Your top ten essential skills.

brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
edited May 2017 in All Encompassing Trip
What do you consider to be the ten most important skills you know or want to know how to perform?  These can be survival skill, interpersonal skills, household skills, any others you find are important and any combination... but just your top ten!

Here's my list:

1. Knowing where to find potable water.
2. Building a fire  with only a knife, wet wood and a match.
3. Know how to perform basic first aid (CPR, Heimlich maneuver, stopping bleeding, making a splint, and treating shock).
4.  Be able to construct an emergency shelter in the outdoors.
5. Be able to swim.
6. Change a car tire and make basic repairs to an automobile.
7. Know how to procure and prepare food including identifying edible wild plants.
8.  Know how to navigate with map and compass.
9.  Be able to defuse an argument and if necessary, practice self-defense.
10.  Know how to care for vinyl records and operate a record player.

I can do all of these but admittedly am a bit weak in a few (but no problem with #10!)

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













Comments

  • rgambsrgambs Posts: 13,576
    edited May 2017
    I feel like I lump almost all of those into one lol
    Know how to be a good Scout...
    Boy Scouts taught me all of that and much more by the age of 12 or 13.  I was fortunate to have my own superb father as our Scoutmaster, so we had a top notch Troop in every way.  We didn't waste our time making key fobs, we were camping and working on survival skills all year long.  He kept ot super low key on the Christianity, emphasising Native American culture instead, and there was no worry of hanky panky trouble, he was always there to make sure everyone was safe.  Great times.  Don't know if I will Scout with my boy, I'd like to do all the same stuff without joining an organisation, but having plenty of other kids around is important to keeping a 10 year old engaged in a pursuit which features no-fun chores like clearing brush, digging ditches, and hiking for hours in the heat and cold.

    My list:
    1. Know how to Scout.  This includes all survival skills, first aid, and emergency preparedness.

    2. Know how to farm.  Basic knowledge on growing seasons, plant habits, animal husbandry, and preserving foods.

    3. Engine repair and mechanical skills.
    I have none, I am woefully under skilled in this area.

    4. Know how to cook.  Well.

    5. Know blank verse when you see it. 

    6. Learn an instrument good enough to pass the time.

    7. Know when to shut your mouth.  That one is a constant battle.

    8. Learn how to cope with negative emotions and practice actually doing so.

    9. Learn how to find your limits, and then how to push past them.

    10. "Be able to defuse an argument and if necessary, practice self-defense.". Couldn't have said it better Brian.
    Post edited by rgambs on
    Monkey Driven, Call this Living?
  • hedonisthedonist standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
    - to know when I don't know shit
    - to get the god's serenity prayer (even if not one of faith; the principles apply)
    - apologize when I'm in the wrong
    - forgive
    - and, perhaps ironically, release anger when needed
    - excel in a "vocation" - as gambo said, farming.  Also become skillful in carpentry, metalwork, plumbing
    - listen
    - find time every fucking day to have "me" time; to reflect
    - demonstrate love for those precious in our lives - and say it, too
    - recognize and deal accordingly with poisonous snakes...and people


    Shitload more!
  • rgambsrgambs Posts: 13,576
    "Shitload more!"

    No doubt!  That's why I cheated and rolled a bunch into one lol
    Monkey Driven, Call this Living?
  • WobbieWobbie Posts: 29,383
    brianlux said:
    What do you consider to be the ten most important skills you know or want to know how to perform?  These can be survival skill, interpersonal skills, household skills, any others you find are important and any combination... but just your top ten!

    Here's my list:

    1. Knowing where to find potable water.
    2. Building a fire  with only a knife, wet wood and a match.
    3. Know how to perform basic first aid (CPR, Heimlich maneuver, stopping bleeding, making a splint, and treating shock).
    4.  Be able to construct an emergency shelter in the outdoors.
    5. Be able to swim.
    6. Change a car tire and make basic repairs to an automobile.
    7. Know how to procure and prepare food including identifying edible wild plants.
    8.  Know how to navigate with map and compass.
    9.  Be able to defuse an argument and if necessary, practice self-defense.
    10.  Know how to care for vinyl records and operate a record player.

    I can do all of these but admittedly am a bit weak in a few (but no problem with #10!)

    Of Brian's, I can do #3, maybe 4, 5, 6 and 10.

    I'm a real carpenter and a bit of a plumber, but I'm not sure how "essential" those skills are.
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    edited May 2017
    rgambs said:
    I feel like I lump almost all of those into one lol
    Know how to be a good Scout...
    Boy Scouts taught me all of that and much more by the age of 12 or 13.  I was fortunate to have my own superb father as our Scoutmaster, so we had a top notch Troop in every way.  We didn't waste our time making key fobs, we were camping and working on survival skills all year long.  He kept ot super low key on the Christianity, emphasising Native American culture instead, and there was no worry of hanky panky trouble, he was always there to make sure everyone was safe.  Great times.  Don't know if I will Scout with my boy, I'd like to do all the same stuff without joining an organisation, but having plenty of other kids around is important to keeping a 10 year old engaged in a pursuit which features no-fun chores like clearing brush, digging ditches, and hiking for hours in the heat and cold.

    My list:
    1. Know how to Scout.  This includes all survival skills, first aid, and emergency preparedness.

    2. Know how to farm.  Basic knowledge on growing seasons, plant habits, animal husbandry, and preserving foods.

    3. Engine repair and mechanical skills.
    I have none, I am woefully under skilled in this area.

    4. Know how to cook.  Well.

    5. Know blank verse when you see it. 

    6. Learn an instrument good enough to pass the time.

    7. Know when to shut your mouth.  That one is a constant battle.

    8. Learn how to cope with negative emotions and practice actually doing so.

    9. Learn how to find your limits, and then how to push past them.

    10. "Be able to defuse an argument and if necessary, practice self-defense.". Couldn't have said it better Brian.
    I like your list!  And, yes, Gambs, Boy Scouts was a great learning experience for me as well.  I learned a lot of practical skills in the scouts.  Sorry to say I also learned a few not so useful skills like how to get covered head to toe with poison oak from playing combat games in the bushes at night and how to conceal smoking a cigarette by sitting close to a campfire with cig cupped in hand and blowing smoke into the fire.  But I guess that's all part of the adventure too, haha!  Seriously thought, scouting was great.
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    10 -1 in order of least to most important.( 10 least,1most)
    10. Peace.
    9. The ability to change for the better when given the opportunity in life to do so.
    8. A confidence in what you believe in in
    life, but always maintaining an open heart, and mind to new things.
    7. Hope that is unexplainable; resonates, in and touches other people's lives.
    6. Humility in all things.
    5. A healthy understanding of how things work, and how to use that knowledge effectively.
    4. A respect and generosity than spans species.
    3. The ability to communicate effectively and in a way that offers, AND deserves respect.
    2. A working knowledge of how to manage your life in a manner that creates a feeling of self worth.
    1. Being aware of your surroundings, and knowing a general emergency plan at all times, to the best of knowledge.

    I believe that if you do these things, starting with 10. And working your way to 1... you will have a successful life.  Yes.. I am still working on them.. as are we all hopefully.
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    I love how everyone has such a different idea of the essentials of their lives. :bring_it:
    keep em' coming.
  • WobbieWobbie Posts: 29,383
    tree is so cool.
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    hedonist said:
    - to know when I don't know shit
    - to get the god's serenity prayer (even if not one of faith; the principles apply)
    - apologize when I'm in the wrong
    - forgive
    - and, perhaps ironically, release anger when needed
    - excel in a "vocation" - as gambo said, farming.  Also become skillful in carpentry, metalwork, plumbing
    - listen
    - find time every fucking day to have "me" time; to reflect
    - demonstrate love for those precious in our lives - and say it, too
    - recognize and deal accordingly with poisonous snakes...and people


    Shitload more!

    10 -1 in order of least to most important.( 10 least,1most)
    10. Peace.
    9. The ability to change for the better when given the opportunity in life to do so.
    8. A confidence in what you believe in in
    life, but always maintaining an open heart, and mind to new things.
    7. Hope that is unexplainable; resonates, in and touches other people's lives.
    6. Humility in all things.
    5. A healthy understanding of how things work, and how to use that knowledge effectively.
    4. A respect and generosity than spans species.
    3. The ability to communicate effectively and in a way that offers, AND deserves respect.
    2. A working knowledge of how to manage your life in a manner that creates a feeling of self worth.
    1. Being aware of your surroundings, and knowing a general emergency plan at all times, to the best of knowledge.

    I believe that if you do these things, starting with 10. And working your way to 1... you will have a successful life.  Yes.. I am still working on them.. as are we all hopefully.
    These are both wonderful and go beyond the pragmatic to the heart and soul of things.   Thanks for inspiration, both of you.
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • RogueStonerRogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    Wobbie said:
    tree is so cool.
    +1
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    brianlux said:
    hedonist said:
    - to know when I don't know shit
    - to get the god's serenity prayer (even if not one of faith; the principles apply)
    - apologize when I'm in the wrong
    - forgive
    - and, perhaps ironically, release anger when needed
    - excel in a "vocation" - as gambo said, farming.  Also become skillful in carpentry, metalwork, plumbing
    - listen
    - find time every fucking day to have "me" time; to reflect
    - demonstrate love for those precious in our lives - and say it, too
    - recognize and deal accordingly with poisonous snakes...and people


    Shitload more!

    10 -1 in order of least to most important.( 10 least,1most)
    10. Peace.
    9. The ability to change for the better when given the opportunity in life to do so.
    8. A confidence in what you believe in in
    life, but always maintaining an open heart, and mind to new things.
    7. Hope that is unexplainable; resonates, in and touches other people's lives.
    6. Humility in all things.
    5. A healthy understanding of how things work, and how to use that knowledge effectively.
    4. A respect and generosity than spans species.
    3. The ability to communicate effectively and in a way that offers, AND deserves respect.
    2. A working knowledge of how to manage your life in a manner that creates a feeling of self worth.
    1. Being aware of your surroundings, and knowing a general emergency plan at all times, to the best of knowledge.

    I believe that if you do these things, starting with 10. And working your way to 1... you will have a successful life.  Yes.. I am still working on them.. as are we all hopefully.
    These are both wonderful and go beyond the pragmatic to the heart and soul of things.   Thanks for inspiration, both of you.
    This was such a neat exercise, that made me think, and brought out a life plan that is important to me. I admit I suck at #2, #6, #4, and #8. But such is the beauty of life; ever changing, thus always allowing for change in our lives as well.
  • PJSirenPJSiren Salem, OR Posts: 5,863
    These are in no particular order, as my mind doesn't work that way...it's like a Pachinko machine in there...

    1. How to express myself (with words)in a way that people can understand and respect.
    2. Art/Writing...because if I can't express myself creatively, I'd explode.
    3. How to grocery shop for healthy foods and cook what I buy...even though I don't like cooking.
    4. Listening skills, because sometimes people just need someone to listen.
    5. People skills, I'm good at communicating with people and helping them, I think this is important for everyone.
    6. Technical Skills(as in technology)...the more you know makes it easier for you to get a job...
    7. Managing money...I admit I struggle with this one.
    8. How to drive...because sometimes you just need an open road and some air.
    9. The ability to take the hits and keep on rolling.(sometimes I struggle here too, especially being Bipolar).
    10. To recognize when a relationship is toxic for me and get out...
    Music is my Religion and Pearl Jam, my Savior!
    Tattooed Dissident!
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    PJSiren said:
    These are in no particular order, as my mind doesn't work that way...it's like a Pachinko machine in there...

    1. How to express myself (with words)in a way that people can understand and respect.
    2. Art/Writing...because if I can't express myself creatively, I'd explode.
    3. How to grocery shop for healthy foods and cook what I buy...even though I don't like cooking.
    4. Listening skills, because sometimes people just need someone to listen.
    5. People skills, I'm good at communicating with people and helping them, I think this is important for everyone.
    6. Technical Skills(as in technology)...the more you know makes it easier for you to get a job...
    7. Managing money...I admit I struggle with this one.
    8. How to drive...because sometimes you just need an open road and some air.
    9. The ability to take the hits and keep on rolling.(sometimes I struggle here too, especially being Bipolar).
    10. To recognize when a relationship is toxic for me and get out...
    Like a Pachincko machine- I love it! :rofl:
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • tempo_n_groovetempo_n_groove Posts: 38,853
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    Hahahaha!! I love that the Rubix cube made your list of things to master! 
    Relpading your own ammo is an art. I have tried for years.. but I have nerve damage, that causes shaking in certain hand/arm positions.. it spills and wastes much too much black poweder and so I have been cut off from the reloading process :lol: . But it is very helpful to be able to reload hour own ammo.
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    The Rubix cube??!!  Ha!  For me that would be like trying to learn calculus or trigonometry.  I'm fascinated by people with brains that can work that way!

    #7 Reading and comprehension.  Were I to revise my list, that would be a must!
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • Jason PJason P Posts: 19,121
    The Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique needs to be on that list
  • HesCalledDyerHesCalledDyer Maryland Posts: 16,416
    I don't know if these are my top ten, but they're the first ten I thought of.  In no particular order:

    1. Know how to drive a manual transmission.
    2. Perform basic vehicle maintenance (check/change fluids, filters, belts, flat tire, etc).
    3. Understand and use proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation - even if it's "just the internet."  And especially understand that it's should/could/would/might HAVE (or the abbreviated 've), not OF.  Fuck, that drives me up a god damned wall!
    4. Understand when someone corrects your grammar that they're not being a Nazi, they're trying to help.
    5. Know the phone numbers of your local public safety offices. At the very least, have them programmed in your phone.
    6. Admit your faults and learn from them.
    7. Understand the strengths and weaknesses of the people closest to you.
    8. Learn to use the word "no," especially in situations unfavorable to you.
    9. Men: learn how to tie a double-windsor knot. It's not that difficult.
    10. Communication is a two-way street.  Don't just wait for the other person to stop talking so you can talk, listen to what they're saying.


  • tempo_n_groovetempo_n_groove Posts: 38,853
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    Hahahaha!! I love that the Rubix cube made your list of things to master! 
    Relpading your own ammo is an art. I have tried for years.. but I have nerve damage, that causes shaking in certain hand/arm positions.. it spills and wastes much too much black poweder and so I have been cut off from the reloading process :lol: . But it is very helpful to be able to reload hour own ammo.
    I know ammo reloading isn't difficult but it's still something I'd like to learn.brianlux said:
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    The Rubix cube??!!  Ha!  For me that would be like trying to learn calculus or trigonometry.  I'm fascinated by people with brains that can work that way!

    #7 Reading and comprehension.  Were I to revise my list, that would be a must!
    Damn right a Rubix cube!  I'm asking one for my birthday and I'm gunna rock that mofo!
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    Hahahaha!! I love that the Rubix cube made your list of things to master! 
    Relpading your own ammo is an art. I have tried for years.. but I have nerve damage, that causes shaking in certain hand/arm positions.. it spills and wastes much too much black poweder and so I have been cut off from the reloading process :lol: . But it is very helpful to be able to reload hour own ammo.
    I know ammo reloading isn't difficult but it's still something I'd like to learn.brianlux said:
    This is great!

    1- The ability to lead and to be lead if needed.
    2- How to fall a tree.  How to chop one down without killing someone or having the tree destroy something, lol.
    3- How to build things/construction and engineering(mechanicaly inclined) like a house, shelter, fortress, irrigation. Read schematics.
    4- Marksmanship in firearms
    5- Gardening/farming and animal husbandry, fishing.
    6- Operating machinery
    7- Reading and comprehension
    8- Navigation/map reading.  I see this as a dying art now that everyone google maps directions.
    9- Organization skills.
    10- Story telling.

    Things I need to learn-

    1- Preserving meat.
    2- Navigate by the stars.
    3- Learn what foliage you can eat in the wilderness.
    4- Reloading bullets
    5- Get better at skinning/cleaning game and tanning hides.
    6- The Rubix cube.
    The Rubix cube??!!  Ha!  For me that would be like trying to learn calculus or trigonometry.  I'm fascinated by people with brains that can work that way!

    #7 Reading and comprehension.  Were I to revise my list, that would be a must!
    Damn right a Rubix cube!  I'm asking one for my birthday and I'm gunna rock that mofo!
    I got two rows with the same color once!  :lol:

    We had a kid in the store a few years back who could do a Rubx Cube behind his back.  He asked me to mix it up as best I could then took a good look at it, placed it behind his back and in very short order- voila!- had it nailed just like that.  Blew my mind.
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • mca47mca47 Posts: 13,244
    1-10
    Knowing how to please the ladies.



    Awe...yeah...
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    mca47 said:
    1-10
    Knowing how to please the ladies.



    Awe...yeah...
    Haha, Duly noted!

    (Note to self:  This means keep your wife happy!)
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • PJSirenPJSiren Salem, OR Posts: 5,863
    brianlux said:
    PJSiren said:
    These are in no particular order, as my mind doesn't work that way...it's like a Pachinko machine in there...

    1. How to express myself (with words)in a way that people can understand and respect.
    2. Art/Writing...because if I can't express myself creatively, I'd explode.
    3. How to grocery shop for healthy foods and cook what I buy...even though I don't like cooking.
    4. Listening skills, because sometimes people just need someone to listen.
    5. People skills, I'm good at communicating with people and helping them, I think this is important for everyone.
    6. Technical Skills(as in technology)...the more you know makes it easier for you to get a job...
    7. Managing money...I admit I struggle with this one.
    8. How to drive...because sometimes you just need an open road and some air.
    9. The ability to take the hits and keep on rolling.(sometimes I struggle here too, especially being Bipolar).
    10. To recognize when a relationship is toxic for me and get out...
    Like a Pachincko machine- I love it! :rofl:
    haha thanks, Brian... :tongue:
    Music is my Religion and Pearl Jam, my Savior!
    Tattooed Dissident!
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    PJSiren said:
    brianlux said:
    PJSiren said:
    These are in no particular order, as my mind doesn't work that way...it's like a Pachinko machine in there...

    1. How to express myself (with words)in a way that people can understand and respect.
    2. Art/Writing...because if I can't express myself creatively, I'd explode.
    3. How to grocery shop for healthy foods and cook what I buy...even though I don't like cooking.
    4. Listening skills, because sometimes people just need someone to listen.
    5. People skills, I'm good at communicating with people and helping them, I think this is important for everyone.
    6. Technical Skills(as in technology)...the more you know makes it easier for you to get a job...
    7. Managing money...I admit I struggle with this one.
    8. How to drive...because sometimes you just need an open road and some air.
    9. The ability to take the hits and keep on rolling.(sometimes I struggle here too, especially being Bipolar).
    10. To recognize when a relationship is toxic for me and get out...
    Like a Pachincko machine- I love it! :rofl:
    haha thanks, Brian... :tongue:
    You bet, PJS!  Best line I heard all week.  Tickled my funny side big time!  :smile:
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • PJSirenPJSiren Salem, OR Posts: 5,863
    brianlux said:
    PJSiren said:
    brianlux said:
    PJSiren said:
    These are in no particular order, as my mind doesn't work that way...it's like a Pachinko machine in there...

    1. How to express myself (with words)in a way that people can understand and respect.
    2. Art/Writing...because if I can't express myself creatively, I'd explode.
    3. How to grocery shop for healthy foods and cook what I buy...even though I don't like cooking.
    4. Listening skills, because sometimes people just need someone to listen.
    5. People skills, I'm good at communicating with people and helping them, I think this is important for everyone.
    6. Technical Skills(as in technology)...the more you know makes it easier for you to get a job...
    7. Managing money...I admit I struggle with this one.
    8. How to drive...because sometimes you just need an open road and some air.
    9. The ability to take the hits and keep on rolling.(sometimes I struggle here too, especially being Bipolar).
    10. To recognize when a relationship is toxic for me and get out...
    Like a Pachincko machine- I love it! :rofl:
    haha thanks, Brian... :tongue:
    You bet, PJS!  Best line I heard all week.  Tickled my funny side big time!  :smile:
    awww, glad I could make you laugh... :D
    Music is my Religion and Pearl Jam, my Savior!
    Tattooed Dissident!
  • RogueStonerRogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    edited May 2017
    I have a friend...she's 32 with 3 kids. And completely helpless. She has very few, if any, life skills (that I've seen). In my eyes, she is a child...completely dependent on others and no coping or basic survival skills. Her parents and other family have abandoned her. I may not be family, but I believe "it takes a village...". So yes, I will be inviting them for dinner all the time and watching closely for other needs. No way in hell will I let those little girls (3, 4, 6) suffer. As for their mom, she's a mess. But then again, so am I. So are many of my friends and acquaintances. So instead of judging and washing my hands of her, I make myself available, I watch to make sure the girls are safe and happy and have their needs met, As do our neighbors. It is so rare to find such caring people. Rare, indeed. 
    Post edited by RogueStoner on
  • hedonisthedonist standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
    I have a friend...she's 32 with 3 kids. And completely helpless. She has very few, if any, life skills (that I've seen). In my eyes, she is a child...completely dependent on others and no coping or basic survival skills. Her parents and other family have abandoned her. I may not be family, but I believe "it takes a village...". So yes, I will be inviting them for dinner all the time and watching closely for other needs. No way in hell will I let those little girls (3, 4, 6) suffer. As for their mom, she's a mess. But then again, so am I. So are many of my friends and acquaintances. So instead of judging and washing my hands of her, I make myself available, I watch to make sure the girls are safe and happy and have their needs met, As do our neighbors. It is so rare to find such caring people. Rare, indeed. 
    Man, I am not heartless but pretty sure I'm a selfish person =)  I simply don't have what it takes to take on part of someone else's parental role, responsibilities...and I admit that I do judge, within reason.  I have to.  It's a necessity in navigating life - self-preservation, I suppose.  An essential skill too, perhaps.

    Hell knows I have been and continue to be judged.

    It's never too late to acquire skills, especially those paramount to keeping yourself (oneself) in check so you can truly parent.

    As to being a mess, who isn't, in some way :)
  • rgambsrgambs Posts: 13,576
    hedonist said:
    I have a friend...she's 32 with 3 kids. And completely helpless. She has very few, if any, life skills (that I've seen). In my eyes, she is a child...completely dependent on others and no coping or basic survival skills. Her parents and other family have abandoned her. I may not be family, but I believe "it takes a village...". So yes, I will be inviting them for dinner all the time and watching closely for other needs. No way in hell will I let those little girls (3, 4, 6) suffer. As for their mom, she's a mess. But then again, so am I. So are many of my friends and acquaintances. So instead of judging and washing my hands of her, I make myself available, I watch to make sure the girls are safe and happy and have their needs met, As do our neighbors. It is so rare to find such caring people. Rare, indeed. 
    Man, I am not heartless but pretty sure I'm a selfish person =)  I simply don't have what it takes to take on part of someone else's parental role, responsibilities...and I admit that I do judge, within reason.  I have to.  It's a necessity in navigating life - self-preservation, I suppose.  An essential skill too, perhaps.

    Hell knows I have been and continue to be judged.

    It's never too late to acquire skills, especially those paramount to keeping yourself (oneself) in check so you can truly parent.

    As to being a mess, who isn't, in some way :)
    I'm with you there, I'm a relatively judgemental person by nature, arrogant too.
    I tend to think my approach is the correct one, and everyone else is a fool lol

    Fortunately, my nature allows me to give ZERO fucks if other people feel the same way about me! 
    Monkey Driven, Call this Living?
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,596
    edited May 2017
    I try to help others lacking in basic living skills on a personal level where and when I can yet maintain boundaries (which includes knowing my limits and not getting sucked into something I can't do anything about anyway) as well.  In the past I have helped take care of a few family and extended family kids part-time and  occasionally for a few hours here and there now (like just last night taking two step-grandchildren for a picnic yesterday) but I know my limits- I can't take it all on.

    And then there's the near hopeless cases.  When I worked in human services, the prof I worked with referred to clients who are hard core addicts or people who have almost zero chance of getting emotionally healthy as "bottomless pits".  She once said, "If you give up most of your free time, your money, your own family and your job you might, might, make a dent in someone who is a bottomless pit."  Those seemed like harsh words to me because at the time  that's basically what I was trying to do for a friend who admitted she wanted to drink herself to death.  I did everything I could for her and yet she did, indeed, drink herself to death.  Boundaries are a tough one, but I think an important part of knowing how far you can go in helping others who are greatly lacking in basic emotional and/or survival skills.

    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • 2-feign-reluctance2-feign-reluctance TigerTown, USA Posts: 23,090
    Wherever I can get insulin. Cos' without it, I'm dead in a few days.
    www.cluthelee.com
Sign In or Register to comment.