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What's left

justamjustam Posts: 21,410
in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
What’s left is the realization that
you have what you always wanted
somehow I just got caught back when you
didn’t realize that you’d made the choice
you’d already made the choice!
I just got dragged into it to help your transition
the transition from where you started
to where you were going
to help make your days less dull
and the transition less obvious to yourself
and for too long I used my time in that wrong way
for too long I was distracted with a love project
a beautiful dream
I know it was my choice to be distracted by love!
I had no chance
well, the chance of a snowflake on a hot beach
with the profile of one grain of sand in a million
if I’d been a less hopeful person,
I could have saved myself a lot of time.
now I’ve accepted that I chose to spend my time
walking on a path with a fascinating ghost
and now I see it wasn't the right path
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Comments

  • rollingsrollings Posts: 7,124
    as always, nice writing justam
  • chadwickchadwick Posts: 21,157
    well done, justam
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."
    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    Rollings and Chadwick, thanks for reading it. I appreciate it.
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  • vogonpoetbythelakevogonpoetbythelake Posts: 2,146
    whats left is the path
    for the heart to keep beating
    less hopeful person
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    edited January 2016
    vogonpoetbythelake said:

    whats left is the path
    for the heart to keep beating
    less hopeful person

    It made me upset to read your casual little drip of words.
    I don't want to be a less hopeful person!!!!
    I wanted my friend to be true instead of untrue.

    What I learned is that people and events are not always what we want them to be. And, effort is not always a guarantee of success in an endeavor ... it has to be the right endeavor too.

    Post edited by justam on
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  • vogonpoetbythelakevogonpoetbythelake Posts: 2,146
    I am so sorry that my response upset you...those casual little drips turn to tears at having upset you and they did come unexpectedly. My response is really about me as I related to your very moving poem, not suggesting you should be or are a less hopeful person. Once again I apologize Peace and light to you.
  • rollingsrollings Posts: 7,124
    after reading this, I just gotta say that "less hopeful person" is a direct part of the poem, and the only upsetting comment that I can see is "casual little drip of words". :frowning:



  • rollingsrollings Posts: 7,124
    I also just noticed it's a haiku ☺
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    vogonpoetbythelake said:

    I am so sorry that my response upset you...those casual little drips turn to tears at having upset you and they did come unexpectedly. My response is really about me as I related to your very moving poem, not suggesting you should be or are a less hopeful person. Once again I apologize Peace and light to you.

    I'm sorry to make you cry. I must have misunderstood what you were saying.

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  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    rollings said:

    after reading this, I just gotta say that "less hopeful person" is a direct part of the poem, and the only upsetting comment that I can see is "casual little drip of words". :frowning:



    Sometimes I speak quickly when I'm upset and I didn't realize that was a hurtful phrase. Yikes!

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