What inspired you to write today?

Ms. Haiku

I read some Pablo Neruda poetry for the first time in probably a year. I've been so focused on knitting, and then reading fiction/non-fiction that I don't remember when I last wrote a poem. Ahhhhhhh! It was such a good feeling to read poetry again, like eating butter on bread that just came out of the oven.

mfc2006

my wife inspired me to write a new tune today.

the wolf

feeling very un-inspired today. so as of right now, i got nothing.

we'll see what happens when i get home and pick up my guitar.

JOEJOEJOE

Laryngitis

SD533

What inspired me to write today: The same thing that has colored and flavored the waking and dreaming hours of each day for the past year - not knowing for sure how much time and how many chances I'll have to say my goodbyes and farewell's to all that I've come to know as my life. I had been having sporadic knife pounded into my head by sledge hammer headaches and loss of feeling in my left side extremities for about a year when I decided to have the situation checked out last August. A tennis ball sized cyst made up of Grade IV maignant cancer was crushing the right side of my brain. The on-call emergency room surgeon that was there when I went in was afraid to cut anything lest it caused blindness, paralysis or death. They drained the contents of the cyst made up of dead cancer cells and cancer proteins, leading me to believe that my body had been fighting the cancer for years. They left the collapsed bag made of cancer in my head and put me through 41 days of chemotherapy and radiation in an attempt to stop it. At the end of that the bag filled up again and it was bigger than it was before. Fearing for my life another surgeon went back in there and cut the whole thing out along with some smaller tumors they found behind my eye underneath the large tumor, and for whatever reason the surgeon decided to whack out an icecream scooper sized chunk out of my brain because I supposedly didn't need it, and it was probably already necroticized from the radiation. After that I did 6 rounds of maintenance chemotherapy - I took the poison at triple the earlier dose for 5 days and then had 23 days off to recover for the next round. After finishing that last month they discovered a new tumor getting started. This week they had me in there for an inquisition styled procedure called gamma knife surgery - I was given the same amount of radiation in 40 minutes that it took them 10 days to shoot into my head last fall. When this started I was given 18 months on the low end and 4 years if I was one of the lucky and rare 20% that managed to live that long - that was from time of diagnosis and not counting the year I pissed away by not doing anything. I always thought that I would have more time and have a chance to tell my story before my time was up and out. Now I'm trying to use whatever time I have to say what I have to say while the time is still here. That's what inspired me to write today - emails to old friends that I've relocated out in cyberspace, haikus based on song titles and lyrics from Pearl Jam tunes, and posting pages on this board from an old writing project that I let die and almost killed without anybody seeing it 10 years ago. I'm hoping that one day I'll be able to say that I never lived until I almost died - I know that somebody else said that in a song but I think that memory must have been stored in the part of my brain that was removed, or I have to jump that ditch in my brain to find out where I put that( "to live you must nearly die/ giving up the need to say I"). Thanks for letting me vent, and I'm sorry for clogging this board with my threads. I enjoy reading everybody's writing on this board and I'm impressed by the guitar players that can turn their words into songs.

The song that I was trying to find up there just called in - It's "Look To Your Soul" by Johnny Rivers from the Realization album - it was like 1969 and Johnny Rivers did a bunch of acid and made a record - the great song "Summer Rain" is on there along with a cover of "Whiter Shade of Pale", his version of Dylan's "Positively 4th Street" might have been on this album also if my memory is still operating correctly.

Over and out.

CHANGEinWAVES

Being so close....but still nothing's changed.

mfc2006

great post, SD. i hope that the treatments take hold...you'll be in my thoughts. hope you start feeling better soon.

the wolf

keep writing SD, i enjoy reading your posts. keep fighting the good fight too.

peace.

lobb152

bitterness

coachchris

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TF91KL25PYg

Ms. Haiku

The fact that I can!

DangDang

It was either that or ........cut my hair.

mfc2006

a new collaboration with a new friend

Ms. Haiku

Tim Winton's Cloudstreet

BhagavadGita

I love Pablo! So beautiful his work...

Today and many days I am inspired by Rumi. An ancient mystic Sufi.

"All day i think about it, then at night I say it. Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing? My soul is from elsewhere, I'm sure of that, and I intend to end up there. The drunkeness began in some other tavern. When I get back to that place, I'll be completely sober. Meanwhile, who is it in my ear? Who hears my voice? Who says words with my mouth? Who looks out with my eyes? What is the soul? I cannot stop asking. If i could take one sip of the answer, I could break out of this prison for drunks. I didn't come here of my own accord, and I can't leave that way. Whoever brought me here will have to take me home. - Rumi"

....how i wish i could express myself in this way.

catefrances

Ms. Haiku wrote:

Tim Winton's Cloudstreet

i fell so in love with this book when i read it recently. twas a case of things so close you that you think youll get to them one day but right now ive got other things and other authors that need reading. being an australian, though admittedly an east coast australian to wintons west coast australian(sometimes it may as well be another country), so many things spoke to me. i truly love tim wntons writing and have just finished reading an open swimmer. and i will not stop until ive read him all. breath is next.

have you read dirt music?

Ms. Haiku

catefrances wrote:

Ms. Haiku wrote:

Tim Winton's Cloudstreet

i fell so in love with this book when i read it recently. twas a case of things so close you that you think youll get to them one day but right now ive got other things and other authors that need reading. being an australian, though admittedly an east coast australian to wintons west coast australian(sometimes it may as well be another country), so many things spoke to me. i truly love tim wntons writing and have just finished reading an open swimmer. and i will not stop until ive read him all. breath is next.

have you read dirt music?

Yep, read Dirt Music, and I'm looking foward to reading other books he wrote. I hear The Riders is really good.

the wolf

this inspired me to write today.

everyone should read this IMO

viewtopic.php?f=10&t=107810

Ms. Haiku

This morning it was that buzz buzz buzz summer sound that gets louder then softer then louder then softer, and I can't see where the bugs are that are doing it, and the only things moving are the trees. I was a captive audience.

justam

Ms. Haiku wrote:

This morning it was that buzz buzz buzz summer sound that gets louder then softer then louder then softer, and I can't see where the bugs are that are doing it, and the only things moving are the trees. I was a captive audience.

I wonder what they look like too.