Old Timer Sex!!
Irish Al
Posts: 6,236
Old Timers Sex
This is too funny to be dirty - enjoy!
The husband leans over and asks his wife,
'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?
We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.'
'Yes', she says, 'I remember it well.'
'OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?'
'Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!'
A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation
and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence.
I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble.
So he follows them..
The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks..
Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence..
The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers.
As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in..
Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen.
This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises
and moaning and screaming.
Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.
The policeman is amazed.
He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.
After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering,
the old couple struggles to their feet and puts their clothes back on.
The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself,
this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.
So, as the couple passes, he says to them,
'Excuse me, but that was something else.
You must've had a fantastic sex life together.
Is there some sort of secret to this?'
Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,
'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence
This is too funny to be dirty - enjoy!
The husband leans over and asks his wife,
'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?
We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.'
'Yes', she says, 'I remember it well.'
'OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?'
'Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!'
A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation
and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence.
I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble.
So he follows them..
The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks..
Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence..
The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers.
As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in..
Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen.
This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises
and moaning and screaming.
Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.
The policeman is amazed.
He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.
After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering,
the old couple struggles to their feet and puts their clothes back on.
The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself,
this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.
So, as the couple passes, he says to them,
'Excuse me, but that was something else.
You must've had a fantastic sex life together.
Is there some sort of secret to this?'
Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,
'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence
I need a coffee!
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments
Nice one Al!!!!!!
Cheers matey..hope alls well with the clan
Peace
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
<img src="http://i740.photobucket.com/albums/xx46/tremors25/thrillafixterorange.gif" align="left">
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All's well Al! Hope life in Eire is filled with cheer!
Slainte!
Yup
Ah the country is fucked and I just got a pay cut but hey..I have me health, beautifully rugged good looks, healthy family and you lot of fellow nutjobs....life couldnt be better
By the way...tell me you're "going out for milk love" this summer and coming to see the lads in the home land???
Ah kid you know if I could pull that off I would. I even told the wife about the shows and she was ready to pack and get on board Aer Lingus! I have started, however, practicing my shots of Jamesons and Paddy's for St. Patrick's Day. It's never too early to start practicing!!!!!!!!!!
You comin over for paddys day??
So can I take it that you comin over for the gig is a "Maybe"
I hope it was a good one cause as we all know its the last time you saw your penis connected to your body :shock:
No plans to come to Eire, but will be practicing just in case!!!!!!!!
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
Reminds me of this one:
An 80 years old woman is feeling frisky so she dolls herself up and puts on a sexy nighty and yells downstairs to her husband “How about some super sex?”
After thinking a moment he yells back.............."I’ll take the soup!”
Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
I'm printing this out and sticking it to my fridge, so when I get Demensia I will " remember" this TIP!
On their wedding night, they're about to sleep with each other for the first time. After the old lady slowly pulls up her top to reveal her breasts, that gravity has had the better of, she says to her husband that she needs to tell him something.
'I forgot to tell you, but I have acute angina'
The husband, hard of hearing replies 'Whaaat? you've gotta speak up'
She says louder, 'I have acute angina'
The husband replies, 'That's good, makes up for your saggy breasts'
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