and the liquor speaks

CHANGEinWAVES

"hello" she says and listens for the man on the line
his sigh and tone reveal all that she holds inside
for she is not where she thought she'd be
his voice was familiar but nothing was the same
and that's where there came pain
somethings can change
somethings can evolve
somethings can linger
but inside it all remains the same
hidden from view disguised as healed
all it takes is a crack and it can all burst open
spilling on the floor out there begging for more

my hands look old
my heart is bruised
there are days when wrinkles appear
I am not yet 29
though I feel aged
worn, withered, used
strength is not an option
between the mourning hours of 2 and 4
liquor is what I turn to
the nectar that wets the lips
engulfs the soul
and eases the pain

quit it all or just give in
decisions plague my mind with each passing thought
it is not him I search for but myself
out there amongst the weeds
i see her
i hear her
but I cannot call to her
for I am mute
an open mouth with no sound
a scream with no emotion
a sleep with no dream
dull, dead, decomposing
is the heart of a jilted lover

open your mind to the thoughts of me
for I cannot distract myself any longer
from the thoughts of you
or maybe it's just the liquor talking