How to deal with long-distance (even for a short time)?
duggro
Posts: 1,343
Been with my lovely girlfriend for almost a year now, and I spend pretty much every day and night with her and love every minute of it.
Come january, i am doing a 3 mth placement with work back in my hometown. this will be nice as it'll mean i can be around my family and friends, and i'll save a ton of cash, but it means i will only get to see my girlfriend at weekends, or every 2nd weekend.
May sound pitiful as it's only for 3 months, but it suddenly hit me today how gutted i am gonna be when she isn't around all the time. suppose it's harder because i'm spoiled at the moment and we live/work so close to each other.
Any strategies?
Come january, i am doing a 3 mth placement with work back in my hometown. this will be nice as it'll mean i can be around my family and friends, and i'll save a ton of cash, but it means i will only get to see my girlfriend at weekends, or every 2nd weekend.
May sound pitiful as it's only for 3 months, but it suddenly hit me today how gutted i am gonna be when she isn't around all the time. suppose it's harder because i'm spoiled at the moment and we live/work so close to each other.
Any strategies?
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what to you have kids...(not with her) kids are harder to leave behind.
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The only thing that you gotta keep in mind, is you are going home where you know everyone. If she can be the jealous type, it will come out. She can imagine you going out with your friends and having fun, and on those nights where she is sitting home, she might get mad or jealous... especially if there are girls in your group of friends that you go out with.
In our situation, everything worked out and 5 years later we are still together (married for 3 years), but there were some times during that period away with a lot of fights and frustrated moments.
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
3 months?
seriously, it'll FLY by!
and i agree with whomever posted that you'll love her more after it all. well maybe not "more"...but the appreciation will be stronger. i know i was away from my husband for 6 weeks back in 2005, - and i loved my study-trip! - but it was totally awesome coming home.
just sayin'.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
just send her random pics of your junk !!!
serious though. I used to be like that with my ex wife, and even my gf for the first year or so.
i had some serious seperation issues that had to do with trust blah blah blah.
now, it would suck, but i could deal with it I think.
so long as sexting was involved !!
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
i'm in a LD relationship ... 3 months is nothing ... assuming your life isn't all about your relationship with her - you should be ok ...
I'm not trying to downplay your situation AT ALL, but my girlfriend and myself spent 1.5 years apart and we hung in there and are now living together again...
It gets tough at times, I won't lie...but ultimately it's weighed out by how much the relationship means to you, ya know? If you want it bad enough, you'll probably do whatever it takes to see you through. If you're only semi into it, then you'll probably only be semi-dedicated to making it work.
Good luck, and don't listen to anyone when they tell you long distance relationships don't work. Nothing is stronger than true love between two people.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder...
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww........
(seriously, i do agree)
i do think, nowadays, doing the long distance thing is a LOT easier than any other time period in history simply due to all the technology available for keeping in touch, instantly. definitely makes a big difference.
you can do it duggro!
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
This is definitely a potential problem. You may want to consider having a heart to heart about where you guys stand on trust in hopes of avoiding any negative interactions that could result from not being on the same level if you haven't already.
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Great point. Think of the times as being to your advantage. I often cheered myself up by thinking about how hard it was had we been doing what we were doing in say, the 80's...when cell phones, and networking and such weren't even close to being as popular as they are today.
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
put on a slow, dumb show for you
and crack you up
so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
god I'm very, very frightening
and I'll overdo it'
A good dose of this might help too.
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
As for advice, Skype is definitely a great tool in keeping in touch..It's free from Skype to Skype and it's dirt cheap for long distance calls.. Thank goodness for technology and the internet..Other than that, as with any relationship, trust is everything..It's all about what is in both of your hearts..Times like these will define the relationship and can definitely make it stronger..
Good luck amigo!
Exactly!!!.....a Good ole' 'NIGHTLY' Clear of the "PIPES" didn't do anyone ANY Harm!...PMSL :P :P :P
That term makes me think of the scene in "Somehing About Mary" where Ben Stiller gets some...hair gel, on his ear!
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Kathy only wishes I would move out for 3 months.......
hehehehehehehehe
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
Haha..sometimes I feel like I'm getting the same vibes from Jen.
"Would you just fucking go out have a guys night out or something?!"
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Even the cat wakes up in the morning and gives Kathy and I a look, as if to say....
"Great, you 2 idiots are still here"???
hehehehehe
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
I wish it was like that sometimes with my two dogs. Instead, I wake up to them standing over me staring at me like a stalker watching someone sleep. I can't even sleep in on the weeknds, those little shits.
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Great clip
put on a slow, dumb show for you
and crack you up
so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
god I'm very, very frightening
and I'll overdo it'
My best friend's boyfriend has been at school in Alberta for 3-4 months at a time (over a period of about 2 years) and I know she struggles with it, but she says it makes it 100x better when you see the other person again because everything seems new and exciting again. I think in this day and age its easier, she uses skype a lot to talk to him via webcam...
Really if you can get through that, you can get through anything.
Just keep communicating using the means that we have.... at least its not telegram. stop. !
now and it's still wonderful
I think it's a good test of a relationship... tough at times certainly and can be financially draining... but you'll certainly know if you two are good for eachother by the end of it and yep, it does seem to keep things fresh and exciting.
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
You'll get through it.
i think it'll be fine. hard, but we can easily make it work.
i count myself lucky that it's only for 3 months