A safe place for anxiety sufferers to share.

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  • Good luck brian the pressure of getting it right is hard but no matter how it goes its for you dad and i know the emotions will be strong. Wishing you strength my friend.Thoughts_Arrive said:
    How are you doing, Rob?
    My dr increased my meds and promised me i would get better. Im still convinced more than ever this is degenerative and i won't last long. My children came over for the night which was wonderful but also so nerve racking because of my state. So i got drunk. Which didn't make it go away. Im fumbling through each 10 mins thats all. Thank you for caring my friends.
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Glad to hear from you.
    Fingers crossed the medication works.
    Some medications can take weeks to months to kick in so don't feel despair if no difference right away. I am only allowed 1 alcoholic beverage per week due to my medication. Any more may make the drug less effective. I hope you can stay away from alcohol. Have you tried other strategies when you feel overwhelmed? Breathing exercises or meditation?

    Brian, I wish you all the best this weekend.
    Stare that wave of fear and say bring it on!
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • stuckinlinestuckinline Posts: 3,357
    brianlux said:
    Rob, I'm so glad you got through the shut down OK.  That shut down WAS a bummer!  Keep hanging in there with us!

    And Rob and others who felt like posting your names, thanks!  I totally understand people not wanting to post their name so no problem there, but I also love it when people do.  I'm pretty sure you've all ready guessed mine, lol!

    My wife and I head for Medford, Oregon for my father's memorial tomorrow (Sunday) morning which means a) not likely too have internet access since I only have this computer at home, b) having to sleep somewhere away from home which is a MAJOR anxiety producer for me (the worst, really) and, c) being scheduled to play my guitar at the memorial and wanting to honor my father by getting it right which is hard to do with old arthritic hands.  I'm a complete nervous wreck and will be SO relieved when I get home Tuesday. 
    Brian, sending good vibes to you, I'm sure you'll do just fine.
    Sometimes just being there is more important than getting it 'right'.
    Just remember how many times our favorite band has f***ed up. 

    I have trouble sleeping when I'm away from home, so I completely understand your anxiety.


  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,592
    Thanks so much for the encouragements, my friends!  I hope you all do well this week too.  I'll be out of touch until Tuesday night but will catch up with you all them. 

    Be well, friends!

    Brian
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • RogueStonerRogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    I wonder how long it will take for my body to join my mind and give up its will to live. 
  • RS do you have a partner or a family member that can help to comfort you? I know exactly where you are at with this. Ive reached a point of no return not left my room 2 days. Taking meds that aren't working. I don't know who i even am. I feel your pain and hope you have someone near by to be with you at least. 
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,592
    I wonder how long it will take for my body to join my mind and give up its will to live. 

    RS do you have a partner or a family member that can help to comfort you? I know exactly where you are at with this. Ive reached a point of no return not left my room 2 days. Taking meds that aren't working. I don't know who i even am. I feel your pain and hope you have someone near by to be with you at least. 
    Stay with us, friends!  

    It took me a long time to learn how to hack rather than pack (thank you, Henry Rollins).  Still, I stummble and then have to grit my teeht and hold on for dear life.  I won't kid anyone by saying it's easy.  It's been hard, it is hard.  It's hard for those of us who are highly sensitive or are vulnerable or were never given all the tools or have chemical imbalances, but as you grow in years and the wisdom that comes with time, you get better at hanging in there and finding time for peace and happiness and you learn ways around the traps and snares.  This is not just me- I've seen others learn how as well, including others here.  Keep at it as best you can.

    I'm sending out good thoughts to you both and everyone here in pain.
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • I long for peace. I can't remember who i was anymore. If i get anywhere near peace i would be the happiest man alive. Its been many years of upset leading to this last 4 months of utter despair and worst of all confusion beyond anything ive ever known. Thank you Brian for your positive and kind wishes.
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    RS do you have a partner or a family member that can help to comfort you? I know exactly where you are at with this. Ive reached a point of no return not left my room 2 days. Taking meds that aren't working. I don't know who i even am. I feel your pain and hope you have someone near by to be with you at least. 
    How long have you been on the meds?
    If only recently, give it time. 
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • 5 weeks. 4 at 10mg and 1 at 20mg.
    The odd valium thrown in. This is not anxiety in my eyes. Totally different to the last 16 years
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Ive been on and off lots of ssri over the years.
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Don't know what to say. Hoping you find the right drug.
    Maybe another class of drug other than SSRI?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thank you. I guess its just my time is up.
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • They say music sets the sick ones free
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • HughFreakingDillonHughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 35,808
    I'm quitting alcohol (and probably weed too) for all of February as a test. Not sure about the weed though. I don't smoke that much, but everytime I smoke it I want to have a beer or a drink, so I don't need the extra temptation. I'm sure it is having a negative effect on my anxiety, and my physical symptoms which then exacerbate my anxiety, which then exacerbates my physical symptoms, and on and on it goes. 

    I have often thought of quitting booze altogether, not because of a problem issue, but because the reading I've done on it basically considers it a poison, which basically, it is. getting drunk is the response to your brain being mildly poisoned. which is fucking ludicrous if you think about it. the stuff we do for fun. 

    February is going to be one boring but well-rested month. What's it like to wake up the next day and remember what happened in the tv show you watched? LOL
    Darwinspeed, all. 

    Cheers,

    HFD




  • I don't remember without alcohol. But more power to you my friend . You can do it. I did 6 weeks. I found it pointless and yes boring. I ate tonnes of chocolate. As for weed i gave up 20 years ago but god knows i loved it. And have thought about starting again. HFD good luck. Update us here . 
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • I have been doing this for 16 years now . So many illnesses that were not illness so much fear and worry. So many places . Events . Gigs. Wasted to this . I have so much experience but no wisdom. So many opportunities none taken. All wasted . My advice is worthless .  Because if it was worth anything i would be able to use it for myself. Strange disease it is I have strange indeed
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Life wasted
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • HughFreakingDillonHughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 35,808
    Life wasted
    you can't say it was wasted until it's at its end. you are still young, you will prosper again. I know it's been a long ride so it obviously seems like this will be it for the rest. but it doesn't have to be. try to remain positive with anything you have left. 

    been reading about the paleo diet lately. I listen to a lot of Joe Rogan. He might be out of his mind. But he seems very knowledgable in everything he talks about. The claims by paleo proponents sounds pretty lofty (and the detractors are numerous). But hey, might be worth a shot, right?
    Darwinspeed, all. 

    Cheers,

    HFD




  • I'm quitting alcohol (and probably weed too) for all of February as a test. Not sure about the weed though. I don't smoke that much, but everytime I smoke it I want to have a beer or a drink, so I don't need the extra temptation. I'm sure it is having a negative effect on my anxiety, and my physical symptoms which then exacerbate my anxiety, which then exacerbates my physical symptoms, and on and on it goes. 

    I have often thought of quitting booze altogether, not because of a problem issue, but because the reading I've done on it basically considers it a poison, which basically, it is. getting drunk is the response to your brain being mildly poisoned. which is fucking ludicrous if you think about it. the stuff we do for fun. 

    February is going to be one boring but well-rested month. What's it like to wake up the next day and remember what happened in the tv show you watched? LOL
    I cut my alcohol intake back about 75% in January.  It's getting to the point where I have no real desire to have a drink.  I love the energy I have and the lack of hangovers, or even just a headache the next day.  It's done wonders.  Im hoping this path leads me to a complete exit of alcohol all together at some point down the road.....
  • kce8kce8 Posts: 1,636
    Good luck to all of you!

    This thread is as wonderful as all you people here! Nothing is wasted or too late, you need to believe in that!
    I know how it is to feel lost... life can be so dark sometimes. It's a fight to get out of it. But you will, because you deserve to. But you have to go on. Focus on the little good things in life!
    I think every single one of you can be so deeply proud of yourself for what you've already been gone through and still didn't give up! Each single one of you managed to go on! You are a being here for each other! 

    Damnit! I am proud of you!
  • Very kind words. Love to everyone here
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    I have been doing this for 16 years now . So many illnesses that were not illness so much fear and worry. So many places . Events . Gigs. Wasted to this . I have so much experience but no wisdom. So many opportunities none taken. All wasted . My advice is worthless .  Because if it was worth anything i would be able to use it for myself. Strange disease it is I have strange indeed
    I'm often better at giving advice than practicing the advice I give. I think we're all like that.
    As for alcohol, I don't miss it, don't desire it. I was never a big drinker, just social.
    Sick of being asked by people when there is alcohol about why I don't drink.

    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • England is very much like Australia drinking culture is normal. When it shouldn't be. 
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • mickeyratmickeyrat up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 35,410
    I have been doing this for 16 years now . So many illnesses that were not illness so much fear and worry. So many places . Events . Gigs. Wasted to this . I have so much experience but no wisdom. So many opportunities none taken. All wasted . My advice is worthless .  Because if it was worth anything i would be able to use it for myself. Strange disease it is I have strange indeed
    I'm often better at giving advice than practicing the advice I give. I think we're all like that.
    As for alcohol, I don't miss it, don't desire it. I was never a big drinker, just social.
    Sick of being asked by people when there is alcohol about why I don't drink.

    reply, that means theres more for you......
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • RogueStonerRogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    I’m hanging on but my fingers are slipping. I’m just so tired. I have no energy or desire to do anything. Some days I don’t have the strength to speak or fake a smile, eat or even smoke weed. Other days I can function but the mental confusion scares me. And seeing what I see and feeling what I feel doesn’t make it any easier. So I avoid people, thinking I’m protecting them and myself, but the isolation makes me feel worse. 

    Someone asked if I have someone to talk to. No, not about this. I’ve learned the hard way not to open up to, or trust, anyone, not even family. Once I am deemed “crazy”, it discredits me in every way. Like I have nothing else to offer. The few people I feel I can talk to, don’t need to be bothered by this shit. I’m grateful for this thread and all of you. At least I know I’m not alone in this struggle. 

    The worst part is that I know I can’t just rely on meds. There is no magic cure or treatment. I have to help myself. I tell myself I need to just suck it up and move forward. But how do I do that when I’m like this? I want to live, not just exist. I have to fight my way through this somehow. Right now, I’m just fighting to stay alive until this phase passes. 

    My greatest nemesis is my own mind. 
  • So true i explained it to my mum that ive slipped over the cliff and i 2 fingers gripping the loose earth above that can't hold my weight. Im afraid very afraid that this is not a phase this time. Keep posting here . Anything you need to say or vent or even just type is welcome and may help one of us as well. Keep breathing.
    brixton 93
    astoria 06
    albany 06
    hartford 06
    reading 06
    barcelona 06
    paris 06
    wembley 07
    dusseldorf 07
    nijmegen 07

    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • HughFreakingDillonHughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 35,808
    I have been doing this for 16 years now . So many illnesses that were not illness so much fear and worry. So many places . Events . Gigs. Wasted to this . I have so much experience but no wisdom. So many opportunities none taken. All wasted . My advice is worthless .  Because if it was worth anything i would be able to use it for myself. Strange disease it is I have strange indeed
    I'm often better at giving advice than practicing the advice I give. I think we're all like that.
    As for alcohol, I don't miss it, don't desire it. I was never a big drinker, just social.
    Sick of being asked by people when there is alcohol about why I don't drink.

    you know, i've been guilty of this. a former band member, who was a chronic weed smoker (he couldn't function without it), never had a beer at practice. ever. he doesn't touch alcohol. i asked him a few times, and he'd simply say he just didn't want it. i usually don't badger people about it, but i guess in this instance it intrigued me that he smoked so much weed but didn't like booze. but maybe it was something he didn't want to share, and i shouldn't have pressed. he probably gets it all the time. 
    Darwinspeed, all. 

    Cheers,

    HFD




  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    mickeyrat said:
    I have been doing this for 16 years now . So many illnesses that were not illness so much fear and worry. So many places . Events . Gigs. Wasted to this . I have so much experience but no wisdom. So many opportunities none taken. All wasted . My advice is worthless .  Because if it was worth anything i would be able to use it for myself. Strange disease it is I have strange indeed
    I'm often better at giving advice than practicing the advice I give. I think we're all like that.
    As for alcohol, I don't miss it, don't desire it. I was never a big drinker, just social.
    Sick of being asked by people when there is alcohol about why I don't drink.

    reply, that means theres more for you......
    haha, I like that.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    England is very much like Australia drinking culture is normal. When it shouldn't be. 
    I hate it. It's stupid. Why can't we socialise without booze. Upsets me.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
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