Fight with spouse over PJ20

lebowski70
lebowski70 Posts: 207
edited May 2011 in The Porch
I'm sure I am not alone when it comes to engaging in "negotiations" with my spouse for the 2-night, 3-day furlough to East Troy, WI (assuming it is there). The facts: We have 3 wonderful children, ages 9, 7, and 3. As a human being, we have passions in our lives. I didn't select these passions, they pretty much selected me, including Pearl Jam, the Phillies, and Eagles. I don't go to many games, and I'm not the crazy fan type of guy. My family is most important to me, bar none. It would be difficult for my wife without me around for the three days, no doubt. What am I to do? I really want to go to PJ20. I could go into the numerous ways this band has influenced my way of living, thinking, etc., but I'm sure you have heard it all before. This is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and I feel I need to be there. What am I going to do? Any thoughts?

The Dude Abides,

Lebowski :?:
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • unlost dogs
    unlost dogs Greater Boston Posts: 12,553
    Here's what I'm doing: "PJ20 is going to be in XXXX on XXXX. Please make sure you're around to take care of the dogs in my absence."
    :wave:

    Of course, that approach might not work for everyone...
    15 years of sharks 06/30/08 (MA), 05/17/10 (Boston), 09/03/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/04/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/30/12 (Missoula), 07/19/13 (Wrigley), 10/15/13 (Worcester), 10/16/13 (Worcester), 10/25/13 (Hartford), 12/4/13 (Vancouver), 12/6/13 (Seattle), 6/26/14 (Berlin), 6/28/14 (Stockholm), 10/16/14 (Detroit)
  • Cool Face Ryan
    Cool Face Ryan Posts: 1,254
    its simple, tell her the truth, and tell her how much it means to her.

    and if she is upset or wont let you go, then play Vs., Yield, and Avocado, and she will understand
    MSG II 5/21/10
    Tres Mts. Gramercy Theatre 3/26/11
    *formerly manutd3581
  • Goatboy
    Goatboy Posts: 509
    It's once in a lifetime you get to go to something like this. Don't fight over it though, its not worth that. have you talked to her about it yet?
  • crazygeo
    crazygeo Posts: 2,380
    'm sure I am not alone when it comes to engaging in "negotiations" with my spouse for the 2-night, 3-day furlough to East Troy, WI (assuming it is there). The facts: We have 2 wonderful children, ages 8, and 6. As a human being, we have passions in our lives. I didn't select these passions, they pretty much selected me, including Pearl Jam, the Phillies, and RAIDERS & PENN STATE.

    with ya just changed a few things IN YOUR POST ABOVE...I can't just spend $$$ and take off from home and work for days..I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!
    • 1991-11-17• 1998-08-28 •2000-09-01
    • 2003-07-05• 2004-10-01
    • 2005-10-03• 2006-05-27
    • 2008-06-19• 2009-10-27 2009-10-28 •2009-10-30
    • 2009-10-31

    *Tres Mts 2011-03-23
    *Eddie Vedder 2011-06-25
    - 2013-10-21
    - 2013=10-22
    -2016 -04-28
    -2016 -04-29
  • crazygeo
    crazygeo Posts: 2,380
    Re: Fight with spouse over PJ20
    by crazygeo » 15 May 2011 20:17

    'm sure I am not alone when it comes to engaging in "negotiations" with my spouse for the 2-night, 3-day furlough to East Troy, WI (assuming it is there). The facts: We have 2 wonderful children, ages 8, and 6. As a human being, we have passions in our lives. I didn't select these passions, they pretty much selected me, including Pearl Jam, the Phillies, and RAIDERS & PENN STATE.

    with ya just changed a few things IN YOUR POST ABOVE...I can't just spend $$$ and take off from home and work for days..I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!

    I WANNA GO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    • 1991-11-17• 1998-08-28 •2000-09-01
    • 2003-07-05• 2004-10-01
    • 2005-10-03• 2006-05-27
    • 2008-06-19• 2009-10-27 2009-10-28 •2009-10-30
    • 2009-10-31

    *Tres Mts 2011-03-23
    *Eddie Vedder 2011-06-25
    - 2013-10-21
    - 2013=10-22
    -2016 -04-28
    -2016 -04-29
  • mfc2006
    mfc2006 HTOWN Posts: 37,496
    we started talking about it as soon as Kelly Curtis first mentioned it. now she's talking about it more than i am! :D if i were you, i'd go with a friend if she doesn't want to go. unless you can't b/c of prior agreements, finances, etc. then i'd stay home & wait for a tour.
    I LOVE MUSIC.
    www.cluthelee.com
    www.cluthe.com
  • Blackbird24
    Blackbird24 Posts: 26
    Drop the kids off with Grandma and take your wife with you. Believe me, it's not the taking care of the kids for 3 days that is so difficult. It's taking care of the kids for three days whilst picturing your hubby partying it up, having the time of his life, at a Pearl Jam festival (ahem, weekend destination) without you. Is there anyone that can keep the kiddos for 3 days while you and the wife take a much needed long weekend?
    If not, can you offer to keep the kids while she gets away for a long weekend with her friends sometime?
    I know I was born and I know that I'll die, the inbetween is mine. I am mine.
  • ejh76
    ejh76 Posts: 133
    Just let her know this is important for you, and perhaps she can organise a girls weekend away for another time where you will be minding the kids so its fair. There is plenty of time for her to book in some help with family or friends...
    Best thing is to be honest from the get go and make sure that she gets something she wants...a day spa voucher wouldnt go astray either!
    If i lived in the States I would SO BE THERE
    Aussies will need a couple grand for the airfare and need a whole week off work...sux...
    PJ20 need to do a world tour! id happily pay whatever the cost for the ticket...its the airfare thats the killer.
    Soo happy and excited for everyone though...do you think they will make a DVD out of this? for all those that cant make it?
  • vedderlover1
    vedderlover1 Posts: 178
    I have similar child care issues and am hoping they do one day passes; I'll be happy just to make it for one night (3days w traveling). Maybe you could compromise w something like that, if you're willing to settle for just part of the weekend...in the long run it's not worth the fight I bet, there's always a comprise. Offer to watch the kids and send her to the spa Columbus day weekend;-)
  • CAVSTARR313
    CAVSTARR313 Posts: 8,756
    lebowski70 wrote:
    and Eagles.
    The Dude Abides,

    Lebowski :?:

    When the change of heart dude?
    None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe that they are free.
    Abrn Hlls '98 - Clarkston 2 '03 - Grd Rpds '06 - Abrn Hlls '06 - Clvd '10 - PJ20 - Berlin 1+2 '12 - Wrigley '13 - Pitt '13- buff '13- Philly 1+2 '13 - Seattle '13
  • BH198990
    BH198990 Posts: 174
    i'm somewhat in the same boat here....i'll try to keep it short...

    first hurdle: The 10C membership is in my wifes name. Gave it as a present a few years back after i had let it lapse in the late 90's, and we keep re-upping under this number so as not to slip back down the number line again. 10C will not do anything about it, so i've got to make it work for me however possible. This has become an issue before: i missed EV's solo tour, when i definitely wouldn't have. Ii'm normally only hitting one show a tour instead of probably 3 or so. My wife always has to attend the show with me (she's a mild fan, at best).

    So for me, i HAVE to talk the wife into it, or i'm screwed. I've got two young kids to drop somewhere for a weekend, which of course makes it harder...but really it comes down to Can I Make The Wife Feel This Is A Good Idea Somehow.

    The good part was that we visited Milwaukee for a wedding lasst summer, and really both enjoyed it a bunch. So i'm hoping to use those good memories in my favor.....
    Odds aren't looking good at this point tho....
    cheers
  • guitar59
    guitar59 Posts: 1,221
    Blackbird24 wrote:
    Drop the kids off with Grandma and take your wife with you. Believe me, it's not the taking care of the kids for 3 days that is so difficult. It's taking care of the kids for three days whilst picturing your hubby partying it up, having the time of his life, at a Pearl Jam festival (ahem, weekend destination) without you. Is there anyone that can keep the kiddos for 3 days while you and the wife take a much needed long weekend?
    If not, can you offer to keep the kids while she gets away for a long weekend with her friends sometime?
    +1
    Yes, It is the spouse having fun while hubby is enjoying himself...and no one ever thought to invite me that is the problem. This was me...Gorge '06. Sure I wasn't a PJ fan at the time, and may have said no to the invite...but no one thought to ask...not even hubby...


    And her weekend away needs to be the equivalent...a girls party weekend...like in Vegas...not a scrapbooking getaway...

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