Wallowing in self pity

_Crazy_Mary_

Do you ever feel like things couldn't possibly get any worse? I feel like right now I'm at an all-time low in my life and it couldn't get any worse so things can only get better. But just to stay on the safe side I remind myself that it could get worse:
My husband & kids could be in a car accident.
A tree could fall on my house.
I could run a pedestrian over.
I could lose my job.
My house could burn up.
So even though my oldest daughter was molested & is now in foster care & most likely has a mental disorder & I'm pregnant & I work 6 days a week but have little money for Christmas, I have to look on the bright side, things could be so much worse.

decides2dream

things can always be worse, you bet. but hell, i think it perfectly justifiable, even healthy, to wallow in some self-pity for a while. sometimes it's necessary. sounds like you've got some serious shit on your plate mary, and for that i am truly sorry to read. i hope your oldest daughter will be ok, that you and all your family will be ok....and your future beautiful child will be such a blessing in your life. so go and wallow, and then sure...count the blessings you do still have. and hey, christmas is all about being together, not $$$....so try to find your peace and joy in there.

musicismylife78

self doubt and self pity, pretty much sums up my life in my twenties.

quit job, cause I couldnt get good hours

Cant find any job, right now

Money running out, have apartment, what will happen if money runs out?

Black73

Crazy Mary - a wise friend told me that you're entitled to feel sorry for yourself 30 minutes each day, so long as you spend the other 23 1/2 hours taking charge and making the most of your situation. So with that, take a good long deep breath, and get to loving those present and future kids...play 'em both some Pearl Jam and let the healing begin.

Claireack

Crazy mary - sounds like you're having a crap time at the moment, been down there, hang on in there, don't feel bad for feeling bad, it makes it worse.

Things will improve it just takes time. Talk, talk and talk some more, I find it helps.

Take care.

Heineken Helen

decides2dream wrote:

things can always be worse, you bet. but hell, i think it perfectly justifiable, even healthy, to wallow in some self-pity for a while. sometimes it's necessary. sounds like you've got some serious shit on your plate mary, and for that i am truly sorry to read. i hope your oldest daughter will be ok, that you and all your family will be ok....and your future beautiful child will be such a blessing in your life. so go and wallow, and then sure...count the blessings you do still have. and hey, christmas is all about being together, not $$$....so try to find your peace and joy in there.

Yep... wow CM... I'm so sorry to read this. That's not just a bad day, that's some seriously tough times that I can't even imagine. I hope things get easier for you and your family soon :(

Thoughts_Arrive

There is always someone out there in a worse position than you.
But still, doesn't help knowing that at times.

Ledbetterman10

_Crazy_Mary_ wrote:

Do you ever feel like things couldn't possibly get any worse? I feel like right now I'm at an all-time low in my life and it couldn't get any worse so things can only get better. But just to stay on the safe side I remind myself that it could get worse:
My husband & kids could be in a car accident.
A tree could fall on my house.
I could run a pedestrian over.
I could lose my job.
My house could burn up.
So even though my oldest daughter was molested & is now in foster care & most likely has a mental disorder & I'm pregnant & I work 6 days a week but have little money for Christmas, I have to look on the bright side, things could be so much worse.

Sorry to hear this. Hopefully everything turns out okay.

All I could do for ya is post this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo

mca47

I have an ex-girlfriend who loved pity.
Her life "sucked", and no matter what happened, it wasn't good enough to make her happy.
Even those times she seemed happy and things WERE going good, she was looking and waiting for the next bad thing to happen....as a result, she NEVER was happy.


It is IMO, a psychological condition that needs help. I can't imagine how horrible that has to be!

i_lov_it

Well...My ~LIFE~ DIDN'T exactly go to PLAN!...So to DEAL with IT!...I just SLEEP ALLLLLL Day!!!...Except for today I woke up at 9am...PMSL :P

Thoughts_Arrive

Funny as I open this thread 'Down' starts playing from the other room, listening to the Sydney bootleg

missisles

Black73 wrote:

Crazy Mary - a wise friend told me that you're entitled to feel sorry for yourself 30 minutes each day, so long as you spend the other 23 1/2 hours taking charge and making the most of your situation. So with that, take a good long deep breath, and get to loving those present and future kids...play 'em both some Pearl Jam and let the healing begin.

can you save them all up and just spend a day feeling sorry for yourself?

Who Princess

Ledbetterman10 wrote:

All I could do for ya is post this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo

I wondered how long it would take before somebody posted that. :roll:

Crazy Mary, just because things could be worse doesn't mean that things couldn't stand to be better for you.
You have a lot to handle right now but maybe you can try remembering other times when you were under a lot of pressure.
What helped you to get through those times? Would it help you now?
If you've gotten through tough times before, then you can do it again, especially if you surround yourself with people who care about you.

I know all this may sound hoky, but when I get really down this is what helps me to pick myself back up.

skippybrew

Someone told me, "It'll all be okay in the end, so if it's not okay, it's not the end." Sounds pretty fucking trite, but it's helped me through some hard times. Try not to stew too much on what else could go wrong or it'll just grind you down even more.

It was brave of you to post this. Thank you for sharing. I think everyone here is pulling for you.

blackredyellow

mca47 wrote:

I have an ex-girlfriend who loved pity.
Her life "sucked", and no matter what happened, it wasn't good enough to make her happy.
Even those times she seemed happy and things WERE going good, she was looking and waiting for the next bad thing to happen....as a result, she NEVER was happy.


It is IMO, a psychological condition that needs help. I can't imagine how horrible that has to be!

Good thing for you that she's an "ex". Those types of people suck the life out of those who are around them.


But times of self pity are what the are, and as someone pointed out, sometimes necessary. I am a pretty optimistic person by nature and believe that everything will work out... Sounds vague and things always don't work out as planned, by they always work out somehow and we move on with our lives.

81

musicismylife78 wrote:

self doubt and self pity, pretty much sums up my life in my twenties.

quit job, cause I couldnt get good hours

Cant find any job, right now

Money running out, have apartment, what will happen if money runs out?

but you got to see PJ in seattle :roll:

Thoughts_Arrive

lol

_Crazy_Mary_

Wow. Thanks to all of you for your kind words. I feel encouraged. I also feel like I'm allowed to feel sorry for myself (even if just for the half hour a day) and having that 'permission' makes it so much better!

he.who.forgets

It's funny, I often times turn to the PJ family when times are tough and they always seem to cheer me up. I cant imagine what you're going through but just remember that things always turn around. Appreciate the beauty in your everday life, no matter how small, and the beautiful things will eventually and certainly outshine the ugly things. Here's to hoping that tomorrow is a better day!

Hammerdonkey

Listen here goddammit.....losing a spouse isn't the worst thing that can hapen to you.

What? I'm just saying...

Anyway, wives are great.

Carry on with your self-loathing. Just think, you could have been born BostonLou. Look at that poor son of a bitch now. He can't even get access to any website on the internet. Such a shame to lose all that grammatical talent.