What Causes Pearl Jam's Breakup?? Reviving an old THread....
YO YO YO...I was looking at old threads and found one that asked to post crazy ways the band would break up........I thought we could try again.....
1. Stone goes on a campaign to save Polar Bears and gets speared by Eskimos after he accidentally lands his solar-powered-flying-research-machine on the Chief's Igloo.
2. At the '08 Hermosa Beach show, Mike goes into an Even-Flow solo and has a seizure/trance that keeps him locked and soloing the song for the next twenty five years.
3. As Pearl Jam is in the studio and wrapping up their new album, titled "Meat", Jeff surprises the band. He decides that he needs to make up all the years of wearing hats and long socks by wearing hats and long socks, but nothing else. To make matters worse, he also elects to hold the bass very high on his chest, especially when jumping around on stage.
4. At a secret Santa Cruz show, Eddie passes out his bottle of wine to the crowd. While the bottle makes its rounds it ends up touching the lips of Sky "redwood" Henderson, a hippy that just dropped way too much acid. The bottle then makes its way right back to the stage and directly to Eddie. Within thirty minutes Eddie is sitting down and looking at the bassdrum while consulting his friend, the friendly talking Gluestick. The gluestick then convinces Ed to change his name to Grizzlebee von Barron and to write countless songs about a miniature giraffe named Herman, which he does for the next twenty years.
5. Matt jokingly claims that Boom wears a wig. Boom giggles as he walked out of the room, but, as he passed, Matt made the mistake to pull on the back of Boom's hair and ended up holding the wig as Boom pulverized him.
6. Boom leaves the band and it doesnt cause them to break up. Knowing this ahead of time, the band is left with not choice but to break up.
1. Stone goes on a campaign to save Polar Bears and gets speared by Eskimos after he accidentally lands his solar-powered-flying-research-machine on the Chief's Igloo.
2. At the '08 Hermosa Beach show, Mike goes into an Even-Flow solo and has a seizure/trance that keeps him locked and soloing the song for the next twenty five years.
3. As Pearl Jam is in the studio and wrapping up their new album, titled "Meat", Jeff surprises the band. He decides that he needs to make up all the years of wearing hats and long socks by wearing hats and long socks, but nothing else. To make matters worse, he also elects to hold the bass very high on his chest, especially when jumping around on stage.
4. At a secret Santa Cruz show, Eddie passes out his bottle of wine to the crowd. While the bottle makes its rounds it ends up touching the lips of Sky "redwood" Henderson, a hippy that just dropped way too much acid. The bottle then makes its way right back to the stage and directly to Eddie. Within thirty minutes Eddie is sitting down and looking at the bassdrum while consulting his friend, the friendly talking Gluestick. The gluestick then convinces Ed to change his name to Grizzlebee von Barron and to write countless songs about a miniature giraffe named Herman, which he does for the next twenty years.
5. Matt jokingly claims that Boom wears a wig. Boom giggles as he walked out of the room, but, as he passed, Matt made the mistake to pull on the back of Boom's hair and ended up holding the wig as Boom pulverized him.
6. Boom leaves the band and it doesnt cause them to break up. Knowing this ahead of time, the band is left with not choice but to break up.
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments
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LOL
2. At the '08 Hermosa Beach show, Mike goes into an Even-Flow solo and has a seizure/trance that keeps him locked and soloing the song for the next twenty five years.
- thats the best possible ending i think0 -
I think something crazy, like Ed doing the whole soundtrack for a movie, probably directed by Sean Penn, decides to go on a solo tour... the problem is the tour is only on the left coast, and this pisses Matt off!! Matt sees Ed at a bar behind Fenway Park and plunges a drum stick into his throat, thus ending that amazing voice... The rest of the band moves on with a new singer names Scott Stapp. During their first tour together, after a small ego argument between Scott and Matt, Matt accidentally sticks a drum stick into Jeff's arm pit, thus ending a great bass player career... Mike is so fueled by this, he stands directly on top of Matt and plays a nine hour solo until Matt was pronounced legally retarded... Mike and Stone fell in love, and quit music all together.... This left Boom... Boom is the current President of the United States." Jump from a cliff to fly, not to fall..."0
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simpleman wrote:I think something crazy, like Ed doing the whole soundtrack for a movie, probably directed by Sean Penn, decides to go on a solo tour... the problem is the tour is only on the left coast, and this pisses Matt off!! Matt sees Ed at a bar behind Fenway Park and plunges a drum stick into his throat, thus ending that amazing voice... The rest of the band moves on with a new singer names Scott Stapp. During their first tour together, after a small ego argument between Scott and Matt, Matt accidentally sticks a drum stick into Jeff's arm pit, thus ending a great bass player career... Mike is so fueled by this, he stands directly on top of Matt and plays a nine hour solo until Matt was pronounced legally retarded... Mike and Stone fell in love, and quit music all together.... This left Boom... Boom is the current President of the United States.
Hahahahahaha....legally retarded.........great band name....
Has anyone seen Scott Stapps wildebeest wife??0 -
Eddie, while watching Jack Irons enjoying vacation on one of Japan's beautiful beaches, saves his life from an inflatable Godzilla doll, only to take his own life to spare another.
Happiness is only real when shared0 -
The band gets older, they all have kids, Eddie wins a golden globe and goes Solo..Sorta like.....Now!0
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ed marries yoko ono and has a love in at some hotel for 25 yearsAUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE0
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Creed re-unites, and after releasing another groundbreaking, innovative alum, the band realizes that they are no longer significant and could never compared to Creed, thus breaking up.Pittsburgh 6/23/06
Madison Square Garden 6/25/080 -
While singing alive for the 671st time he changes the lyrics to "oh oh i wish i was dead" and walks off the stage.5/28/06, 6/27/08, 10/28/09, 5/18/10, 5/21/10
8/7/08, 6/9/090 -
The Band realizes that mistake they made in NOT doing the Viagra commercial. To make up for it, they invent a time machine and go back in time to fix the mistake. While there, George Bush realizes the error of his ways and names the entire band to his cabinet. They end the war, but when they get back around to the year 2008 they tell the current/old them to not go back into time because it is not a "green" thing to do. The band doesn't go back and when that decision is made all 10 of their current/past/present heads all explode at once. THE ENDPeace, Love, Pearl Jam
Alpine 98,00,03 TFC 99, Chicago 00,03,09(2X),23(2X) St. Louis 03, Champagne 03, St. Paul 03,06(2X),14,23(2X), Noblesville 03, Toledo 04, Grand Rapids 04,06, Thunder Bay 05, Cleveland 06, Lolla 07, Roo 08, PJ20 X2, Wrigley 13 & 16, Portland/Spokane/Seattle 13, Milwaukee 14, Fenway 18(2X),24(2X), Quebec City 22, Ottawa 22, MSG 24, Philly 24(2X), Auckland 24, Gold Coast 24, Nashville 250 -
Ed decides to run his own jam jarring company.*~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*0
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