So....my Mom's gonna die soon.....

Sawyer

.....has pancreatic cancer and moved to her liver....we have hospice in.....she was diagnosed in October....I know Im a clown on here but how have others dealt with relatively sudden loss? Its beyond brutal.

Claireack

So sorry to hear this. I have no wise words of wisdom. But I'm sending hugs your way.

BinauralJam

Sorry Man , that's awful

Sawyer

Claireack wrote:

So sorry to hear this. I have no wise words of wisdom. But I'm sending hugs your way.

thank you....only 57......healthy as can be.......just staggering....and I got SHINGLES from the stress..life is good

dimitrispearljam

i wish you all the best....stay stronge

DS1119

All the best for your family.

mysticweed

you will deal
and you will get through it
i promise

mikalina

I am so sorry to read about this - :(

mfc2006

similar thing happened with my Dad....
was diagnosed with ALS in November, passed away the following April.

best to you & your family. i know it's tough, but you will get through it.

josevolution

Really sorry my best wishes to you & your family , and 81 you have to get some class dude ...

mca47

So sorry to hear that Sawyer!
Stay strong and remember just how fragile life is. Try to spend as much time with her as you can!

81

it's true.

you've got a chance to say goodbye....make your peace with her and say goodbye.

my mum had a heart attack (56 going on 57) one night (5 years ago this month) and wasn't there the next morning. i woke up to a dozen missed calls on my cell from my family. the next day, i packed a suitcase and headed home for a funeral. after the funeral, i moved on. it's life, people die. nothing you can do about it except to accept it and live your life after they are gone.

at thanksgiving i always get a bottle of wine and give her a little toast because during our holiday's we would always have a bottle or two of wine...ussally just the two of us...

anyways...

he.who.forgets

Really sorry to read about this Sawyer. I lost my dad at the age of 55 but he had cancer for nearly 6-7 years so it certainly wasnt as sudden. Nonetheless, there's not a day that goes by that I dont miss him. Sending positive vibes your way.

JOEJOEJOE

Sawyer, this post contains many facts regarding death, so if you are not in the mindset to deal with the difficult reality of your situation, you may not want to continue reading.

I recently went thru this.

My goal was to lessen any regrets I might have had when the time came for my dad to pass-away.

Spend as much time with her as possible. If you aren't good at expressing feelings towards her, silent gestures, such as holding her hand, speak volumes. My dad loved looking at photo albums duriong his final few months.

Don't try to be a martyr....everyone needs to do their part in this situation. If there is any friction btw family members, don't work it out via anger.

Familiarize yourself with the post-death process. It may make things easier to know what to expect when the sad event occurs. I educated myself on the signs of imminent death, and I called the funeral home when we knew the time was short.

The hospice service usually sends out a specialized nurse when they see that the end is near. He/she will be the one to call the hospice doctor regarding the death certificate. The hospice may also send over a social worker to help confort your family.

Make sure you know of your mom's funeral/burial wishes, and if possible, do some pre-planning with the funeral home. Hopefully, this will lessen the load when the time comes.

Finally, be very kind to the hospice staff. They are only human. and their goal is to make you mom as comfortable as possible. They won't have the same emotional attachment to the situation as you and your family.

Also, try to stay positive..this is no time to expend energy on being negative. Not everyone in the world will show you sympathy.

pandora

so tough this is, I'm sorry sawyer

sounds silly saying this but having gone through it...
cherish this time with your mama

I just saw a sign it read

home is where your mom is and you know she's gonna live in your heart
just like my mama does, this we always have

love and prayers for you and yours

BrainOfMA

:( i'm so sorry to hear this, i wish you and your family all the best

SD48277

I am so sorry. I'll light a candle for you and your mom. :(

conman

sorry to hear that, hang in there, man

mickeyrat

sorry man.

Theres really no way to prepare. just do the best you can. be there as much as you can for her. After some time passes, you'll come to appreciate that time.

I watched my dad wither away from undiagnosed lung cancer. Meanwhile I was drinking myself to death and smoking crack to boot. We both knew something was up , we chose not to speak about it. I'll always regret not being there more. The only solace I can take was , he went out the way he chose to. I was able to take on all the physical work for his business when he could no longer climb a ladder. I was paid my normal rate and he got the rest. for two years this went on.


Take it as it comes, one day at a time. One minute at a time if need be. ride the pain, dont run from it. It'll catch up eventually.its better to get through it than delay it. seems to hurt worse trying to delay it.

electronblue

hearts and thoughts to you and your family ~

PJaddicted

:( Truly deeply sorry. There is nothing that can prepare you to lose someone you love as deeply as your mom. I lost my Dad suddenly to a Pulmonary Embolism, I had about 18 months of severe grief after wards. Try your very best to practice good self care, get out for walks in nature, get some sun on your face, eat, listen to music and take it one day at a time.