Okay. Men, why can't you pee straight into the toilet?

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Comments

  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    wait...
    no.

    sitting down when they pee is just sad.

    no man should have to do that.

    reminds me of "about Schmidt"
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • Spunkie
    Spunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 7,095
    Oh, so right, failedP. The old dude that pulled that at my pad lasted like... gone! So wrong!
    I was swimming in the Great Barrier Reef 
    Animals were hiding behind the Coral 
    Except for little Turtle
    I could swear he's trying to talk to me 
    Gurgle Gurgle
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    tish wrote:
    Oh, so right, failedP. The old dude that pulled that at my pad lasted like... gone! So wrong!
    although - it does put me in mind for a good practical joke...


    *rubs hands together while cackling evil-like*
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • Spunkie
    Spunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 7,095
    Does it involve tucking and passed out people?
    I was swimming in the Great Barrier Reef 
    Animals were hiding behind the Coral 
    Except for little Turtle
    I could swear he's trying to talk to me 
    Gurgle Gurgle
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    tish wrote:
    Does it involve tucking and passed out people?
    oh my god - do you know me???






















    yes. it does.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • The Champ
    The Champ Posts: 4,063
    failedpersephone wrote:
    wait...
    no.

    sitting down when they pee is just sad.

    no man should have to do that.

    reminds me of "about Schmidt"

    Agreed..however the only time this is acceptable is when you are in the middle of dropping a deuce already in the seated position all comfy drinking some coffee and reading Rachael Ray's magazine..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    The Champ wrote:
    Agreed..however the only time this is acceptable is when you are in the middle of dropping a deuce already in the seated position all comfy drinking some coffee and reading Rachael Ray's magazine..
    reading Rachel Ray??



    um..you really DO sit when pissing dontcha?? ;)
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • The Champ
    The Champ Posts: 4,063
    failedpersephone wrote:
    reading Rachel Ray??



    um..you really DO sit when pissing dontcha?? ;)

    Believe it or not, it does contain a few useful recipes..My girl bought an issue last month and I'm just about done with it ;)..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    The Champ wrote:
    Believe it or not, it does contain a few useful recipes..My girl bought an issue last month and I'm just about done with it ;)..
    I hate her.

    so much.

    anyone who says "yum-o" deserves to be punched in the ass.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • The Champ
    The Champ Posts: 4,063
    failedpersephone wrote:
    I hate her.

    so much.

    anyone who says "yum-o" deserves to be punched in the ass.

    You need to chill out failedpersonphone, life is too short..smile :)..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • releaselauren
    releaselauren Posts: 384
    hrd2imgn wrote:
    but if Mom taught them right they'd wipe the seat

    You are right. My punishment for neglecting to teach them to wipe the seat, floors, and walls of errant pee is cleaning the bathroom three times a day. In my excitement of actually getting them to pee in the toliet, I forgot to advance to the next level which is "Potty-Training Level 3 (Level 2, being, you know, doing #2 on the toilet).

    ;)
    "you shall be released" ~ EV
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    The Champ wrote:
    You need to chill out failedpersonphone, life is too short..smile :)..
    hahahahahaaa

    nah dude i am quite chill - she is just annoying as hell -

    it's fake perky that gets me all grrrrrrrr


    she looks like she would screech at the hired help.

    ya know?

    and ya know i think it's strange that you read recipes while you poo - but that is cool...just never thought of doing that...

    wouldn't it make you want to crap when you are cooking? like association or something...

    hmmn...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • The Champ
    The Champ Posts: 4,063
    failedpersephone wrote:
    hahahahahaaa

    nah dude i am quite chill - she is just annoying as hell -

    it's fake perky that gets me all grrrrrrrr


    she looks like she would screech at the hired help.

    ya know?

    and ya know i think it's strange that you read recipes while you poo - but that is cool...just never thought of doing that...

    wouldn't it make you want to crap when you are cooking? like association or something...

    hmmn...

    Actually you are 100% right regarding Rachael Ray!! My fiancee works in PR and knows for a fact that her staff hates her ass because she is fake and is a total fucking bitch!!

    As for the content I read on the can, it really just depends on what I grab as I run in, you know? But come to think of it, I do get the urge often when I cook..interesting..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • zenith
    zenith Posts: 3,191
    lol - what i cant believe is that there is 9 pages of pee talk here

    girls - boys pee standing up

    boys - girls will never pee standing up - unless it's a portaloo or one of those really skanky restrooms where you simply refuse to let your arse touch the seat - even then its usually sort of a mid air squat

    girls - boys are really just revolting smelly messy creatures that know their girlfriends / mothers / wives will clean it up because it stinks

    boys - clean it up or perhaps we'll start puting those sanitary bins next to the toilet and making you clean them
    impatience is a gift ........
  • gobrowns19
    gobrowns19 Posts: 1,447
    stylo17 wrote:
    when it's HARD, sitting down IS HARD

    Lol, ah, the crazy yoga positions :D
    Happiness is only real when shared
  • prljmngrl
    prljmngrl Posts: 320
    zenith wrote:
    boys - girls will never pee standing up - unless it's a portaloo or one of those really skanky restrooms where you simply refuse to let your arse touch the seat - even then its usually sort of a mid air squat
    I hover on any toilet that isn't mine.
  • FinsburyParkCarrots
    FinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    Why should we?
  • NY PJ1
    NY PJ1 Posts: 9,533
    failedpersephone wrote:
    wait...
    no.

    sitting down when they pee is just sad.

    no man should have to do that.

    reminds me of "about Schmidt"


    i didnt want to say it outright but tis abit girly lol

    or 40 yr old virgin when it shoots up at him lol
  • know1
    know1 Posts: 6,801
    failedpersephone wrote:
    wait...
    no.

    sitting down when they pee is just sad.

    no man should have to do that.

    reminds me of "about Schmidt"

    I don't think it's sad. Maybe you're not comfortable with your masculinity. Or maybe you just don't care to be a disgusting pig who sprays urine everywhere.
    The only people we should try to get even with...
    ...are those who've helped us.

    Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
  • markymark550
    markymark550 Columbia, SC Posts: 5,223
    I don't know about you other guys, but whenever I splash, miss, or whatever I chalk it up to 'marking my territory'.....



    and this is why my wife doesn't let me use the master bathroom...

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