Options

Long-distance relationships?

We All BelieveWe All Believe Scarsdale, NY Posts: 456
Anyone out there currently in an LDR, or has been in one in the past?

I'm still getting over an incredibly painful breakup, but I am finally starting to feel like I can re-enter the dating pool.

A friend has been bugging me for a while about a co-worker that she thinks is perfect for me.

We've been chatting for a little bit (nothing super-deep, still in a fact-finding mode), and I'm going to see her in a couple of weeks for the first time.

She lives roughly 2 hours away from me, but I'm in her area a lot when I visit my best friend and her daughters (my Goddaughters).

Getting waaaaaaaay ahead of myself lol, but I'm up there enough that if our first date goes well, I'd consider it.

Thoughts?

TIA,

Andrew
If not for love, I would be drowning.

Join the fight to prevent suicide at www.afsp.org

Comments

  • Options
    hedonisthedonist standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
    My now-husband and I did it for a year and a half (he lived cross country). Back in the days before iPhones, etc.! It’s not easy for sure, but definitely doable.

    I know of others in the same boat.

    Best of luck to you!
  • Options
    markymark550markymark550 Columbia, SC Posts: 5,105
    My wife and I were in an LDR when we first started dating. We lived in the same dorm at college and met through a mutual friend. For various reasons, she decided to transfer to another school the summer after we met. With her transferring, she went back to live with her parents, who were about an hour away. We decided to keep the relationship going despite the distance. We would see each other on the weekends and summers while we were both finishing school. This was when cell phones were just starting to get widespread use, so we would use AOL Instant Messenger during the day and wait for the free long distance to kick in at night before talking on the phone. We did that for a little over 3 years until she graduated and found a job where I lived (I was already out of school and working then). It was definitely difficult at times, but we both knew early on that we had something worth holding on to.
  • Options
    PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 49,533
    I personally wouldn't consider OP's situation to be a LDR. 2 hours away, and you're in the other's area a lot... sounds pretty doable to me, IF you really like her and think it's worth the commute!
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • Options
    dankinddankind I am not your foot. Posts: 20,827
    Anyone who's in a relationship with me is in a long-distance relationship, regardless of proximity.
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • Options
    I think some people can make it work, I guess it depends on the people and their  situation.
  • Options
    LoujoeLoujoe Posts: 7,783
    ^lol (are the kids still saying that)

    Enjoy the romance.  Good times.
  • Options
    goldrushgoldrush everybody knows this is nowhere Posts: 7,277
    We spent almost year being 10,000 miles away from each other. I think that counts! 

    I met a girl in Sydney when I was travelling, and she came over to the UK when my trip was over. We were about 2 years into our relationship when she had to return to Australia for family reasons. I couldn’t afford to go with her (still broke from my year overseas) so I stayed in London. The plan was always for her to come back to the UK, but she had to stay longer and then we ran into some bullshit visa issues so I applied to move to Aus instead. 

    We still live in Sydney and we’ve been married for 12 years this year.
    “Do not postpone happiness”
    (Jeff Tweedy, Sydney 2007)

    “Put yer good money on the sunrise”
    (Tim Rogers)
  • Options
    BentleyspopBentleyspop Craft Beer Brewery, Colorado Posts: 10,542
    2 hours is nothing.

    I met my S/O before PJ in Lincoln, NE in 2014.
    I lived in Boulder while she lived In Omaha.a 7.5 hour drive or 80 minute flight.
    Once we got to know each other over the phone, email, and texting we embarked on a relationship. We would travel to see each other every couple of weeks and stay for 4-5 days. Sometimes we would meet in another city like Chicago, San Diego, NYC, etc. Sometimes we would meet halfway in the middle of nowhere for a couple of nights.
    After almost 3 years I made the huge jump and moved to Omaha where I've been for almost 5 years now.
    With the right person it is worth the time and effort.
  • Options
    mace1229mace1229 Posts: 9,001
    2 hours really is nothing. When I met my wife we dated for a few months before she moved out of state. A 2-hour flight away. We decided to keep dating. 10 years ago weekend flights from LA to Denver were $99 or less. So we saw each other every other weekend for a year. I had some LA friends ask me how I did it until I pointed out I saw my girlfriend more than they saw theirs. A 12 mile drive to the valley can take almost 2 hours, so they’d only. Get together on weekends for half the day. We’d make a whole weekend every other week.
    Would be so much easier if it was a 2 hour drive instead of a 2 hour flight for the weekend.
  • Options
    F Me In The BrainF Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 30,619
    edited April 2022
    Started as a longer distance thing in the mid 90s, have lived together since 2004, married since 2007.
    Can I request that we go back to long distance?


    Good luck OP, hope she is a match and you have this to consider as an option.
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • Options
    maynardsuxmaynardsux Posts: 1,085
    Started as a longer distance thing in the mid 90s, have lived together since 2004, married since 2007.
    Can I request that we go back to long distance?


    Good luck OP, hope she is a match and you have this to consider as an option.
    lol
    '93 Toronto
    '94 Detroit
    '10 Columbus
    '11 Detroit (Eddie solo), Toronto 1 and 2, Ottawa, Hamilton
    '13 London, Pittsburgh, Buffalo
    '14 Detroit
    '16 Ottawa, Toronto 1 and 2, Chicago 1 and 2
    '18 Chicago 1 and 2
    '22 Hamilton, Toronto
  • Options
    We All BelieveWe All Believe Scarsdale, NY Posts: 456
    Thanks all for your feedback. She seems cool so far. We'll see.
    If not for love, I would be drowning.

    Join the fight to prevent suicide at www.afsp.org
  • Options
    tempo_n_groovetempo_n_groove Posts: 39,006
    I had to do it for years.  They never panned out.  The last relationship I'm in I left my job for her and other reasons but if you aren't both in the right frame of mind it is just too difficult.


  • Options
    Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 12,479
    Started as a longer distance thing in the mid 90s, have lived together since 2004, married since 2007.
    Can I request that we go back to long distance?


    Good luck OP, hope she is a match and you have this to consider as an option.
    LOL! That was my first thought when I saw the post.  My wife and I get along so much better when she is in Tokyo!  I kid. I kid.

    Agree that 2 hours away does not qualify as long distance. Plus now you have face time ;)
Sign In or Register to comment.