One of Millions

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  • 23scidoo
    23scidoo Thessaloniki,Greece Posts: 20,061
    JC29856 said:
    Hopefully we're all well rested. Please allow me to break this down and explain how mind boggling it is for anyone to assume I was being anything but empathetic to this situation topic. This might be a good example or mini case study for the points in the google memo as it relates to male/female and conservation/liberal bias.

    The op posts the video of sinead with the comments "i hope she gets some rest soon". After watching the video, I'm left with the impression that sinead is in a mental crisis and likely suicidal. Instead of assuming or hoping against something the op may have meant, I courteously replied asking the op suggesting maybe clarification of the comments are needed. I thought the comments could be misconstrued and for me they are confusing.
    I don't know the op so in reading the post and replies I'm not sure if the person is maybe meaning sinead should kill herself soon, by hoping she gets some rest soon... I'm not suicidal, I do get occasional "mental maintenance" from a professional, and recommend that for everyone. Obviously by posting it the subject and/or the topic is important to the op.
    What do I know, maybe the op has/had similar experience and the word "rest" is an indication that someone is (it honestly did cross my mind) suicidal (any health pros around).
    My reply "very important topic and the video is an obvious cry out for help" (does my reply seem funny/tasteless or empathetic?)
    The ops reply / clarification was also confusing, maybe even snide...  "^^that was i meant..peace of mind of course.." Okay I give the op the benefit of doubt but maybe he/she is hating on sinead for some reason (religious etc). I'm not in the mind of the op but its absolutely plausible by the comments that the posts could be derogatory (being made fun of). Hasn't sinead practically her entire life been the butt end of tasteless jokes, hasn't she been made fun of her entire career, (from her choice of hair style, clothing to her opinions viewpoints) or is that my imagination? Not a far stretch to think that maybe this post is a underhanded dig at sinead (thats why I asked for clarification).
    I'm not a mental health expert but as I explained I doubt that after watching that video health professionals would first and foremost recommend "rest". Wouldn't it be get some help? Don't remain alone, isolated, talk to someone?
    When people say "that person needs help" or "that person should seek mental help", are they imply that the person may need rest, have a sleep disorder, that the help they should seek somehow involves rest/sleep? I don't know I certainly never looked at it that way, maybe I'm waaay off. If someone came to me having a crisis and is suicidal, rest sleep would be pretty far down my list of how to help. IMO rest is secondary.

    This thread is titled "one of millions" with a video of someone in crisis, it is not specific to sinead or at least I didn't think so. Many people silently suffer with mental health issues, as I stated a very important topic and not one to be made fun of.

    I posted the text messages (as explained by h2m) to show how not to help someone in crisis, which I thought is similar to recommending someone getting some rest in such a desperate situation. Again not being entirely convinced the op wasn't posting for fun.
    Its completely mind boggling to me how anyone (assuming, without asking for clarity, if they weren't sure) would assume that my replies were "making fun of" or "tasteless".
    I would have certainly explained myself if someone asked.

    "now back to the music"
    My apologies if i wasn't a 100% clear with my comments..i saw a person who needs help and i'm hoping she find some soon..
    with the words 'rest' or 'peace of mind', i don't mean death or something else..thank you..
    Athens 2006. Dusseldorf 2007. Berlin 2009. Venice 2010. Amsterdam 1 2012. Amsterdam 1+2 2014. Buenos Aires 2015.
    Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
    EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.

    I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    It's right there next to the OP's username.

    I'm not going to do the silly back-and-forth thing over this and your "recommendation".  It's one page.  Go up, read again, and if you think you were a stand-up person through it?  Great, boom, done.
  • Go Beavers
    Go Beavers Posts: 9,618
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    I'm curious how you're drawing a parallel to the google memo?  
  • dignin
    dignin Posts: 9,478
    23scidoo said:
    JC29856 said:
    Hopefully we're all well rested. Please allow me to break this down and explain how mind boggling it is for anyone to assume I was being anything but empathetic to this situation topic. This might be a good example or mini case study for the points in the google memo as it relates to male/female and conservation/liberal bias.

    The op posts the video of sinead with the comments "i hope she gets some rest soon". After watching the video, I'm left with the impression that sinead is in a mental crisis and likely suicidal. Instead of assuming or hoping against something the op may have meant, I courteously replied asking the op suggesting maybe clarification of the comments are needed. I thought the comments could be misconstrued and for me they are confusing.
    I don't know the op so in reading the post and replies I'm not sure if the person is maybe meaning sinead should kill herself soon, by hoping she gets some rest soon... I'm not suicidal, I do get occasional "mental maintenance" from a professional, and recommend that for everyone. Obviously by posting it the subject and/or the topic is important to the op.
    What do I know, maybe the op has/had similar experience and the word "rest" is an indication that someone is (it honestly did cross my mind) suicidal (any health pros around).
    My reply "very important topic and the video is an obvious cry out for help" (does my reply seem funny/tasteless or empathetic?)
    The ops reply / clarification was also confusing, maybe even snide...  "^^that was i meant..peace of mind of course.." Okay I give the op the benefit of doubt but maybe he/she is hating on sinead for some reason (religious etc). I'm not in the mind of the op but its absolutely plausible by the comments that the posts could be derogatory (being made fun of). Hasn't sinead practically her entire life been the butt end of tasteless jokes, hasn't she been made fun of her entire career, (from her choice of hair style, clothing to her opinions viewpoints) or is that my imagination? Not a far stretch to think that maybe this post is a underhanded dig at sinead (thats why I asked for clarification).
    I'm not a mental health expert but as I explained I doubt that after watching that video health professionals would first and foremost recommend "rest". Wouldn't it be get some help? Don't remain alone, isolated, talk to someone?
    When people say "that person needs help" or "that person should seek mental help", are they imply that the person may need rest, have a sleep disorder, that the help they should seek somehow involves rest/sleep? I don't know I certainly never looked at it that way, maybe I'm waaay off. If someone came to me having a crisis and is suicidal, rest sleep would be pretty far down my list of how to help. IMO rest is secondary.

    This thread is titled "one of millions" with a video of someone in crisis, it is not specific to sinead or at least I didn't think so. Many people silently suffer with mental health issues, as I stated a very important topic and not one to be made fun of.

    I posted the text messages (as explained by h2m) to show how not to help someone in crisis, which I thought is similar to recommending someone getting some rest in such a desperate situation. Again not being entirely convinced the op wasn't posting for fun.
    Its completely mind boggling to me how anyone (assuming, without asking for clarity, if they weren't sure) would assume that my replies were "making fun of" or "tasteless".
    I would have certainly explained myself if someone asked.

    "now back to the music"
    My apologies if i wasn't a 100% clear with my comments..i saw a person who needs help and i'm hoping she find some soon..
    with the words 'rest' or 'peace of mind', i don't mean death or something else..thank you..
    No need to apologize. You were being trolled, best just to ignore.
  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    hedonist said:
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    It's right there next to the OP's username.

    I'm not going to do the silly back-and-forth thing over this and your "recommendation".  It's one page.  Go up, read again, and if you think you were a stand-up person through it?  Great, boom, done.
    1. I use a phone, where froms are not displayed
    2. Questions are posed with quotes to indicate who directed at.

    In any event the op was gracious and I appreciate the response. I'm sorry if I offended him her in any way.
  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    edited August 2017
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    I'm curious how you're drawing a parallel to the google memo?  
    well done! good question!
     
    I'll suggest you read the Google memo then read my explanation above, it may shed some light.
  • Go Beavers
    Go Beavers Posts: 9,618
    JC29856 said:
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    I'm curious how you're drawing a parallel to the google memo?  
    well done! good question!
     
    I'll suggest you read the Google memo then read my explanation above, it may shed some light.
    I know yesterday is a bit foggy for you, but I did read the memo and highlighted where I thought the author was being whiney in the other thread. I have assumptions about why you're drawing a parallel to it in here, but I thought I'd ask first. Anyway, here they are: Hedonists reply was straightforward and respectful, but maybe saying you were being condescending offended you? The only connection to the memo I see is that both you and the author have difficulty hearing feedback from others, and interpret this as being shut down and sidelined. But as a fellow white guy, I know that the expectation is that we speak what's on our mind without needing to engage in dialogue or listen to what others think about it. The times they are a changing, though. Thankfully.  
  • tempo_n_groove
    tempo_n_groove Posts: 41,599
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    I'm curious how you're drawing a parallel to the google memo?  
    well done! good question!
     
    I'll suggest you read the Google memo then read my explanation above, it may shed some light.
    I know yesterday is a bit foggy for you, but I did read the memo and highlighted where I thought the author was being whiney in the other thread. I have assumptions about why you're drawing a parallel to it in here, but I thought I'd ask first. Anyway, here they are: Hedonists reply was straightforward and respectful, but maybe saying you were being condescending offended you? The only connection to the memo I see is that both you and the author have difficulty hearing feedback from others, and interpret this as being shut down and sidelined. But as a fellow white guy, I know that the expectation is that we speak what's on our mind without needing to engage in dialogue or listen to what others think about it. The times they are a changing, though. Thankfully.  

  • tempo_n_groove
    tempo_n_groove Posts: 41,599
    hedonist said:
    I couldn't watch more than a minute.  I so love Sinead and her strong angelic voice; to see her (anyone, really) in such obvious pain...oh man.

    Seems she's struggled with many hurdles through her life.  I too hope she finds her own serenity.
    Hedo I found this to be painful also.  Hopefully someone can help her.
  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    Go Beavers said:
    JC29856 said:
    hedonist said:
    Backtrack all you like - though I appreciate your attempt at explaining - but consider that 23 is from Greece as shown, and isn't an asshole or lacking compassion; so, maybe...perhaps a small gap in language?  In any event, I did ask for clarification and was given your condescending response.
    Its unfortunate that you consider my explanation as backtracking, your certainly entitled to your opinion as are we all.
    yours is yours and mine won't take it's place

    As I stated I don't know the op so I wouldn't know where their from but it helps explaining. I make no assumptions about anyone nor do I do recon on who what where. I find it rather curious that you didn't offer the op is from Greece until now. Why not mention that in any of your previous replies?

    If you think that reply is a question that asks for clarification then I'll stick to my original recommendation.

    This is actually a good case study of the Google memo.
    I'm curious how you're drawing a parallel to the google memo?  
    well done! good question!
     
    I'll suggest you read the Google memo then read my explanation above, it may shed some light.
    I know yesterday is a bit foggy for you, but I did read the memo and highlighted where I thought the author was being whiney in the other thread. I have assumptions about why you're drawing a parallel to it in here, but I thought I'd ask first. Anyway, here they are: Hedonists reply was straightforward and respectful, but maybe saying you were being condescending offended you? The only connection to the memo I see is that both you and the author have difficulty hearing feedback from others, and interpret this as being shut down and sidelined. But as a fellow white guy, I know that the expectation is that we speak what's on our mind without needing to engage in dialogue or listen to what others think about it. The times they are a changing, though. Thankfully.  
    You use the word parallel, I used the phrase case study
    straightforward: uncomplicated and easy to do or understand.
    In real life I don't take offense to much. I'm a big wanye dyer fan, one of his rules is stop being offended. Its comes easy to me. I would argue that its rather difficult to be offended by strangers from online forums. Firstly, how can anyone know someone from an online forum? I don't pretend to know anyone on these forums. Secondly, if one doesn't care about anothers opinion of them then how can that person be offended? 
    I'm all about honest feedback, there is feedback in this thread (and others) and I responded to it. Im willing to have silly back and forth but I cant change what people think or believe and I don't try.
    Take for instance everyones favorite topic, pizzagate, jimmyv may believe that it centered on a sex ring from a pizzashop basement and thats fine, he has his reasons why he believes that. When I attempted to ask how and why he believes that, it went nowhere. Im not really sure what that was, but Im fairly certain thats what it wasnt. When I see a picture of a child with the hashtag chickenlover, Im not sure what that is but Im confident it isnt actually someone that loves chicken. Like the pizza related map, I dont know what it is but I know it isnt a pizza map on a handkerchief. If someone believes otherwise thats fine, they have their reasons.
    Here's the thing, whats the next best thing when you don't know or arent sure of something? IMO the next best is what it isnt. I tell kids all the time, I dont expect you to know what or who you want to be but I do expect you to know what or who you dont want to be.
    Heres another, in life, work, a project etc, start with what you know, work thru it and worry about what you dont know later, eventually it will come.

    I actually do care if or when I offend someone, as I said I apologize if I offended the op. Things were lost in translation, especially my thinking the second reply was snide. If I had known english isnt the first language, it would have made all the difference, but I didnt and it went from there.

    You or anyone else can think this is horseshit and that's fine.
  • Go Beavers
    Go Beavers Posts: 9,618
    That's a lot of hair splitting and tangential jibber jabber. So how would this be a 'case study' of the google memo?
  • 23scidoo
    23scidoo Thessaloniki,Greece Posts: 20,061
    It's fine JC..
    Athens 2006. Dusseldorf 2007. Berlin 2009. Venice 2010. Amsterdam 1 2012. Amsterdam 1+2 2014. Buenos Aires 2015.
    Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
    EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.

    I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    It's national suicide prevention week, look for the signs, spread the word.

    http://nspw.suicidology.org/

  • JC29856
    JC29856 Posts: 9,617
    Halifax2TheMax said:
    3D copying and pasting the text exchange between the woman, who was the girlfriend at the time, of the young man who committed suicide via carbon monoxide poisoning after she egged him on. She was recently on trial and convicted in Massachusetts of second degree manslaughter, I believe but could be wrong on the crime she was charged/convicted of. Tasteless at best.
    #nowayjose
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