'You Deserve Rape' sign causes controversy on UA campus

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  • Hugh Freaking Dillon
    Hugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    mickeyrat wrote:
    redrock wrote:
    mickeyrat wrote:
    the rapist..
    Karma
    odd shit, let me tell you.

    I carried hatred for him ( myself too) for 18 years. I was in drug/alcohol treatment center when I read a story in the newspaper on the 4th about a blockwatch cookout held earlier in the day of the 2nd and how this guy was shot that night in the alley behind that same house.

    he died on Aug 2 2006 at about 9:00 pm or so. Right around this same time I was reciting the prayer for step 3 of alcoholics anonymous.

    Somehow my first thought was for his family and what they must be going through. I ended up going to his funeral. With the repsect the event deserved

    wow. my first thought after reading this was "I'd love to meet you and talk to you by a fire for an evening".
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • Hugh Freaking Dillon
    Hugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    if a woman was walking naked down the street wearing a sign saying "I love fucking", that STILL would not warrant being taken by force. point being: there is no scenario in the world where a person deserves to be assaulted.

    EVER.
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • Cosmo
    Cosmo Posts: 12,225
    Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:
    if a woman was walking naked down the street wearing a sign saying "I love fucking", that STILL would not warrant being taken by force. point being: there is no scenario in the world where a person deserves to be assaulted.

    EVER.
    ...
    Exactly. It is not the smartest thing to do, but it does not justify someone commiting a crime base on someone else's poor decision making.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Cosmo wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I've missed you - nice to have you back, Cos.
    ...
    Spent the past 2 weeks in Hawaii... pretty much surf and sushi the whole time. Missed you, too.
    Speaking of which... you guys should check out J.Ament's band. They are going to be at the Bootleg Theater on Beverly Blvd. on may 8th. Or.. next time we're at Largo... we should meet up at Sushi On La Cienega (a bit pricey, but great) or Swingers (Beverly, near Fairfax).
    ...
    aloha.
    Thanks for the heads-up and happy for your surf & sushi time! Aloha back, bud.

    PS...some great guys on this forum, that's for sure.
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    pandora wrote:
    I meant blaming men who are not helping to stop rape ... the society of male thought...
    that is the men all around.
    If you want to stop rape stop bitching and do something about it.
    A women can be just as smart, strong and empowered as a man we just have to teach them how.
    or we can continue to blame men... I'd rather take action as many women are.

    oh im sorry... WHAT? MEN are to blame when they rape women. MEN... it doesn't matter what women are wearing. what time they are out and about or the attitude they exude. the onus NOT TO RAPE is on men. I know youre trying to be clever here Pandora but how dare you even consider that women are somehow to blame for the actions of men. and how dare you suggest we stop bitching and 'do something about it'. what is it you suggest we(as women) do to stop rape? WE are smart. we ARE strong. but no matter what we say, how we act or what we impart to our daughters, the society we live in a patriarchal society and one that sees the trepass of men as something to be indulged cause somehow after all these years women are still seen as somehow inferior, weaker and not worth as much as men. I say to you that it is NOT us women that need to change but MEN who need to modify their attitude towards us. raping is wrong... we know that... why is it we need to tell men that?
    hear my name
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  • riotgrl
    riotgrl LOUISVILLE Posts: 1,895
    catefrances wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    I meant blaming men who are not helping to stop rape ... the society of male thought...
    that is the men all around.
    If you want to stop rape stop bitching and do something about it.
    A women can be just as smart, strong and empowered as a man we just have to teach them how.
    or we can continue to blame men... I'd rather take action as many women are.

    oh im sorry... WHAT? MEN are to blame when they rape women. MEN... it doesn't matter what women are wearing. what time they are out and about or the attitude they exude. the onus NOT TO RAPE is on men. I know youre trying to be clever here Pandora but how dare you even consider that women are somehow to blame for the actions of men. and how dare you suggest we stop bitching and 'do something about it'. what is it you suggest we(as women) do to stop rape? WE are smart. we ARE strong. but no matter what we say, how we act or what we impart to our daughters, the society we live in a patriarchal society and one that sees the trepass of men as something to be indulged cause somehow after all these years women are still seen as somehow inferior, weaker and not worth as much as men. I say to you that it is NOT us women that need to change but MEN who need to modify their attitude towards us. raping is wrong... we know that... why is it we need to tell men that?

    What is of equal concern to me is that there are women out there who buy into the notion that women ARE to blame for rape. That men canNOT control themselves (as if rape is about sex) and that some women believe they are inferior to men and thus believe that rape is deserved in any way. Perhaps it is not just the mindset of some men that needs to be changed but of some women as well (not implying that of any women on this board just saying women in general). Must also acknowledge what someone said earlier about having some stand up men on these boards (women too!)
    Are we getting something out of this all-encompassing trip?

    Seems my preconceptions are what should have been burned...

    I AM MINE
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    catefrances wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    I meant blaming men who are not helping to stop rape ... the society of male thought...
    that is the men all around.
    If you want to stop rape stop bitching and do something about it.
    A women can be just as smart, strong and empowered as a man we just have to teach them how.
    or we can continue to blame men... I'd rather take action as many women are.

    oh im sorry... WHAT? MEN are to blame when they rape women. MEN... it doesn't matter what women are wearing. what time they are out and about or the attitude they exude. the onus NOT TO RAPE is on men. I know youre trying to be clever here Pandora but how dare you even consider that women are somehow to blame for the actions of men. and how dare you suggest we stop bitching and 'do something about it'. what is it you suggest we(as women) do to stop rape? WE are smart. we ARE strong. but no matter what we say, how we act or what we impart to our daughters, the society we live in a patriarchal society and one that sees the trepass of men as something to be indulged cause somehow after all these years women are still seen as somehow inferior, weaker and not worth as much as men. I say to you that it is NOT us women that need to change but MEN who need to modify their attitude towards us. raping is wrong... we know that... why is it we need to tell men that?
    I never said a woman is to blame for rape, not once.
    Yes I spoke of just that male mentality... Neanderthal.


    What is most to blame is we are not teaching women to fight back. Why?
    And why are women in the position to be raped?
    I mean there is a rape like every few minutes in the US. Why?

    I believe each person is responsible for their own safety and must take it upon themselves
    to protect themselves. The young girls we hear being victimized when drinking too much.
    Can we educate young girls about those that will take advantage of them?
    Can we teach them not to put themselves in vulnerable places? EVER.

    I feel women should be far more empowered then they are. Be ready to kill to protect their bodies.
    Self defense, weapon carrying, good common sense like don't go to the hotel room of two men
    you meet in a bar while traveling :? really?
    there are bad bad people waiting for the opportunity to victimize.

    This something that should be taught as soon as a child can understand. Then age appropriate
    lessons there after.

    I guess we can just rag again about the idiot here talking foolish or say the redundant...
    there should be no rape ever... men should know better :wtf: ain't gonna happen.


    or we, as the victims can do something about it. I vote do something.
    Each and every woman do something to protect themselves.
  • Jeanwah
    Jeanwah Posts: 6,363
    edited April 2013
    .
    Post edited by Jeanwah on
  • donnaruhl
    donnaruhl Posts: 2,157
    They had this on Law and Order the other night. ;)
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    donnaruhl wrote:
    They had this on Law and Order the other night. ;)
    My daughters favorite TV show

    she's finishing her studies now to stop victimizers in their tracks ... tall order.
  • Hugh Freaking Dillon
    Hugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    pandora wrote:

    What is most to blame is we are not teaching women to fight back. Why?
    And why are women in the position to be raped?
    I mean there is a rape like every few minutes in the US. Why?

    I believe each person is responsible for their own safety and must take it upon themselves
    to protect themselves. The young girls we hear being victimized when drinking too much.
    Can we educate young girls about those that will take advantage of them?
    Can we teach them not to put themselves in vulnerable places? EVER.

    THIS, is blaming the victim. and if you disagree with that, ponder this for a moment: who are you putting the onus on, the victim or the perp, when you say that men can go out and do stuff (go out and drinking too much) that women shouldn't? putting the onus on the victim is the same as blaming them for the act.
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • Jeanwah
    Jeanwah Posts: 6,363
    Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:
    pandora wrote:

    What is most to blame is we are not teaching women to fight back. Why?
    And why are women in the position to be raped?
    I mean there is a rape like every few minutes in the US. Why?

    I believe each person is responsible for their own safety and must take it upon themselves
    to protect themselves. The young girls we hear being victimized when drinking too much.
    Can we educate young girls about those that will take advantage of them?
    Can we teach them not to put themselves in vulnerable places? EVER.

    THIS, is blaming the victim. and if you disagree with that, ponder this for a moment: who are you putting the onus on, the victim or the perp, when you say that men can go out and do stuff (go out and drinking too much) that women shouldn't? putting the onus on the victim is the same as blaming them for the act.

    Not only is it blaming the victim, but excusing men for being men (and being neanderthal). Other than that, I am not going to reply to Pandora's post as I feel as if baiting may be the reason behind her shock value post. So I will ignore from here on out.
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    I realize we might not all be on the same page with personal responsibility.
    I see many excuses being used on many topics.
    We own our own fates. We can be a victim or we can fight back.

    It is pretty basic. We can not stop people doing bad things so we must protect
    ourselves from bad people. I am seeing women change, saying they will take no more.
    Learning self defense, arming themselves, willing to fight and kill to protect their bodies.
    Using good common sense against predators, which are everywhere.
    I know this trend will grow stronger and stronger, its up to us to make the change by
    teaching future generations. By setting examples and using good common sense.

    There will always be bad men but many of them have never come upon a 'bad' woman,
    and I mean that in the nicest way. Women are not to blame of course but they
    make the difference they just have to believe they can.
    Waiting around for bad men to ever understand rape is allowing more victims.
  • redrock
    redrock Posts: 18,341
    Jeanwah wrote:
    Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:
    pandora wrote:

    What is most to blame is we are not teaching women to fight back. Why?
    And why are women in the position to be raped?
    I mean there is a rape like every few minutes in the US. Why?

    I believe each person is responsible for their own safety and must take it upon themselves
    to protect themselves. The young girls we hear being victimized when drinking too much.
    Can we educate young girls about those that will take advantage of them?
    Can we teach them not to put themselves in vulnerable places? EVER.

    THIS, is blaming the victim. and if you disagree with that, ponder this for a moment: who are you putting the onus on, the victim or the perp, when you say that men can go out and do stuff (go out and drinking too much) that women shouldn't? putting the onus on the victim is the same as blaming them for the act.

    Not only is it blaming the victim, but excusing men for being men (and being neanderthal). Other than that, I am not going to reply to Pandora's post as I feel as if baiting may be the reason behind her shock value post. So I will ignore from here on out.

    Made my blood boil, tbh.

    That, together with the smart woman (or whatever woman) being modest, understanding men.... Definitely putting the onus on the woman not to be raped (and if not, she would be 'asking for it') as opposed to the man/rapist not committing this vile act.

    It's a bit feeling that a woman suffering from domestic violence didn't do enough to please her man or maybe wasn't nice enough,etc. The 'wonder what she did to deserve that?' thing...

    Also, I feel it's putting all men in the same boat. Which again, is totally wrong.

    I just had to say something to these outrageous comments (then again.. bait?) but, as you Jean, will ignore from here on out.
  • Hugh Freaking Dillon
    Hugh Freaking Dillon Posts: 14,010
    pandora wrote:
    I realize we might not all be on the same page with personal responsibility.
    I see many excuses being used on many topics.
    We own our own fates. We can be a victim or we can fight back.

    It is pretty basic. We can not stop people doing bad things so we must protect
    ourselves from bad people. I am seeing women change, saying they will take no more.
    Learning self defense, arming themselves, willing to fight and kill to protect their bodies.
    Using good common sense against predators, which are everywhere.
    I know this trend will grow stronger and stronger, its up to us to make the change by
    teaching future generations. By setting examples and using good common sense.

    There will always be bad men but many of them have never come upon a 'bad' woman,
    and I mean that in the nicest way. Women are not to blame of course but they
    make the difference they just have to believe they can.
    Waiting around for bad men to ever understand rape is allowing more victims.

    your views are consistent, I'll give you that. taking the law into your own hands seems to be a recurring theme. How about teaching our young males to respect women IN ADDITION to teaching women to defend themselves??

    EVER HEAR OF PREVENTION? you talk incessantly about the beauty and love of the world but your suggested solutions are completely the opposite: kill or be killed.

    nope, Pandora just wants to give all women a gun and kill all the "bad guys".
    Gimli 1993
    Fargo 2003
    Winnipeg 2005
    Winnipeg 2011
    St. Paul 2014
  • Cosmo
    Cosmo Posts: 12,225
    redrock wrote:
    Made my blood boil, tbh.

    That, together with the smart woman (or whatever woman) being modest, understanding men.... Definitely putting the onus on the woman not to be raped (and if not, she would be 'asking for it') as opposed to the man/rapist not committing this vile act.

    It's a bit feeling that a woman suffering from domestic violence didn't do enough to please her man or maybe wasn't nice enough,etc. The 'wonder what she did to deserve that?' thing...

    Also, I feel it's putting all men in the same boat. Which again, is totally wrong.

    I just had to say something to these outrageous comments (then again.. bait?) but, as you Jean, will ignore from here on out.
    ...
    I guess what women need to do is... not look so pretty.
    Rape: Solved.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    redrock wrote:
    Made my blood boil, tbh.

    That, together with the smart woman (or whatever woman) being modest, understanding men.... Definitely putting the onus on the woman not to be raped (and if not, she would be 'asking for it') as opposed to the man/rapist not committing this vile act.

    It's a bit feeling that a woman suffering from domestic violence didn't do enough to please her man or maybe wasn't nice enough,etc. The 'wonder what she did to deserve that?' thing...

    Also, I feel it's putting all men in the same boat. Which again, is totally wrong.

    I just had to say something to these outrageous comments (then again.. bait?) but, as you Jean, will ignore from here on out.
    My plan is to empower women on every level ...
    how are you redrock going to change the vile men and stop rape?
    A rape that happens every how many minutes? Do you have a plan?

    Rape is a lot like domestic violence.
    Thankfully we are seeing women becoming more empowered in these situations.
    Better than 50 years ago but no where near where it should be for so many reasons.
    Women choosing not to get involved with men who are violent. Leaving, protecting their children.
    Teaching their children. Setting examples.

    We have some houses here to help those who need to escape. We need more.
    I worked to help one recently. Inspiring to help. I plan on doing much more.
    I hope other ladies here on the board are putting actions where their mouths are
    doing all they can do to support the fight to empower women.

    Like I said there will always be bad men you can not stop this and complaining does nothing.
    You can get on with real action that saves women though.
    It is women helping women to stop being victims.

    Still didn't get the modesty thing huh :lol: not too surprising maybe.
    As I said has nothing to do with outward appearance and everything to do with empowerment
    and personal responsibility.
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    Cosmo wrote:
    [
    I guess what women need to do is... not look so pretty.
    Rape: Solved.
    man's point of view perhaps :?
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    4a519_ORIG-leaving_with_disgust.gif
  • pandora
    pandora Posts: 21,855
    Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    I realize we might not all be on the same page with personal responsibility.
    I see many excuses being used on many topics.
    We own our own fates. We can be a victim or we can fight back.

    It is pretty basic. We can not stop people doing bad things so we must protect
    ourselves from bad people. I am seeing women change, saying they will take no more.
    Learning self defense, arming themselves, willing to fight and kill to protect their bodies.
    Using good common sense against predators, which are everywhere.
    I know this trend will grow stronger and stronger, its up to us to make the change by
    teaching future generations. By setting examples and using good common sense.

    There will always be bad men but many of them have never come upon a 'bad' woman,
    and I mean that in the nicest way. Women are not to blame of course but they
    make the difference they just have to believe they can.
    Waiting around for bad men to ever understand rape is allowing more victims.

    your views are consistent, I'll give you that. taking the law into your own hands seems to be a recurring theme. How about teaching our young males to respect women IN ADDITION to teaching women to defend themselves??

    EVER HEAR OF PREVENTION? you talk incessantly about the beauty and love of the world but your suggested solutions are completely the opposite: kill or be killed.

    nope, Pandora just wants to give all women a gun and kill all the "bad guys".
    There are so many ways to empower women I can see you have tunnel vision again
    guns guns guns :lol:

    I have mentioned mothers educating their children already.
    Unfortunately this change will come over generations and we need action now.
    Are you taking some? I am.

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