PJ show w/an infant - for those that have brought one, and for those who sat near someone who did

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  • PureandEasyPureandEasy Posts: 5,769
    I can only tell you my experience, final Spectum show, Halloween 2009, second row in front of Mike.  Woman in FIRST row had a two or three year old. She basically plopped that kid down and barely paid attention to him all night. Everyone around us was concerned about that kid, even MIKE gestured to her asking if he was alright. It definitely affected my experience, so I'm a no go on bringing children under 6 to a show.   
  • NewJPageNewJPage Posts: 3,295
    I have 6 and 4 year old kids. Would I take them? Hell no. Mostly cause I don't want to babysit while I'm at a concert. I've been to over 40 pj shows. 3 since they'v been around. You sacrifice shit like this with kids. No big deal. But when you DO get a night out, enjoy it. Time away from your kids is rare, but it's a good and healthy thing.

    Additionally, it would be a major buzz kill to be at a show with a kid next to me
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  • jerparker20jerparker20 St. Paul, MN Posts: 2,399
    edited January 2018
    I have a 14 month old, I often question bringing him out to eat at restaurant, so a concert is totally off the table.  Now, I love him and he is a lot of fun, but he is a complete animal. He was super chill too, until he started walking. Long and short, I would have negative amounts of fun bringing him to anything longer than thirty minutes which includes a concert, baseball game, or anything that wouldn't allow him to run around and get to bed at a reasonable toddler time (7pm). Plus changing a shitty diaper in the men's toilet at a stadium, during a concert with lots of drunk dudes would probably suck butthole.
    Post edited by jerparker20 on
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,392
    edited January 2018
    Even though you want to go and bring your child, there are many reasons why it's not a good idea. The most obvious ones are the following-

    1) It would be too loud for a small child's ears.
    2) If your child gets overwhelmed and uncomfortable, he/she will be in distress.  The child's distress (perhaps he will cry) will make everyone else uncomfortable too. And, if you ignore the child because you want to pay attention to the concert, that's unfair to the child and to the soft-hearted adults near you. (It's also very questionable parenting!)

    Being a good parent sometimes requires sacrifices OR adjustments.  Maybe your wife can go one night and you can go the other night?  One adult can stay at the hotel with the child each night? 

    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • DewieCoxDewieCox Posts: 11,411
    The effects of loud music can’t be understated. Having ear plugs helps of course, but I know how I would feel after a loud rehearsal with my band. My whole body would ache and it would definitely affect ears even when I’d use plugs.
  • mwplummwplum Posts: 1,501
    vedpunk said:
    As a father of two kids under 5, don’t be a dipshit and bring your young kids to a rock concert.  The OP is just being stupid and selfish. Period. I’ll be the first and probably not the last to get you kicked out of the venue.
    Hey Vedpunk, I encourage your go back through the thread and re-read my posts and tell me where I'm being stupid or selfish. I guarantee that you just read the thread title, none of the posts, and decided to chime in by frankly being a jerk.

    Specifically I stated that:

    "I stared this thread nine months in advance of the shows to get some feedback for contemplation because: 
    a) I wanted to put my child's interests first - and see if anyone had brought an infant with success and/or failure; and 
    b) because I wanted to be considerate of other fans around us if we were to bring our little guy - to see if anyone has had their concert experience negatively affected by a young one."


    1992-07-21 Vancouver
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    1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
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    2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
  • KC2917KC2917 Posts: 870
    Don’t bring your kid dude. Plain and simple. The negatives far outweigh the positives. 
  • mwplummwplum Posts: 1,501
    Now that my son is 2-1/2 years old I would not take him because he would never last the whole show and he would disturb me and everyone else around us but when we took him at 6 months we were in reserved seating and quite a few around us commented that they didn't even know he was there.  At that age they are not on a schedule... if they fuss, they either need to eat, sleep, or have their shitty diaper changed so he hung out in the Baby Bjorn with his ear protection on and was extremely easy to have at the show with us.  As I mentioned before, we flew from Alberta to see them in Quebec City and it was more convenient for us to take him, make it a family trip, and do some sightseeing, rather than leave him at home with his grandparents.  The icing on the cake was having Eddie wave to us and meeting Boom and Jeff the next day so we have videos and pictures to share with him later in life when he understands... Because, there is a good chance, God forbid, that when he is actually old enough for me to take him again, PJ may not be touring anymore and if they are, it will be pretty cool for him to be able to tell his buddies that he was at his first PJ concert when he was only 6 months old...
    Did you guys stay at the Fairmont? If so I think I may have seen you guys. 
    1992-07-21 Vancouver
    1993-9-4 Vancouver
    1996-9-16 Seattle
    1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
    2000-11-6 Seattle
    2001-10-22 Seattle
    2002 -12-09 Seattle
    2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
    2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
    2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
    2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
    2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
    2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
    2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2
    2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
  • WesCWesC Posts: 92
    JimmyV said:
    I would be very uncomfortable if I got to my seats at a rock concert and there was someone sitting next to us with a baby in their arms.
    100% agree to this.  There are people around you who don't want to be around kids at a concert.
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  • mwplum said:
    Now that my son is 2-1/2 years old I would not take him because he would never last the whole show and he would disturb me and everyone else around us but when we took him at 6 months we were in reserved seating and quite a few around us commented that they didn't even know he was there.  At that age they are not on a schedule... if they fuss, they either need to eat, sleep, or have their shitty diaper changed so he hung out in the Baby Bjorn with his ear protection on and was extremely easy to have at the show with us.  As I mentioned before, we flew from Alberta to see them in Quebec City and it was more convenient for us to take him, make it a family trip, and do some sightseeing, rather than leave him at home with his grandparents.  The icing on the cake was having Eddie wave to us and meeting Boom and Jeff the next day so we have videos and pictures to share with him later in life when he understands... Because, there is a good chance, God forbid, that when he is actually old enough for me to take him again, PJ may not be touring anymore and if they are, it will be pretty cool for him to be able to tell his buddies that he was at his first PJ concert when he was only 6 months old...
    Did you guys stay at the Fairmont? If so I think I may have seen you guys.
    No, we stayed at the Hotel Port Royal down below by the river but we did stop by the Fairmont the day after the concert, which is where we ran into Jeff... 
  • Patrick_Sea3Patrick_Sea3 West Seattle Posts: 889
    Unless there is a family friendly area at a concert it isn't appropriate to bring infants or toddlers...
  • vedpunkvedpunk Posts: 806
    edited January 2018
    Again, bringing an 18 month old to a rock concert is the most reduculous thing I’ve ever heard.  And sorry but your reasoning / explanations are absurd.
    Post edited by vedpunk on
  • 2-feign-reluctance2-feign-reluctance TigerTown, USA Posts: 23,090
    vedpunk said:
    Again, bringing an 18 month old to a rock concert is the most reduculous thing I’ve ever heard.  And sorry but your reasoning / explanations are absurd.
    The OP was asking for people who have done it to
    share experiences. Clearly you haven’t, so lay off the guy for fuck’s sake. 
    www.cluthelee.com
  • on2legson2legs Standing in the Jersey rain… Posts: 14,374
    As a father of four kids between 5 and 14 years old I’ve brought my kids to a lot of baseball and football games when they were toddlers.  I went in to it with the expectation that they would have a short attention span and would be ready to go within a couple hours.  I never pushed them past their limits and I knew I would not be staying for the whole game. But I wanted to share my love of sports and have that experience of bringing them to a game.  It didn’t matter to me that we had to cut our visits short.  A concert in the other hand, especially Pearl Jam, is not an experience that I want to cut short.  So I’ve never brought them to a show.  I’m thinking my 14 year old is more than ready this go around to go with me to a show. To each his own, but a concert is not something I would try to do with an infant. 
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  • vedpunkvedpunk Posts: 806
    edited January 2018
    Sorry but anyone who has brought their 18 month to a rock concert should probably keep that to themselves or face child protective services.  Just using basic logic and reasoning here.
  • RoleModelsinBlood31RoleModelsinBlood31 Austin TX Posts: 6,136
    Op, you wouldn’t have asked the question/started the thread if you didn’t realize bringing an infant was a questionable thing to do.  Do whatever the hell you want to, it’s your call, but don’t get pissed when people tell you off for caring more about yourself than your child.
    I'm like an opening band for your mom.
  • I'd consider heading to Wrigley the day between the shows (or early the day of a show) and taking a few pics in front of the park and hanging out in the area and call that close enough.  My son loved baseball as a toddler so we'd buy the cheapest tix we could find, go to the ballpark when it opened, watch BP, walk around a little bit, and hopefully make it through a few innings.  Just can't do that at concert and like someone said there's nowhere to go at a stadium show if things go south, and odds are very high that they will at some point.  Not to mention if there is any sort of weather issue or delay for any reason - and there is a precedent for this - it's going to be a really long night.
  • I have to say I'm a little disturbed and disappointed by some of the comments on this thread.  The is the PJ "community" forum where people should feel safe to ask questions without being attacked.  I have always thought PJ fans to be a bit better educated, more respectful, and more of a family.  Regardless of whether it is right or wrong to bring a toddler or infant to a PJ concert, constructive criticism or opinions can be shared without being assholes or disrespectful...
  • mwplummwplum Posts: 1,501
    This thread is like a broken telephone. One person said 18 month and it has been repeated. My son will be just under 14 months as of August 2018. We took him to a Vancouver Canucks game last night and he had a great time. We were in a luxury box where we had the space to walk around if necessary. My son had a great time, didn’t bother anyone, and it was a really fun family experience. 

    It it made me realize that if he was to come to Fenway, that would be the only way to do it, by private box.

    So this thread has been helpful. Let’s close it down, it was a good mix of constructive criticism, support, and judgmental attacks. I’ve had enough.
    1992-07-21 Vancouver
    1993-9-4 Vancouver
    1996-9-16 Seattle
    1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
    2000-11-6 Seattle
    2001-10-22 Seattle
    2002 -12-09 Seattle
    2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
    2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
    2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
    2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
    2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
    2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
    2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2
    2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
  • mcgruff10mcgruff10 New Jersey Posts: 27,739
    I have to say I'm a little disturbed and disappointed by some of the comments on this thread.  The is the PJ "community" forum where people should feel safe to ask questions without being attacked.  I have always thought PJ fans to be a bit better educated, more respectful, and more of a family.  Regardless of whether it is right or wrong to bring a toddler or infant to a PJ concert, constructive criticism or opinions can be shared without being assholes or disrespectful...
    I agree but when someone starts a thread like this IMO they have their mind made up on what they want to do and are looking for validation to support their decision in order to make it right in their own mind. 
    I'll ride the wave where it takes me......
  • 2-feign-reluctance2-feign-reluctance TigerTown, USA Posts: 23,090
    mcgruff10 said:
    I have to say I'm a little disturbed and disappointed by some of the comments on this thread.  The is the PJ "community" forum where people should feel safe to ask questions without being attacked.  I have always thought PJ fans to be a bit better educated, more respectful, and more of a family.  Regardless of whether it is right or wrong to bring a toddler or infant to a PJ concert, constructive criticism or opinions can be shared without being assholes or disrespectful...
    I agree but when someone starts a thread like this IMO they have their mind made up on what they want to do and are looking for validation to support their decision in order to make it right in their own mind. 
    First time parent reaching out to talk? Ask questions? Hear from other parents who have been there (original request by the OP)? Tell me none of you have ever done the same when your first born arrived. 
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  • deadendpdeadendp Northeast Ohio Posts: 10,434
    vedpunk said:
    Sorry but anyone who has brought their 18 month to a rock concert should probably keep that to themselves or face child protective services.  Just using basic logic and reasoning here.
    Really? Dude is taking care of his kid. Wants a memory. He's not having baby kid crowd surf or crawling on the ground in the pit. This is not abusive, it's just not what you would do. Not CPS worthy just because you don't agree. 
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  • mcgruff10mcgruff10 New Jersey Posts: 27,739
    edited January 2018
    mcgruff10 said:
    I have to say I'm a little disturbed and disappointed by some of the comments on this thread.  The is the PJ "community" forum where people should feel safe to ask questions without being attacked.  I have always thought PJ fans to be a bit better educated, more respectful, and more of a family.  Regardless of whether it is right or wrong to bring a toddler or infant to a PJ concert, constructive criticism or opinions can be shared without being assholes or disrespectful...
    I agree but when someone starts a thread like this IMO they have their mind made up on what they want to do and are looking for validation to support their decision in order to make it right in their own mind. 
    First time parent reaching out to talk? Ask questions? Hear from other parents who have been there (original request by the OP)? Tell me none of you have ever done the same when your first born arrived. 
    I wouldn’t reach out to a Pearl Jam message board for parenting advice. 
    Post edited by mcgruff10 on
    I'll ride the wave where it takes me......
  • mwplummwplum Posts: 1,501
    That's not true, if you read my posts I was trying to decide if it was reasonable. I see parents all the time brining their infants to sports games and in my mind there is not much difference between a PJ show and a football game. I've been a Seahawks season ticket holder for many years and frankly I've seen worse behaviour from adults at NFL games than I have at PJ concerts. While there were some people who posted with positive experiences, it was overwhelmingly negative. As a result, it has made me decide that either we will have to: 1) bring my mother-in-law to watch him at the hotel while we're at the show; 2) pony up for a private box; or 3) not go. 
    1992-07-21 Vancouver
    1993-9-4 Vancouver
    1996-9-16 Seattle
    1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
    2000-11-6 Seattle
    2001-10-22 Seattle
    2002 -12-09 Seattle
    2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
    2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
    2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
    2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
    2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
    2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
    2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2
    2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
  • PJNBPJNB Posts: 12,622
    mwplum said:
    That's not true, if you read my posts I was trying to decide if it was reasonable. I see parents all the time brining their infants to sports games and in my mind there is not much difference between a PJ show and a football game. I've been a Seahawks season ticket holder for many years and frankly I've seen worse behaviour from adults at NFL games than I have at PJ concerts. While there were some people who posted with positive experiences, it was overwhelmingly negative. As a result, it has made me decide that either we will have to: 1) bring my mother-in-law to watch him at the hotel while we're at the show; 2) pony up for a private box; or 3) not go. 
    Mother in law is the way to go! We did that in 2016 and are doing it again this year for Boston. We pay for all her food, entry fees to where we are going, accommodations of course and any other expenses that there might be.  
  • vedpunkvedpunk Posts: 806
    When did a PJ band forum turn into a good resource for parenting advice?  This thread would make much more sense if the OP was asking about maybe a 6 year old, not a baby.  
  • mwplummwplum Posts: 1,501
    vedpunk said:
    When did a PJ band forum turn into a good resource for parenting advice?  This thread would make much more sense if the OP was asking about maybe a 6 year old, not a baby.  

    This isn't about parenting advice. Firstly a 6 year old would be way harder to manage than a 1 year old. A one year old would be happy being in a baby backpack, would not be affected by swearing or other things a kid might see at a show. A one year old would not be yelling, running around, or bothering others like the 6 year old. The one year old would in all likelihood would be sleeping.

    To recap the thread:
    1. OP lost his father in June of 2016, was devastated, maybe subconsciously was trying to kill himself with booze;
    2. OP went to Fenway two months later, the band dedicated a song to his father, a song that bridged their generations of music and brought them together. It was a song the band hadn't played live in 14 years. It was a really amazing moment for OP and helped him turn his life around;
    3. OP finds out soon after Fenway that he's having a baby with the love of his life, had been together for 20 years without having a child;
    4. OP quits drinking, turns life around, walks away from good job just so that he can be there for the birth of his son and support wife, spends every moment together with his son during his first four months of his life, goes back to work, but still spends all time not at work with his wife and son;
    5. Fenway 2018 is announced; OP wants to share the memory of that incredible moment in 2016 with his son;
    6. OP starts exploratory thread 8 months in advance to see if others have had good/bad experiences with an infant at a show;
    7. OP gets attacked by many just for the idea of wanting to share said moment with his son;
    8. Through thread, OP finds practical ways to share moment with his son.

    Thread is over, everyone goes home, quits the negative attacks.
    1992-07-21 Vancouver
    1993-9-4 Vancouver
    1996-9-16 Seattle
    1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
    2000-11-6 Seattle
    2001-10-22 Seattle
    2002 -12-09 Seattle
    2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
    2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
    2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
    2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
    2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
    2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
    2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2
    2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
  • mcgruff10mcgruff10 New Jersey Posts: 27,739
    edited January 2018
    I would definitely disagree that a six year old is harder to manage than a one year old. That s just silly. 
    Post edited by mcgruff10 on
    I'll ride the wave where it takes me......
  • mookieblalockmookieblalock Posts: 3,173
    edited January 2018
    I know someone who runs a baby sitting service in Boston. 
    Post edited by mookieblalock on
  • vedpunkvedpunk Posts: 806
    edited January 2018
    I also lost a father early and it doesn’t mean I don’t value your experience with the band and the dedication to your father because that is awesome.  But the answer is still don’t bring a baby to a rock concert.  Period.  I can’t believe I have to type that.
    Post edited by vedpunk on
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