I'm sorry about the joke, that doesn't really start a good discussion.
I wouldn't like it if my partner confided in someone else. Did you ask her why she was doing that?
The Joke I can handle...I'm Australian we like sarcasm and Jokes...just the rest of the part which was really uncalled for...
I did call her up on it...but She couldn't give me a Straight answer...it just really hurt me...because your Partner shouldn't be treating you that way...
I have had partners who didn't confide in me so much. It does really hurt when you aren't the go-to confidant with the person who means the most to you. I just hope that you can keep up the search until you find someone with whom you can share that kind of intimacy. Are you going to be okay?
Why would your Partner get another Guy a Birthday Present on the same day of his Birthday and yet get yours a week later?...the same guy who She claims is 'Funny' and who 'She likes'...also the same Guy who she spoke with about her exam behind my back???...also the same Guy she was messaging half of the time when we were having romantic time together...
Do you think there's anything you can do - for your own sake - to let some of this go? I ask only because you've mentioned it many times recently, and I know how toxic it can be to cling to personal baggage vs. finding a way to release it...to set yourself free of its weight, even bit by bit. I hope you can find that place, and more importantly, your peace.
Thank you for your advice Hedo...it took me awhile to realise it...it's not easy I mean at the time you try to ignore it and push it to the side...I mean She didn't even get me a Birthday Present last year...and on top of this talking to some Guy behind my back about an important Exam and yet not me...and messaging that same Guy while we're having romantic time together...I suppose I got my answer then doesn't make it easy though...
I'm with Hedo, I don't think bringing it up here and cross-posting on multiple threads is healthy for you. I understand you're trying to process the breakdown of this relationship but I don't think rehashing all the ways she mistreated you is going to help you move on. Clearly you're better off without her and you know that now, so don't let her take up so much of your headspace
Thank you for your Good advice...it's actually helped me a lot...I just can't believe I was stupid enough to be Fooled by her...
Love often makes people do stupid things. It's a fact for billions of people. Don't be so hard on yourself!
You mean even if it means being used...strung along and being played for a fool?
I know what you mean...and ok I will try...it's not easy though...thanks for your kind words
Yes, even then. It's not a crime to let love blind you to some mistreatment. It's called wearing rose coloured glasses and/or ignoring red flags, and lots of people fall victim to this. I know I have. It's just human of you. The good thing is that with each mistake like this, you learn a lesson and bring it into your next relationship. Every relationship is a learning experience. So just think of it like that, and maybe you won't feel so bad. Seriously, stop beating yourself up about it. She's the one who did something wrong, not you!
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
Dude, she made a joke and then asked a legit question respectfully. It seems unfair to put your reaction on her.
Based on the many posts you've made about your ex, perhaps you tend to dwell on certain things, words, actions? All of this could be a wonderful opportunity to learn about yourself.
Just a friendly suggestion.
I appreciate your input Hedo...but it seemed to put a mockery on it...I mean how would She like it if her Partner confided in some one else about a Serious matter???
So having your Partner confide in you instead of someone else is being obsessive???...wtf???...and that's a Serious Question?
To be totally serious... I don't know how jealous you were before she spoke to someone else about an exam, but word to the wise: a woman can confide in whomever she likes, and women have more than one reason to confide in someone other than their partner, and most of them are not nefarious reasons. Perhaps you had a good reason to not trust her, and it sounds like it was a bad relationship either way, but the way you're hung up on her talking to another person about something... I just hope you're not going to carry this to future relationships, where you think your GF can't confide in other people when she sees fit, particularly when it's not something personal and confidential... you know, like an exam. Doing that and being unfaithful are often two very different things. It is NEVER good in a relationship when someone starts feeling possessive.
Post edited by PJ_Soul on
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
Why would your Partner get another Guy a Birthday Present on the same day of his Birthday and yet get yours a week later?...the same guy who She claims is 'Funny' and who 'She likes'...also the same Guy who she spoke with about her exam behind my back???...also the same Guy she was messaging half of the time when we were having romantic time together...
Do you think there's anything you can do - for your own sake - to let some of this go? I ask only because you've mentioned it many times recently, and I know how toxic it can be to cling to personal baggage vs. finding a way to release it...to set yourself free of its weight, even bit by bit. I hope you can find that place, and more importantly, your peace.
Thank you for your advice Hedo...it took me awhile to realise it...it's not easy I mean at the time you try to ignore it and push it to the side...I mean She didn't even get me a Birthday Present last year...and on top of this talking to some Guy behind my back about an important Exam and yet not me...and messaging that same Guy while we're having romantic time together...I suppose I got my answer then doesn't make it easy though...
I'm with Hedo, I don't think bringing it up here and cross-posting on multiple threads is healthy for you. I understand you're trying to process the breakdown of this relationship but I don't think rehashing all the ways she mistreated you is going to help you move on. Clearly you're better off without her and you know that now, so don't let her take up so much of your headspace
Thank you for your Good advice...it's actually helped me a lot...I just can't believe I was stupid enough to be Fooled by her...
Love often makes people do stupid things. It's a fact for billions of people. Don't be so hard on yourself!
You mean even if it means being used...strung along and being played for a fool?
I know what you mean...and ok I will try...it's not easy though...thanks for your kind words
Yes, even then. It's not a crime to let love blind you to some mistreatment. It's called wearing rose coloured glasses and/or ignoring red flags, and lots of people fall victim to this. I know I have. It's just human of you. The good thing is that with each mistake like this, you learn a lesson and bring it into your next relationship. Every relationship is a learning experience. So just think of it like that, and maybe you won't feel so bad. Seriously, stop beating yourself up about it. She's the one who did something wrong, not you!
Thank you for your great advice PJ_Soul I really appreciate it...very well said too
Dude, she made a joke and then asked a legit question respectfully. It seems unfair to put your reaction on her.
Based on the many posts you've made about your ex, perhaps you tend to dwell on certain things, words, actions? All of this could be a wonderful opportunity to learn about yourself.
Just a friendly suggestion.
I appreciate your input Hedo...but it seemed to put a mockery on it...I mean how would She like it if her Partner confided in some one else about a Serious matter???
So having your Partner confide in you instead of someone else is being obsessive???...wtf???...and that's a Serious Question?
no, being obsessive is posting the same vague, possibly minor, details over and over and over again here. that's all.
"Oh Canada...you're beautiful when you're drunk" -EV 8/14/93
26 minutes until I can go home and open the fridge to know that my life is worth
Once you hold the hand of love, it's all surmountable EV SOLO (May 7th 2014) || SÃO PAULO (November 15th 2015) || BELO HORIZONTE (November 20th 2015) || LOLLAPALOOZA 2018 || EV SOLO (March 29th 2018)
Comments
I wouldn't like it if my partner confided in someone else. Did you ask her why she was doing that?
The Joke I can handle...I'm Australian we like sarcasm and Jokes...just the rest of the part which was really uncalled for...
I did call her up on it...but She couldn't give me a Straight answer...it just really hurt me...because your Partner shouldn't be treating you that way...
You never really had to begin with.
Sometimes it's not the song that makes you emotional it's the people and things that come to your mind when you hear it.
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.
I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
You never really had to begin with.
Sometimes it's not the song that makes you emotional it's the people and things that come to your mind when you hear it.
-EV 8/14/93
And if he were to lower his standards enough to like one these bands, he'd have to do so ironically.
EV SOLO (May 7th 2014) || SÃO PAULO (November 15th 2015) || BELO HORIZONTE (November 20th 2015) || LOLLAPALOOZA 2018 || EV SOLO (March 29th 2018)
Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.
I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
Forza bianconeri till next time!!!!
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
....or, in LA, pffft to the months of June to October
(Purple / lavender blooms coming here soon! For some reason, their scent precedes their physical / visual presence, which in itself is...WOW.)