Trail Thoughts

whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
I hike a lot, because it helps me kinda process things.. I guess I'm like a dog in that way, as well as many other ways in my life. Sometimes I have to take really long hikes to work things out, and today was one of those days... except I got snowed out, at about 3 miles in.. (I had packed for 16). But true to what I'd asked for, God showed me something about myself that really hit home.. I mean HARD hit..

I wrote what I did to Thoughts_Arrive ( referencing him as a Chihuahua) just before I waked out the door to attend Church. I got there, greeted all my friends, and then worship started, and I
Just couldn't 'connect'.. half way through, I got Scripture slammed with this.:
. "“And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭25:40‬ ‭NKJV.
Then this :
“Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5:23-24‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Old school law applied to new law. New law is this.. we are to love our neighbors.. even the crazy Australians.. as our brother and sister.. right? But then I got spiritually body slammed with this:
“If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? And this commandment we have from Him: that he who loves God must love his brother also.”
‭‭I John‬ ‭4:20-21‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Right in the middle of me sitting there with my pants on fire, trying to convince God of how great I think He is.. I got my butt called out..
Then I went home and tried to rectify things, by explaining where I was coming from, in what I'd said.. I got some undercover 'Hoorahs' for it as well as some PM butt chewing..but the fact that he has just disappeared ( he does this.. but something has felt different this time.. and I've 'yelled ' at him for this before too), it has been on my mind a lot.. As I struck stride today.. I just kept praying, "please God, don't let this guy have killed himself over what I said. " I am
Praying that hopefully he reads that, and changes his life, not takes it.. but I sure got my ass handed to me in the Bible..
NOW by this time, snow had started.. and I had the microscopic dog with me, and I wasn't dressed for snow, I'd headed out early, ( on trail by 8:30) to be able to make my 16 miles by 1-1:30, before this was supposed to hit.
And at some point it started snowing so hard that I almost couldn't see.. and all I could think was " ''tis was so dumb.., I will look stupid dying out here.." then God showed me what I'd asked for. So was[ dumb]my response to TA. I had reacted in anger/frustration.. and I should have put as much prayer into asking what to say to help him, or if to speak to his issues at all, as I did in begging for forgiveness after the damage was already done. I am trying to learn how to show the changes God has made in
My life, through love, mercy, and grace; but I admit I fail at that a LOT. I know, that posting Scripture is frowned upon here.. but at least in this context, the finger is pointing at myself, and no one else.. just as it should be. I got a good mental, spiritual, and semi-physical work out today.
D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!

Comments

  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
    Hahahaha!! There's a really long run in sentence in there!
    D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

    The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
    We are all different. So much so, that no one could ever replace YOU. I don't even know what brought this thought to light.. but it just rang out in my head for four miles..
    So.. what is it that makes youYOU? That's a really unique question that many ask their entire lives.. I guess that is part of being self aware, you know?
    We become self aware somewhere around the age of six, and from there, we begin to define who we are. Character, and personality are being built at this point. Everyone has completely different interpretations of the exact same experience.. all because there is something unique in us, something that transcends definition, and understanding.
    D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

    The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
    Continuing thought from earlier:

    What makes me ME? What can I do that no one else in this world can do? ( other than piss everyone off in half a sentence or less)

    I can 'talk' to the animals, but that is not unique.... I can solve the strangest of problems, given a moment, but that is not unique.. so what is it that makes me.. so.. ME?
    D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

    The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
    The power of music.

    Music is a langue that is universal, thematic, dramatic, synergetic, abstract, and yet so tangible. It is memory, it is feeling, it is a living breathing sound. It holds and inspires life. It brings out the best in us; taming the worst in us. It brings us together. It heals. It makes irreparable damage knit itselfback together. It can make our scars beautiful. If we were vases in China, music would be the Gold that holds our broken pieces together; making us that beautiful new vessel.
    This place is proof of the
    Power music holds.



    If PJ disbands... what happens to us?
    D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

    The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!
  • whispering handswhispering hands Under your skinPosts: 13,527
    Monday, at work, I got pick-pocketed for my phone. I kind of freaked out a little for a second.. then i called it.. it had been shut off.. I tried to locate it via the cloud... nothing.. so I went home, and I struggled with my anger.. fighting between feeling justified in calling the thief everything but white..and being called to forgive.. I was sitting in my car just seething with anger and vitriol.. and while I was stewing in my emotional soup.. God reminds me of all the times I stole money from my sisters, my friends, boyfriends.. anyone 'dumb'/aka trusting enough to leave ANY money out in the open.. for alcohol.. that ended that argument in my soul.. I began to pray to ask God to help me to be able to forgive the kid that did this..
    the next morning, I went back to work, and we looked over the tapes.. but couldn't really see anything.. all day yesterday, I struggled intermittently with my anger.. and then my friend ( the lady I help with the horses) Karen came in and basically gave me this advice:
    Forgiving them is greater in benefits to you..
    and I remember telling her about the anger study I had read.. I finally just let it go.. went about getting my ID and food stamps card replaced.. and finished my
    Day.
    Today I got a lot of research done, and then when I got to work, there was my phone.. sans ID and food card, but intact, fully secure, and dead.. lol. There was a small note attached that said:
    I am sorry that I stole your phone. Sorry that I threw away your things.

    It was signed, and according to my boss, at around 10 this morning, a very angry mother dragged her 17 yr son into the store to return the phone..
    that's a LOT to digest...
    D1B50013-8BB5-4861-B9BC-AA0D88D58DF4.jpg

    The first rule of the ten club fight club is you don't talk about the ten club fight club!
  • Godfather.Godfather. Posts: 12,504

    The power of music.

    Music is a langue that is universal, thematic, dramatic, synergetic, abstract, and yet so tangible. It is memory, it is feeling, it is a living breathing sound. It holds and inspires life. It brings out the best in us; taming the worst in us. It brings us together. It heals. It makes irreparable damage knit itselfback together. It can make our scars beautiful. If we were vases in China, music would be the Gold that holds our broken pieces together; making us that beautiful new vessel.
    This place is proof of the
    Power music holds.



    If PJ disbands... what happens to us?

    very well put, if PJ disbands ? that my friend is inevitable but the memories and recordings left behind will last for generations to come.
    there will always be that band that catches the hearts of fans world wide, bands that create what you've described above.


    it dosen't matter to me what a man dose for a living you understand..
    as long as his interest's don't conflict with mine.
  • donnaruhldonnaruhl Posts: 2,096
    God has humor, And God does listen. And God understands our frustrations. Behind the wheel of my truck, I would talk to him daily. Sometimes I'd bitch and complain, And sometimes, about him. Not giving me some kind of sign or something that would let me know, That my words weren't in vain. I didn't care who saw me spewing my guts out behind the wheel,Because for all they knew,I was talking on my phone.Well,One day I was having one of my deep conversations, And as usual I'd asked him why he couldn't at least show me that he was listening,Just some kind of sign...Soon, After I had finished my rant, I came to a stop at a traffic light. I noticed a car inching past me on my left. As it was nearing the car in front of it, Something made me look towards it's licence plate. Around the plate cover, were the words, "Have a nice day Donna" So it only goes to show that he not only has humor, He listens too. Much Love Tree. 
  • ShynerShyner Posts: 276
    Very interesting reading. I love it. 

  • AnnafalkAnnafalk SwedenPosts: 3,191
    Thanks for sharing, this is great !
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