Daughter

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

Alone...listless...breakfast table in an otherwise empty room
Young girl...violins(ence)...center of her own attention
Mother reads aloud, child tries to understand it
Tries to make her proud
The shades go down, it's in her head
Painted room...can't deny there's something wrong...
Don't call me daughter, not fit to
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me daughter, not fit to
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me...

She holds the hand that holds her down
She will...rise above...

Don't call me daughter, not fit to
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me daughter, not fit to be
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me...
Don't call me daughter, not fit to
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me daughter, not fit to be
The picture kept will remind me
Don't call me...

The shades go down
The shades go down
The shades go, go, go...

I didn't see a thread for this song. I think there's quite a few strong interpretations i.e., daughter is dyslexic etc. When did the tags start to come into the song, and what would you think of the song live if it didn't include tags? I really like this song, the lyrics are very clear even though I may not know the overall gest of the song. In concert I like how the tags vary, and especially the Esta Bien tag

Boom The Cat · October 2006

This is kinda irrelivent, but I just have to say it, I love this song, I feel amazingly privaleged to have heard it, I can't express how much this song means to me.

humanlight · October 2006

I have heard the song is about a young girl with Mental Retartation. I am not sure if it was in one of the PJ books or an article. But, what a beautiful song...like others on here, it has a special place in my heart as well. I am not sure about the tags...why those choose this song.

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

I always thought the shades were the end of the nighttime reading, and it's time to go to bed, and the mother pulls the shades. Or are the shades more metaphorical in her head, a rest from her drive to please her mom, or rather more anxiety in her head becaue of the drive to please her mom?

I also thought that the daughter picture was evidence that the daughter was adopted or something, but do you think it's a picture of another sibling who maybe didn't have such a hard time?

Boom The Cat · October 2006

I heard that it 'Could be about Eds battle with dyslexia'

humanlight · October 2006

I have always listen to the song from a little different point of view. Like the daughter saying "don't call me daughter" telling mom that she is a bad mother, and letting the mom know that she (the daughter) is aware that her mom is ashamed of her.

Sort of like they are both ashamed of each other.

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

Yeah, I can see where both of you are coming from. What are the shades? Are they actually shades? When I think of shades I think of very thick material, no light can come through, and the room is dark like in the song. But, are the shades in the songs really physical shades?

Boom The Cat · October 2006

Yeah, alot of people think they are related to RearviewMirror ''Finally the shades are raised''

Probably about child abuse, Daughter says the shades go into her head, rearview mirror (which is about leaving everything behind) says the shades are raised.

humanlight · October 2006

I think it is a metaphore.

I believe it to be like the barrier between her and her child. for some reason, they just cannot connect. Mom is trying to read to her, and the daughter is trying to understand it, so they are bothing giving there all to what they believe their "role" to be, but then something just drops (a shade) between them, and the communication is now over. they just cannot connect. It is like they can see with their eyes through the shade, but they cannot really reach each other.

Then at the end...I take it as the shades go down, and stay down. Like both feel the relationship is hopeless. I see this as a song of frustration on how to parent a special needs child, or how to be a child of a "special needs" parents.

obiwon76 · October 2006

This song has been up for grabs for me for the past 13 years as to what it truly means. Although Ed has never specifically said what he thought it was about, I think there is a general agreement it's about a girl/daughter who is being held down by a someone, a loved one, a father.
Very emotional. The tags during the live shows are mostly unassociated with the theme of the song though.

"Mother reads aloud, child, trys to understand, trys to make her proud"

* Most times in a abusive relationship, especially with children, if the male figure is the abuser, the wife either does not know, or will not do anything about it. The child often feeling ashamed, will not reveal the abuse to their mother in fear of dissapointing her.

"She holds the hand, that holds her down"

* Maybe the strongest PJ line of all time. Imagine, the same child who is being abused, has to hold the hand of same person. A father holding his child's hand is a sign of protection, love, but in this case, it's the opposite.

"The shades go down"....

* This could mean alot of things, one could be the shades going down is a symbol of the child giving up.

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

obiwon76 wrote:

"She holds the hand, that holds her down"

* Maybe the strongest PJ line of all time. Imagine, the same child who is being abused, has to hold the hand of same person. A father holding his child's hand is a sign of protection, love, but in this case, it's the opposite.

I'm still digesting the other posts, but I have to say I agree with you here. A cruel world to some, eh, and there are pictures of smiles that would have an outside observer not think twice.

humanlight · October 2006

obiwon76 wrote:

This song has been up for grabs for me for the past 13 years as to what it truly means. Although Ed has never specifically said what he thought it was about, I think there is a general agreement it's about a girl/daughter who is being held down by a someone, a loved one, a father.
Very emotional. The tags during the live shows are mostly unassociated with the theme of the song though.

"Mother reads aloud, child, trys to understand, trys to make her proud"

* Most times in a abusive relationship, especially with children, if the male figure is the abuser, the wife either does not know, or will not do anything about it. The child often feeling ashamed, will not reveal the abuse to their mother in fear of dissapointing her.

"She holds the hand, that holds her down"

I have never concidered it to be about a daugther and her dad. I think that could be b/c me and my father have an amazing relationship. And because me and my mother's was unstable at best, yet we all lived in the same home, and my parents to this day are still married. I always just assumed it was about a mother who was abusive. Thanks, that is a very interesting idea.

Boom The Cat · October 2006

humanlight wrote:

I have never concidered it to be about a daugther and her dad. I think that could be b/c me and my father have an amazing relationship. And because me and my mother's was unstable at best, yet we all lived in the same home, and my parents to this day are still married. I always just assumed it was about a mother who was abusive. Thanks, that is a very interesting idea.

I had the same problem, except my parents were divorced and my dad just didnt give a shit, I found out later that I wasnt related to him in the slightest, or my sisters. Which would explain why.

humanlight · October 2006

Boom The Cat wrote:

I had the same problem, except my parents were divorced and my dad just didnt give a shit, I found out later that I wasnt related to him in the slightest, or my sisters. Which would explain why.

Wow! I am soooo sorry. My parents were married, but my mom was emotionally, physically, verbally abusive. All of my friends loved her. They would come to my house to talk to her. I tried to tell them, that she was a monster, but they never believed me. She also acted perfect when Dad was awake, but when he went to bed it was like a totally different person. She know takes medication, and has more good days than bad. I moved 2 hours away to, which helps. I miss my dad and brother greatly, but I hate to say it...I don't trust my mom. I love her, but no longer feel close to her. So "don't call me daughter" always was turned up very loud in my car and I screamed it each time I heard it. I love love love this song!!!!

humanlight · October 2006

Just a little bump back to the front, which is where this song should be.

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

Understanding the shades as a resigned feeling that the parent and child give up makes this one of the saddest PJ songs out there. More so sad than others because the child has a right, a basic human right, to live with dignity in an environment appropriate for children. Jesus, just thinking about this is making me very very sad.

On to the picture, then. What's up with the picture? I read all the posts, but I still don't get the picture. What is suppose to be in the picture that is a big lie?

Evvo · October 2006

Daughter>RVM>Small Town

i believe they are about the same character. The "Daughter" gets away from the beatings mentioned in RVM (which are what occur when "the shades go down"), and as an "Elderly Woman", she sees the mother/father figure from her earlier life - but it is so long ago that she cant recognize them, and vice versa. She just wants to scream hello.

Ms. Haiku · October 2006

Evvo wrote:

"Elderly Woman", she sees the mother/father figure from her earlier life - but it is so long ago that she cant recognize them, and vice versa. She just wants to scream hello.

That is the first time I heard that Elderly Woman was looking at her younger self. I thought she was looking at a lover that she hasn't seen in a while.

humanlight · October 2006

I always viewed the Painted Room, as a child's room. Most children have very bright colored rooms with cheerful images. So again looking from a strangers view point it looks perfect. The child holds her moms hand, but mom is really there for her, her room looks like an average little girls room, but again this child is not average. I think we see a lot of polar oppisites in this song. Where all appears well, and looks fine, but underneath there is a terrible problem. A problem that could strain the very most basic relationship of a mother and child.

humanlight · October 2006

Sorry, I went on and on about the painted room, not the picture...but here is my views on the picture.

I think it is photograph of the daughter and her mom or the family. I think it reminds either the mother that she has a daughter she is not proud of, or it remind the daugher she has a mother she is not proud of. Again, we are seeing opposites. The picture is of a family, and all pictures of families, everyone is smiling. Even those who are abused, so I believe it is like a family photo. I have always took it as the child looks at it and sees how fake her life is, and her mother is not at all who is presents to be. The picture is all she has to remind her of a "real mother" b/c her acutal mom is not like the photo.

PJ-Sin · October 2006

I have never really given too much thought into these lyrics untill just recently.

I am engaged to a really great girl and she has a 6 yr old daughter whos biological father passed away a few years ago from cancer. Now, I adore her and she really adores me too, but as much as she wants to call me dad (and she comes close quite often) she gets kinda shy and just cant do it. And on the same token, I have a hard time calling her "my" daughter (even though I love her like she is my own).
So, I was listening to this song a few months ago and suddenly realized the song was now so clear to me. My interpretation is this could be about a young girl who has lost her father and now has someone else in the picture filling the "father" role, but shes not quite ready to let go. Hence the "dont call me daughter, not fit to be."

I dont know, I guess its kinda of a personal interpretation.

Oh, on a different subject, she loves it when I play "Inside Job" on guitar.

Daughter

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