At what age should kids have cell phones?

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g under p's thread just got me thinking about this. My 11-year-old cousin was insistent recently that she should get an iPhone and that seemed crazy to me. Then she made some comment about how "lucky" I was to have one and I got all parental on her, telling her about how I work my ass off so I can have nice things and if she wants similar things then she should have to work her ass off too.

Regardless, at what age should kids get cell phones? What about flip phones vs. smartphones? Does your answer change based on who's paying or, if it's the kid's money, where the money came from? Are parents spoiling their kids when they buy them iPhones, or are they just keeping them safer? Should there be certain rules for kids who have them?

It seems to me that kids - especially younger than high school age - shouldn't have fancy phones. But then again, I'm not sure why except just to not spoil them.

Just wondering y'all's thoughts on this.

EDIT: Had to fix g under p's name. I originally accidentally called him g and p, which is how we describe obstetric history. (g = gravida = # of pregnancies; p = para = # of births) Sorry, g under p; I knew that seemed wrong when I wrote it but I couldn't figure out why.

thefixer9

I say if they are buying for the iPhone/Smartphone themselves, then let them have it. But if you are going out to buy them one, I say flip phone. Believe it or not, I have nothing but a flip phone and I'm 16, and it works perfectly. It's meant for safety, not to text my friends or play games. I think around 12 a kid should get some type of phone for safety reasons, they are just good to have on them. Just my thoughts, a viewpoint from an actually teenage..

dimitrispearljam

i dont think its standar age...
i think when parents knows that their kids are responsible to have one and use it the right way

willc431994

I teach high school kids and every single one of them has a phone. They live for them, the second class has finished they are reaching for their phones, they go in to a panic when I tell them to put them away during class. These kids spend all their time staring at a screen, its crazy. I understand the importance of being able to contact family/friends when needed but these so called 'smart phones' are making our kids real stupid. They need to get their eyes away from their phone screen and take in the real world, its a pretty cool place! That's my two cents...

Digital Twilight

My personal belief is when they can buy it themselves. Too many children these days are addicted to phones and the internet. Too much of their lives revolve around non sensical information and 'celebrity' news etc. If you have to then I would just get them a cheap model (they'll probably break it or lose it anyway.) Buy them books and music instead. The mind is the greatest thing you will ever own, too many waste it infront of a screen.

DS1119

I don't think it's an easy answer. I mean other kids used to come over to my house when I was a kid and were amazed that my bedroom had a tv. Most kids these days have tvs in their bedrooms. A phone is a possession to be used responsibly and when a parent feels their child is responsible enough for it, it's their call.

BLACK35

I bought our daughter a cell phone last yr (13 yrs old) cause she was going into high school and it also more meant for safety. Got her a Blackberry (she can only txt and make calls, no other bells & whistles). At times now I almost think it was the worse thing I ever did, she is a txting monster.
At times I hide her phone and watch her go into a complete panic, almost like a herion addict looking for their next fix.

redrock

For me, whenever you start letting your child go out on his/her own - whether walk to school, quickly go to the shops or drop something in the post box - is when they should have a phone. This for safety reasons. No need to be fancy,have internet or whatever - just be able to call in emergency (or what they think may be an emergency) when they are without adult supervision.

Fancy or standard, pay as you go or plans, with or without internet access - it's up to you what you want to get for your child. If they want 'better' or 'more' than what you are willing to give, they need to pay for it.

pandora

Back in the day we got our kids phones and boy did they get in trouble in school.
I guess we were ahead of our times :fp:

I would say early, very early and have tracking devices

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willc431994 wrote:

I teach high school kids and every single one of them has a phone. They live for them, the second class has finished they are reaching for their phones, they go in to a panic when I tell them to put them away during class. These kids spend all their time staring at a screen, its crazy. I understand the importance of being able to contact family/friends when needed but these so called 'smart phones' are making our kids real stupid. They need to get their eyes away from their phone screen and take in the real world, its a pretty cool place! That's my two cents...

My mom teaches high school special ed and the cell phones can be really disruptive, to say the least.

So then do you think the so-called safety benefits outweigh the problems? Or do you think the problems only stem from the smartphones?

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Digital Twilight wrote:

My personal belief is when they can buy it themselves. Too many children these days are addicted to phones and the internet. Too much of their lives revolve around non sensical information and 'celebrity' news etc. If you have to then I would just get them a cheap model (they'll probably break it or lose it anyway.) Buy them books and music instead. The mind is the greatest thing you will ever own, too many waste it infront of a screen.

What about the argument that you can read more books and listen to more music on if you have a smartphone?

Black Diamond

Depends I guess is the right answer... Got my oldest one at 12... He needed it because of pickup from school and other friend play dates and stuff... He seems to be very responsible with it.

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BLACK35 wrote:

I bought our daughter a cell phone last yr (13 yrs old) cause she was going into high school and it also more meant for safety. Got her a Blackberry (she can only txt and make calls, no other bells & whistles). At times now I almost think it was the worse thing I ever did, she is a txting monster.
At times I hide her phone and watch her go into a complete panic, almost like a herion addict looking for their next fix.

A few years ago, I took my then 16-year-old cousin on a road trip for three weeks. All he had was an old, fucked up flip phone, but he was on that thing constantly, texting at all hours of the night (and then not getting up on time in the morning). At one point, he dropped it and it broke into pieces, but that didn't deter him. He taped it back together with electrical tape, which was fully covering the keyboard, and was still able to text at lightnight speed! It was crazy!

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redrock wrote:

For me, whenever you start letting your child go out on his/her own - whether walk to school, quickly go to the shops or drop something in the post box - is when they should have a phone. This for safety reasons. No need to be fancy,have internet or whatever - just be able to call in emergency (or what they think may be an emergency) when they are without adult supervision.

Fancy or standard, pay as you go or plans, with or without internet access - it's up to you what you want to get for your child. If they want 'better' or 'more' than what you are willing to give, they need to pay for it.

What about getting them an iPhone (or similar) so you can track them with the GPS function? That sounds pretty cool in theory, but I wonder if it would do more harm than good.

rick1zoo2

dimitrispearljam wrote:

i dont think its standar age...
i think when parents knows that their kids are responsible to have one and use it the right way

this is a good answer and I will add that it helps me as a parent to keep in contact with my kids, arrange for rides, etc. Also, I got them flip-phones, nothing fancy - voice and text only. Got them for my oldest boys a few years ago, the youngest was almost 11 when I got his for him last year.

and, as with anything, parents need to teach kids how to properly use them and to tach them to be responsible

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thefixer9 wrote:

I say if they are buying for the iPhone/Smartphone themselves, then let them have it. But if you are going out to buy them one, I say flip phone. Believe it or not, I have nothing but a flip phone and I'm 16, and it works perfectly. It's meant for safety, not to text my friends or play games. I think around 12 a kid should get some type of phone for safety reasons, they are just good to have on them. Just my thoughts, a viewpoint from an actually teenage..

Nice to have the viewpoint of an actual teenager! Thanks!

SatansFuton

I was given my first cell phone the day I turned 16 and got my driver's license. Back then there was no point in having a cell phone unless you were out and about. And even then it was just for emergencies. Still used pay phones for the most part. Times have changed though, and the phone isn't just for talking. In fact talking is the last thing most people do on their phones. Personally I still think 16, but I know that kid would be one of the few not to have one.

81

when they can pay the bill themselves

dimitrispearljam

Black Diamond wrote:

Depends I guess is the right answer... Got my oldest one at 12... He needed it because of pickup from school and other friend play dates and stuff... He seems to be very responsible with it.

Cole is very responsible kid...

Loganator....Well.....

redrock

_ wrote:

What about getting them an iPhone (or similar) so you can track them with the GPS function? That sounds pretty cool in theory, but I wonder if it would do more harm than good.

In theory....

I honestly don't know about this. Too 'big brother'-ish in a way but mega safe, just in case, in another way. Have to deal with the acceptance/non acceptance by the kid/teen of this constant 'watching' from the parent(s) and the potential 'paranoia' of said parent(s). I'm in two minds about this.

rick1zoo2

rick1zoo2 wrote:

dimitrispearljam wrote:

i dont think its standar age...
i think when parents knows that their kids are responsible to have one and use it the right way

this is a good answer and I will add that it helps me as a parent to keep in contact with my kids, arrange for rides, etc. Also, I got them flip-phones, nothing fancy - voice and text only. Got them for my oldest boys a few years ago, the youngest was almost 11 when I got his for him last year.

and, as with anything, parents need to teach kids how to properly use them and to tach them to be responsible

also, the phones I got them are 'ruggedized' and so far all have survived (even the one that was chewed on by a dog and set on fire :roll: )

Indifference71

81 wrote:

when they can pay the bill themselves

Bingo!

That's when I got mine. I was 17.

JK_Livin

A boy on my son's basketball team got an iphone last Christmas and I was like WTF, he was 9/10. My son isn't really asking for one although I sure he does. My 8 yr old daughter on the other hand wants one badly. The later the better I say.

SatansFuton

redrock wrote:

_ wrote:

What about getting them an iPhone (or similar) so you can track them with the GPS function? That sounds pretty cool in theory, but I wonder if it would do more harm than good.

In theory....

I honestly don't know about this. Too 'big brother'-ish in a way but mega safe, just in case, in another way. Have to deal with the acceptance/non acceptance by the kid/teen of this constant 'watching' from the parent(s) and the potential 'paranoia' of said parent(s). I'm in two minds about this.

All I can say is thank Christ they didn't have that when I was a teenager. I don't even know how I would manage to function socially if I HAD to be honest about where I was going. I was NEVER where I was supposed to be. My parents actually thought I saw the movie Ransom 5-6 times, to this day I still haven't seen that movie.

dimitrispearljam

btw,this is really a very good thread..thanks OP..

Drowned Out

My 9 year old got one from her mom for her birthday....I thought it was a bad idea at first, but I don't have a problem with it....my ex has begun allowing her to go to the park down the street with friends, so for safety reasons it's important (the park by my house is too far, with too much traffic along the way for me to be comfortable with it).
It's also pay-as-you-go, so it's a good incentive for her to go above and beyond to earn a few bucks doing extra chores, and as a reward system.
As with most of these decisions.....it can be a positive or a negative....parents should use these situations as an opportunity to teach their kids...if the lesson you want to teach your kids is that they need to earn things themselves...hey, that's sound advice :thumbup: . But I'm pretty sure I'd have bought her a phone before she's old enough to work, so that lesson probably wouldn't have stood the test of time anyway...
We've chatted about all of the concerns raised here. Cells and tablets aren't allowed in elementary schools, so no worries there. How much of our conversations have sunk in is yet to be determined....but I'm paying attention, and so far, she's been very responsible with it.

Drowned Out

I commented on fb just a couple weeks back how odd it seemed to be texting with my 9 yr old when i'd never had a text conversation with either of my parents

That's another cool thing.....being from a 'broken home'....it's pretty awesome to get texts from my girl when she's at her mom's. Always makes me smile

Enkidu

Both my kids were about 12 - 13 and it was mostly for after school sports and school pickup and stuff. Just flip phones, my son was fine with that but my daughter wants all the bells and whistles.

Both were told they got one do-over. My son didn't lose his first phone, but my daughter lost her first phone at a swim meet. We told her she had to wait a month, we got her another one and said this is it, lose this one, you're buying the next one yourself. And she's been much more responsible.

So far.

_

SatansFuton wrote:

redrock wrote:

_ wrote:

What about getting them an iPhone (or similar) so you can track them with the GPS function? That sounds pretty cool in theory, but I wonder if it would do more harm than good.

In theory....

I honestly don't know about this. Too 'big brother'-ish in a way but mega safe, just in case, in another way. Have to deal with the acceptance/non acceptance by the kid/teen of this constant 'watching' from the parent(s) and the potential 'paranoia' of said parent(s). I'm in two minds about this.

All I can say is thank Christ they didn't have that when I was a teenager. I don't even know how I would manage to function socially if I HAD to be honest about where I was going. I was NEVER where I was supposed to be. My parents actually thought I saw the movie Ransom 5-6 times, to this day I still haven't seen that movie.

I know what you mean. My mom always thought she was so clever, having us call from wherever we were & then getting a caller ID she thought we didn't know about. But of course we always managed to get around it. I'm sure kids will easily manage to get around a smartphone GPS too if they want to.

I'm disturbed, though, by the knowledge that you've never seen Ransom! How could you not have seen that movie? You've got to go watch it immediately. :corn:

catefrances

for personal reasons i wish cell phones had never been invented.

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http://www.npr.org/blogs/alltechconside ... s-in-class

Here's an interesting, somewhat relevant story I heard n the way home from work today about schools that encourage kids to use mobile devices.

I'm somewhat torn about computers & mobile devices in classrooms, especially with internet access. Even in college.

On one hand, I got my iPad my last year of graduate school & don't know how I ever survived without it. It was an AMAZING resource. I was able to store all the readings for all my courses for the whole semester - and even previous semesters - in one place and always have them on hand. I took all my notes on my iPad too. And I could follow along with PowerPoints & take notes directly onto the presentations. I would even get kind of irritated when professors would pass out hard copy handouts without electronic copies. When I studied for my master's exam, I only used references I had on my iPad; hard copy references ma as well have not existed. I would have been super pissed if anyone tried to ban electronic devices in the classroom.

On the other hand, I had a classmate who spent ALL her time during class either on Facebook, buying shoes online, or video chatting with her boyfriend in Mexico. It was extremely distracting to everyone around her. (And she just somehow got in to medical school. I almost feel an obligation to warn her patients about her.) So there were times when she made us long for a ban of electronic devices.

Plus - and some of the docs I work with were just talking about this today - it really seems that the constant use of electronic devices has shortened people's attention spans, doesn't it? I feel like mine has become shorter - and I used to have one of the longest attention spans of anyone I know. But there were times when I couldn't get through class without briefly checking Facebook (at least at breaks). And what am I always doing hanging around here? (Shit, right now my cat just climbed onto my lap & started purring, looking for some love, and my first reaction was to be irritated that he got in the way of my iPad! :( ) I think it's got to be much worse for kids.

Okay, I should go. :oops: