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Sad? Cry? I don't know what to call this....
Thorns2010
Posts: 2,199
White Knight? Hahahahahaha
I just might be a Black Knight
All that I know, and all that I feel
Is that a change is coming
May I rise above that which I hate?
That which I fear to become?
That which I fear to do?
Or shall I take the different path?
One that I’ve never taken before
But I know that coming soon
Coming closer than I’d like to admit
Is a choice
To fall by the wayside
Or to rise up and fight
Fight for what I want
For what I want to be
Funny how I sit here and wonder
Why things never seem to change for me
But if you keep doing the same thing
Day after day……..
How are things going to change?
I have a choice to make
And I finally believe
Finally think I will
Make the right one
To bring me higher than I’ve ever been
To finally make you proud of me
My only regret is that you aren’t here to see it
Maybe high above in Heaven watching down….
But alas, you know me, I’ve never believed in Heaven
But…..maybe this time…….
Knowing that you are out there….
Watching from wherever you are
I’m made great steps to change
To make my life better
Oh…..how I wish to talk to you again
Taken from me far to soon…..
I am what I’ve always been….
But mommy…how I wish you were here right now
To speak to, to talk to
To ask you all the questions I still hold in my mind
To have you tell me everything is going to be ok
To tell me that I’ve been a good person
That I’ve made the right choices
That I’ve chosen the right life to live
Neither there, nor then, but here
In the now and present
How I lie awake at night
Thinking of how you think of me
Did I disappoint you?
Even before you were gone…
I’ve asked that question daily
Are you proud of me??
I know you can’t answer that now
And even with you here…..
I don’t think….don’t think I could have asked
Why have I felt, in my own mind at the least
A failure…
To you, and to dad, and to my brothers
I know I was meant for something
Something better than……this….
Why am I alone?
No one here, nor there to hear my cries out into the night
It’s been that way since I was a young child
It wasn’t anything you did
Just, alone….
No one understands who I am
What I am
What I fear
What I love
What I would die for
Not even you would understand
I just have to remind myself of that thought
I miss you ohh so much
Which is humorous to me, to a certain extent
Never saw eye to eye
But yet…….
Without you here
I feel lost……
I love you
And I miss you everyday
And I promise that at the end of the day…..at the end of my life
At some point, at some time…
I will make you proud to call me son
I just might be a Black Knight
All that I know, and all that I feel
Is that a change is coming
May I rise above that which I hate?
That which I fear to become?
That which I fear to do?
Or shall I take the different path?
One that I’ve never taken before
But I know that coming soon
Coming closer than I’d like to admit
Is a choice
To fall by the wayside
Or to rise up and fight
Fight for what I want
For what I want to be
Funny how I sit here and wonder
Why things never seem to change for me
But if you keep doing the same thing
Day after day……..
How are things going to change?
I have a choice to make
And I finally believe
Finally think I will
Make the right one
To bring me higher than I’ve ever been
To finally make you proud of me
My only regret is that you aren’t here to see it
Maybe high above in Heaven watching down….
But alas, you know me, I’ve never believed in Heaven
But…..maybe this time…….
Knowing that you are out there….
Watching from wherever you are
I’m made great steps to change
To make my life better
Oh…..how I wish to talk to you again
Taken from me far to soon…..
I am what I’ve always been….
But mommy…how I wish you were here right now
To speak to, to talk to
To ask you all the questions I still hold in my mind
To have you tell me everything is going to be ok
To tell me that I’ve been a good person
That I’ve made the right choices
That I’ve chosen the right life to live
Neither there, nor then, but here
In the now and present
How I lie awake at night
Thinking of how you think of me
Did I disappoint you?
Even before you were gone…
I’ve asked that question daily
Are you proud of me??
I know you can’t answer that now
And even with you here…..
I don’t think….don’t think I could have asked
Why have I felt, in my own mind at the least
A failure…
To you, and to dad, and to my brothers
I know I was meant for something
Something better than……this….
Why am I alone?
No one here, nor there to hear my cries out into the night
It’s been that way since I was a young child
It wasn’t anything you did
Just, alone….
No one understands who I am
What I am
What I fear
What I love
What I would die for
Not even you would understand
I just have to remind myself of that thought
I miss you ohh so much
Which is humorous to me, to a certain extent
Never saw eye to eye
But yet…….
Without you here
I feel lost……
I love you
And I miss you everyday
And I promise that at the end of the day…..at the end of my life
At some point, at some time…
I will make you proud to call me son
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Comments
That was beautiful. To have those thoughts and feel the way you do....I'm sure your Mother was already proud of you.
want to be enlightened"
not just because of this beautiful poem
but also the beautiful soul that created it
peace
"what a long, strange trip it's been"