circle and is located on the left ring finger of soulless men who struggle to make it through each day by holding on to memories of one night stands with good little whores like Teresa.

When I say Teresa, I'm referring to the girl in the fantasy story of hell, of course.

nuffingman

Hammerdonkey wrote:

Although I find this young college student's test answer provocative, genius in its presentation, and incredibly entertaining, I take comfort in knowing that his youth will fade, the fog will lift, and he too will come join the rest of us in hell as he allows lust to cloud his judgement one evening, has unprotected sex, and impregnates a girl that he moderately likes...at best.

Hell does exist. Here on earth, it takes the form of a gold or silver circle and is located on the left ring finger of soulless men who struggle to make it through each day by holding on to memories of one night stands with good little whores like Teresa.

When I say Teresa, I'm referring to the girl in the fantasy story of hell, of course.

Having a bad day????

Fifthelement

:think: :thumbup:

haffajappa

Hammerdonkey wrote:

Although I find this young college student's test answer provocative, genius in its presentation, and incredibly entertaining, I take comfort in knowing that his youth will fade, the fog will lift, and he too will come join the rest of us in hell as he allows lust to cloud his judgement one evening, has unprotected sex, and impregnates a girl that he moderately likes...at best.

Hell does exist. Here on earth, it takes the form of a gold or silver circle and is located on the left ring finger of soulless men who struggle to make it through each day by holding on to memories of one night stands with good little whores like Teresa.

When I say Teresa, I'm referring to the girl in the fantasy story of hell, of course.

lol some people actually would say this too!
"praise!"

dmftraveller

Hammerdonkey wrote:

Although I find this young college student's test answer provocative, genius in its presentation, and incredibly entertaining, I take comfort in knowing that his youth will fade, the fog will lift, and he too will come join the rest of us in hell as he allows lust to cloud his judgement one evening, has unprotected sex, and impregnates a girl that he moderately likes...at best.

Hell does exist. Here on earth, it takes the form of a gold or silver circle and is located on the left ring finger of soulless men who struggle to make it through each day by holding on to memories of one night stands with good little whores like Teresa.

When I say Teresa, I'm referring to the girl in the fantasy story of hell, of course.

And what exactly in that story suggests that Teresa is a whore? as opposed to being some college-aged girl who wanted to sleep with the male chemistry student? :?